


Stay

by Gōng Lì Yǎ (Potchans)



Series: 100 TianShan Smut Prompts [7]
Category: 19天 - Old先 | 19 Days - Old Xian
Genre: Angst, Confessions, Eventual Smut, Everybody Bottoms, Everybody Tops, First Time, Fluffy, Heartwarming, M/M, My master gave me a sock, Slow Burn, Therefore I am a free elf, This fanfiction is finally finished, added underage because they are 15, blowjob, hurray, switch - Freeform, wet dreams
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-13
Updated: 2018-08-24
Packaged: 2019-04-22 05:52:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 6
Words: 61,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14302194
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Potchans/pseuds/G%C5%8Dng%20L%C3%AC%20Y%C7%8E
Summary: “No, no.” He Tian’s final answer made Mo Guan Shan’s shoulders relax. “I don’t want you to go.”A short fanfiction about Mo Guan Shan actually staying, right after chapter 237.





	1. Honesty

**Author's Note:**

> So, after chapter 237 I just had to write something. That chapter grew so much onto me that I had to write something about it.
> 
> In the end I decided to write a small fanfic about Mo Guan Shan actually staying, instead of going back home. I wanted to go for something fluffy and heartwarming, instead of smutty, just for a change of scenery.
> 
> I hope you enjoy it.

“I’ll pay you ten times.”

Mo Guan Shan was crossing the front door when He Tian said that, the touch of his hand still lingering on the back of his head, bringing a small déjà vu feeling.

And it was that déjà vu feeling that Mo Guan Shan blamed when he stopped walking and grabbed his cellphone. He typed in a text message as quickly as he could before he felt He Tian’s head over his shoulder, trying to see what he was doing. Nosy bastard.

It wasn’t like he could ignore that the gesture He Tian had just done reminded him of what happened a few weeks prior. It wasn’t like he could ignore the fact that even though he pushed He Tian away – or at least tried to, He Tian was still there for him when he clearly needed.

He owed He Tian.

And now He Tian needed him.

Of course he wasn’t dying, it was just probably a harmless cold that happened to be stronger than usual, but he still needed help. He Tian didn’t know how to cook, and sick people need better diet balance than healthy people. Besides everything, He Tian was feeling weak. So weak that Mo Guan Shan was able to overpower him not only once, but twice in a single day.

Nobody overpowered He Tian, especially Mo Guan Shan.

But still, He Tian had helped him, and even though that dinner Mo Guan Shan cooked was enough to pay it back, everybody knew that Mo Guan Shan didn’t consider it a good enough payment, he needed to do more. And because of He Tian’s gesture, that one he had done back when he told Mo Guan Shan he wasn’t alone, but now on his head instead of his back, that gesture meant much more than only a pat.

Unfortunately, all pointed to this situation as being the perfect chance for Mo Guan Shan to finally pay his debt and, hopefully, get rid of He Tian once and for all.

That’s why, when he finally sent the text, his grip on his dirty jacket tightened, and he turned around, passing by He Tian and getting inside the apartment once more.

“I thought you were going home.” A very confused He Tian asked, not understanding why such fast and big change of mind.

“Do you want me to go?” Mo Guan Shan retorted, his back still facing He Tian, but his head slightly turned.

“No.” He Tian’s response was hasty. “Yes.” He was trying to make sense, but the situation was too unusual for his neurons to actually work properly. “I mean,” He tried explaining himself, walking towards Mo Guan Shan meanwhile. “Your mom is probably worried, and you told her you were going back home.”

“But do you or don’t you?” Mo Guan Shan asked again, trying to ignore how his throat seemed like it was tied to a knot. He almost regretted asking it again.

“No, no.” He Tian’s final answer made Mo Guan Shan’s shoulders relax. “I don’t want you to go.” After his soundless laugh, Mo Guan Shan was sure he wouldn’t like what would come next. “I actually threw you on the tomato sauce in order to make you stay.”

“Dick.” Mo Guan Shan scoffed and went away, walking towards the kitchen. He Tian was a sneaky bastard, but even so it was clear that he was being followed. “Were you actually trying to cook something or did you do all this stuff with the tomato sauce only to bring me over?”

He Tian wanted to laugh at Mo Guan Shan’s statement. Part of him wanted to make fun of how Mo Guan Shan suddenly put himself in such high level that He Tian would do something in order to bring him over, which He Tian was actually one hundred percent capable of doing. But the other part of him wanted to just answer the question truthfully and not make Mo Guan Shan angrier than he already was.

“Both.” He Tian said, walking towards Mo Guan Shan and grabbing the half empty tomato sauce can. “At first I thought about making something to cook, but then I had this idea and I just had to try it.” He shrugged, noticing that Mo Guan Shan was trying his hardest to not jump on him and punch him. Again. “So both.”

It was clear that Mo Guan Shan was mad, but he still didn’t do anything. At last he decided to just go on with the madness and sort of play along. So Mo Guan Shan took the can from He Tian’s hands and threw it in the garbage bin, not really caring if there was still some tomato sauce inside.

“Do you want me to make something for us?” Mo Guan Shan tried to sound nice, but his grumpy expression and his annoyed voice sounded otherwise.

“Yes.” He Tian wanted to of course make some snarky comment of how Mo Guan Shan was being good to him, but how he was afraid of scaring him away, He Tian just settled with the simple affirmative.

His answer made Mo Guan Shan start moving through the kitchen, opening and closing cupboard and fridge doors searching for ingredients. As he suspected, He Tian didn’t have anything decent to make into a meal in his house. So with a final sigh, Mo Guan Shan turned once more to He Tian.

“You don’t have any fucking food here.”

“I don’t know how to cook.” He Tian said as it was the most obvious thing in the world. Both of them knew it was.

“There isn’t even take-out in the bin, He Tian.” Mo Guan Shan messed his short hair, repeating to himself the ‘do not punch the sick guy in the gut, do not punch the sick guy in the gut’ mantra. “Are you living off of instant noodles?” He asked at last.

“Mostly, yeah.”

“No wonder why you’re sick.” Mo Guan Shan commented, rolling his eyes. “You can’t live off of this shit.”

“Worried, little Mo?” He Tian just couldn’t keep his mouth shut, just laughing at Mo Guan Shan’s annoyed expression when he said it.

“Fuck you.” Mo Guan Shan spat, still holding most of his anger inside, not to punch He Tian, even though that was a perfect opportunity. After a long sigh, he walked to the door and asked: “Aren’t you coming? Or do you really think I’m gonna pay for the groceries too?”

“I’m going.”

Their trip to the grocery store was mostly calm, considering how they acted with each other. It was full of He Tian holding himself back not to invade Mo Guan Shan’s personal space, and Mo Guan Shan controlling his short temper to not lose his cool every time He Tian opened his mouth or got closer.

When they went back to He Tian’s apartment, Mo Guan Shan made He Tian lie on his bed, considering how worse he was looking compared to when Mo Guan Shan got there. As soon as He Tian was where he was supposed to be, Mo Guan Shan went back to the kitchen and started to cook. He chose to make something that was healthy, but still light, since it was a fact He Tian wouldn’t be able to eat something too heavy.

It didn’t take long for Mo Guan Shan to finish cooking, but even so, when he called He Tian, he got no answer. For a moment Mo Guan Shan thought He Tian was just being a jerk and was ignoring him just to make him come closer, but as soon as he reached the bed he noticed that it wasn’t the case. He Tian was fast asleep, his breathing heavy and his eyes moving fiercely, so much Mo Guan Shan could see the movement with them closed.

He Tian was probably having a bad dream.

Mo Guan Shan pondered his options. On one hand he could just grab some of the soup he had cooked and bring to He Tian in bed, but that would certainly lead to his demise, as He Tian would never forget about it and often remind him of what he had done. On the other hand he could just wake He Tian up, even though he was afraid of waking He Tian in the middle of a bad dream. What if he were attacked?

Of course, being attacked was still better than being teased, so in the end Mo Guan Shan chose to wake He Tian up.

He shook He Tian’s shoulder lightly, increasing both force and speed as he noticed his first light efforts weren’t doing much. It didn’t take long for He Tian to wake up, sort of startled. Mo Guan Shan waited for He Tian’s eyes to focus and his expression to become less confused, and then he finally talked.

“Dinner’s ready.” Mo Guan Shan’s voice was lower and softer than usual, as he was still afraid of He Tian’s reactions.

“How long have I slept?”

“Not long.” He answered. Mo Guan Shan moved a little farther from the bed when he noticed He Tian getting up, probably still half-asleep.

“What did you cook?” He Tian asked, now looking at Mo Guan Shan while doing so.

“Chicken soup, steamed vegetables.”

“I thought you were making me stew.” He Tian whined, stretching his back after he got up.

“Stew is too heavy.” Mo Guan Shan said while walking towards the kitchen. “Your stomach can’t handle it.” He explained, even though he didn’t want to, as he set up the table for them to eat.

“See?” He Tian sneaked on him, invading his personal space quickly, that teasing tone lingering on his voice. “You are worried.”

“That’s not worry.” Mo Guan Shan dodged He Tian, sitting on the chair opposite to him. “I just want you to get better fast so you won’t bother me anymore.”

“I thought you said you didn’t hate me.” He Tian argued, his hurt expression hidden under his smirk.

“Yeah, I don’t.” Mo Guan Shan finally admitted out loud. However, He Tian wasn’t waiting for what came next. “I just put up with this.” He shrugged, his index finger pointing at him and at He Tian, back and forth.

And that hurt.

That hurt He Tian much more than Mo Guan Shan saying that he was a bother. But deep down He Tian was aware of that, so he just kept hiding his true emotions behind one of his many fake smiles, and just kept trying to talk to Mo Guan Shan.

“How was school today?” Changing the subject seemed like a smart idea, so that was what he did.

“At first I thought it would be wonderful, since you weren’t there to annoy the shit outta me…” There is was, another blow on He Tian’s façade, but he kept acting. “But goddamn, those girls can be more annoying than you.”

Girls.

As far as He Tian knew, girls didn’t talk to Mo Guan Shan or vice-versa.

“Girls?”

“Yes, girls.” Mo Guan Shan rolled his eyes, wondering if they would get stuck there someday, so much he did it. “Your fucking girlfriends wouldn’t stop asking me where you were.”

“I don’t have girlfriends.” For a second, He Tian forgot about Mo Guan Shan’s previous sharp words, amused with his reactions while talking about He Tian’s fans.

“Tell them to the damn seven girls that approached me today.”

“Only seven?” He Tian teased. “I guess they didn’t miss me that much today.”

“Show off.” Mo Guan Shan muttered, but still loud enough for He Tian to hear.

“I thought they were annoying.”

“They are, damn it.” Everything about Mo Guan Shan’s actions and words at that moment were contradictory. It was almost like he was jealous. He Tian just didn’t know about what.

“Not gonna deny, they can be worse than Jian Yi if they want.” Although his comment actually made Mo Guan Shan chuckle, it happened so fast that He Tian weren’t able to see it, only hear.

“What was with that outfit of yours today, by the way?” Mo Guan Shan asked, surprising He Tian, who wasn’t expecting him to actually keep the conversation going.

“Outfit?”

“The suit jacket you were wearing when I got here. I didn’t know you even had a suit.”

“Well, that one wasn’t mine, though.” He Tian observed Mo Guan Shan stop eating for a brief moment, his eyes focused on some random point behind He Tian and his brows furrowed even further than usual.

“Whose, then?”

Mo Guan Shan didn’t really know the reason, but the fact that He Tian was wearing a piece of clothing that wasn’t his spiked Mo Guan Shan’s curiosity. He wondered if they were from that mysterious person with that same evil aura he had seen earlier that day. He also wondered if that person was really He Tian’s father. They did look alike after all.

“It’s my brother’s.” Since Mo Guan Shan’s question was mostly harmless, He Tian settled into telling him the truth. But he did decide that if Mo Guan Shan started getting too nosy, he would have to change the subject.

“ _Oh, so he was his brother._ ” Mo Guan Shan thought, out loud. It took about five seconds for him to realize that he had actually said it.

“Huh?”

“Nothing, it doesn’t matter.” Mo Guan Shan answered hasty, hoping for his face not to get flushed with the sudden wave of embarrassment.

“So it was you at that sandwich place earlier today.”

It wasn’t a question. He Tian had seen him, he just wasn’t sure about it.

“What were **YOU** doing there anyway?” Mo Guan Shan asked defensive, bringing his walls all the way up.

“Nah, that’s not about me.” He Tian smiled, his index finger moving from side to side on a negative gesture. “Who did you think He Cheng was?”

“It’s none of your damn business.” Mo Guan Shan clicked his tongue, clearly annoyed and wanting to get away from this conversation.”

“Tell me.”

“Why?” He huffed and crossed his arms, losing interest in eating. “So you’ll have another reason to laugh at me?”

“Hey!” He Tian faked being hurt. “When have I ever laughed at you?”

“You kidding me?”

“But seriously, did you think he was my uncle or something?” That entire situation made He Tian more curious than usual.

“Worse.” Mo Guan Shan muttered. He knew he was digging his own grave, but somehow he just kept talking.

“Worse than my uncle?” He Tian thought for some seconds, when it finally hit him, he just burst off laughing. “You thought he was my dad?”

“Shut up.” With a blush creeping on his cheeks, Mo Guan Shan looked down and started eating once more, now fully ignoring He Tian. When he finally noticed He Tian getting quiet, he raised his head once more, repeating his earlier question. “But what were you doing there anyway?”

“Hmm, you probably won’t believe me if I said I was there to eat a sandwich, right?”

“You never eat sandwiches, so yeah, that’s pretty unbelievable.”

“Point taken.” He Tian took a deep breath, thinking while observing Mo Guan Shan. “I wanted to see you.” His nonchalant tone definitely was supposed to ease Mo Guan Shan’s reaction, but unfortunately it didn’t work.

Mo Guan Shan gasped and choked on the soup broth, thumping his chest and coughing, trying to catch his breath. It took him a couple minutes for his breath to normalize, and when he was able to breathe normally again, he cleaned his watery eyes and stood up, starting to collect the bowls, chopsticks and cutlery.

“Go take a shower while I clean this mess.” Mo Guan Shan mumbled, ignoring what He Tian had said completely.

He Tian thought about making a comment on Mo Guan Shan’s reaction, but he just chose to let it go and do what Mo Guan Shan told him to.

It didn’t take long for He Tian to be done with the shower and Mo Guan Shan with the dishes. As Mo Guan Shan was also dirtied with the tomato sauce, he wanted to take a shower as well, but the fact that he didn’t have any clean clothes to put on after showering made him re-think about it.

“Can I borrow a pair of sweatpants?” In the end he decided to ask for He Tian’s clothes, since it was still a better option than using his dirty ones.

“Of course you can.” He Tian answered, that mischievous smile plastered on his face. “Do you want boxers too?”

“Fuck no.”

“Uh, gonna use your dirty ones, then?”

“That’s just gross.”

“Going commando?” He Tian’s eyes glinted with some emotion unknown to Mo Guan Shan, an emotion that he really wanted to keep not knowing what it was.

“What’s it to you?” At last he snapped, walking towards He Tian’s wardrobe and grabbing the first pair of sweatpants he saw. He pretended to not hear He Tian commenting on how those were his favorites and just got inside the bathroom.

He did go commando.

After finishing his shower he grabbed his dirty clothes and put them on He Tian’s washing machine, so that way he would have clean clothes at least by the morning. Once everything was done, he walked towards He Tian’s bed, willing to tell him he was going to sleep on the couch.

“If you think I’m going to let you sleep on the couch, forget it.” He Tian said as soon as he noticed Mo Guan Shan coming closer. “Take the bed.”

“I’m not taking a sick person’s bed, especially if that sick person is you.”

“Am I that bad of a person?”

“You don’t want me to answer this question.” Mo Guan Shan said, almost feeling regretful when he saw He Tian’s expression darken. “You are a damn dick when you want to be, that’s what I mean.”

“Fair enough.” He Tian’s voice was relieved, because that was still better than Mo Guan Shan thinking he was the worst.

“So, I’m going to sleep on the couch.”

“I take that you sleeping with me on the bed is out of question.” He Tian guessed.

“Out of question.”

“Ok, fine.” When He Tian finally accepted something Mo Guan Shan said without being a jerk about it, Mo Guan Shan wanted to jump in happiness. “But can I ask you one last thing?” His tone wasn’t dangerous or mischievous, but something inside Mo Guan Shan still told him to deny it.

“What?” But his curiosity was still more powerful.

“Just sit here with me until I fall asleep.” He Tian’s voice was soft and it felt like it was something he really wanted. “I’m too tired, I won’t be awake for too long once I lie down.”

Again, every single cell in Mo Guan Shan’s body told him to say no.

“Okay.” But he insisted in going against it. “But don’t try any funny stuff or I will punch you. Again.”

“Noted.”

He Tian then finally lied down on the bed, right in the middle of it, leaving a considerably big space for Mo Guan Shan to sit. When he did it, he noticed that he wasn’t as close to He Tian as he thought he was going to be, and that made him feel at ease. He still could touch He Tian if he outstretched his hand, but he didn’t want to, so he just sat there, back straight and eyes glued to the immense windows, observing the rain that was just starting to pour.

“Why did you wanna see me?” Before he could control it, his tongue had betrayed him, and he asked the forbidden question.

“Are you gonna run away if I’m honest?” He Tian retorted, already tired of being hurt by Mo Guan Shan’s obliviousness. “Or ignore it?”

“Forget it.”

“No, Mo Guan Shan, I’m not forgetting it.” He Tian shifted on the bed, lying on his side and facing Mo Guan Shan’s back. “I just wanna come clean to you and have you face it.”

“Then tell me.” His answer was short and angry, pissed just like Mo Guan Shan always seemed to be.

“I was feeling lonely.” Even if He Tian wanted to, there was no way he could hide his sadness upon saying that.

“Lonely? You?”

“Yes, me.” He took a deep breath, choosing his next words wisely. “You might say that I have many friends, but if you think about it, they’re mostly girls who just want to hang out with me because of reasons I don’t know.”

Looks and money was what Mo Guan Shan wanted to say, but that time he was able to control his tongue.

“I live in this huge apartment alone, I rarely see my family.” Little by little He Tian’s voice became heavier and heavier.

He was telling Mo Guan Shan things that he had never told anybody before.

“And before you ask about Jian Yi and Zhan Zheng Xi, do you really think they consider me a close friend?” Mo Guan Shan could hear He Tian gulping, holding something in. “They are close friends, I’m just an acquaintance, an acquaintance that they probably wanna get rid of.”

That was some dense things He Tian was saying, and Mo Guan Shan had no idea in how to respond to it. He settled in just turning his body on the bed, one of his legs crossed under the other, now facing He Tian.

The thing He Tian was holding in, those were tears, and now Mo Guan Shan could see it clearly, even in the dimmed room.

“I know it sound cliché, cheesy, disgusting even, but you brought something to me I didn’t know I could have.”

Mo Guan Shan felt the sudden urge to touch He Tian. But he didn’t. He felt like if he did, He Tian would break.

“ _Life_.” That last word was only a whisper, but it was enough for Mo Guan Shan to feel like something was crushing him from inside out.

He felt sort of guilty because of the way he was treating He Tian, and still He Tian thought so high of him.

“And please, keep treating me the way you do.” He Tian said with a huffed laugh, still holding in. “It’s that what makes you different.”

“Did you just read my mind?”

“Your face says it all.” He commented, his hand outstretching to grab Mo Guan Shan’s. Mo Guan Shan didn’t flinch or retreated, he just let He Tian hold his hand. “Opposite to me, you can’t hide what you’re feeling, it’s pretty damn obvious just by looking at you.”

The feeling of He Tian’s hand holding his wasn’t unpleasant. It was almost like he felt that it was right, that their intertwined fingers were supposed to be like that. And because of that, Mo Guan Shan closed his own fingers around He Tian’s hand.

“I didn’t know you felt that way.” Mo Guan Shan said after a long pause. It was weird when He Tian didn’t answer him. “He Tian?”

Without a response, Mo Guan Shan started to get worried – even though he would never admit it, which made him get closer to He Tian. He Tian’s eyes were closed, and his breath was slow and steady. Apparently Mo Guan Shan had taken too long to say something, and He Tian ended up falling asleep.

Knowing that He Tian was sleeping, Mo Guan Shan took his time observing him, noticing how his features were sharp, but beautiful, and how peaceful he looked like, opposite to earlier that day. He could also notice how He Tian’s bangs fell on a weird way, partially covering his eyes.

Before he could even stop himself, Mo Guan Shan caught his free fingers adjusting He Tian’s bangs, taking them away from his eyes. He ended up cursing at himself and retreating his hand, hoping for He Tian to not wake up. Mo Guan Shan didn’t want another reason to be teased about.

His heart was thumping inside his chest and he couldn’t understand what he was feeling, but he could understand something else.

“ _You do like me, don’t you?_ ” Mo Guan Shan whispered to the sleeping He Tian, knowing that he wouldn’t hear or answer.

He Tian wasn’t sleeping, though.

Once more he was wondering how Mo Guan Shan would react once he was sure He Tian wasn’t aware of what he was doing, and his actions were even more surprising than what He Tian had first predicted.

Those words made He Tian ponder if Mo Guan Shan was really that oblivious, since it was clear for everybody else how much He Tian liked him, or if he was just playing with He Tian’s feelings. Also, He Tian wanted to jump on him and kiss him, but that would mean he would discover He Tian was actually awake, and that wouldn’t result on a good thing.

In the end He Tian did nothing at all. He just kept lying down on the bed, feeling now a bolder Mo Guan Shan outline his cheek and jaw, the soft and meekly touches slowly lulling him to sleep.

That night, He Tian didn’t have any nightmares.


	2. Gratitude

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He Tian is grateful, but Mo Guan Shan is a bitch.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After thinking better about this fanfiction, I realized I couldn't finish everything in only two chapters, so we're having five.
> 
> Here's the second one, enjoy~

When He Tian woke up in the following morning, Mo Guan Shan wasn’t there anymore.

At first he wanted to curse at Mo Guan Shan, because he was sure Mo Guan Shan had ditched him and went home as soon as he had fallen asleep. But once he got up from the bed and stretched his limbs, he noticed a faint smell of food in the apartment, like it was fresh-made. Still kind of sleep-drunk, He Tian walked to the kitchen, finding breakfast ready and a little note beside it.

“ _You still look like shit, I made you breakfast._ ”

Even though the message was short and rude, He Tian could still feel some sort of sweetness and care behind it. Not only Mo Guan Shan had stayed until morning, but he also checked on He Tian when he woke up, making him breakfast when he noticed He Tian needed something healthier than take-out to eat.

Just as usual, the food was delicious. He Tian was already feeling much better than he was on the previous day, but it seemed like the food was just the last boost he needed.

After eating, He Tian decided to take a quick shower. He had woken up a little bit sweaty, the last traces of his cold still wearing out. When he finished doing everything, he finally left home and went to school.

As he got nearer the school, he started noticing some well-known faces over here and over there. A couple of his fangirls walking together and giggling about something he pretended to care when they told him. Jian Yi and Zhan Zheng Xi, walking side by side, looking a little awkward compared to what they were usually like. She Li, who surprisingly hadn’t quit school yet. The guy with the buzzcut, who was talking excitedly with a redhead.

Redhead.

He Tian laughed to himself and made a straight path towards the duo, dodging all the girls who tried to approach him in the way. In a few seconds he had his arm around Mo Guan Shan’s neck, feeling slightly surprised when Mo Guan Shan didn’t get as near as startled as He Tian thought he would.

“You ditched me this morning.” He Tian said low, but still loud enough so Mo Guan Shan’s friend would hear it too.

“My bag was at home.” Mo Guan Shan grumbled, it was clear he didn’t want his friend listening to this conversation.

“I felt betrayed when I woke up and you weren’t there anymore.” He Tian faked being hurt, his mocking tone making Mo Guan Shan want to punch him in the face.

“Stop being so dramatic.” And again, Mo Guan Shan rolled his eyes. “And stop fucking touching me.”

“You weren’t complaining about it last night.” He Tian’s eyes glinted with mischief, and he wanted to laugh at Mo Guan Shan’s friend’s eyes growing big, probably having  a hard time believing He Tian’s words.

“Dickhead.” Mo Guan Shan spat. After shaking his head and taking a deep breath, he finally made He Tian let go of him and walked towards the school building fast, ignoring the fact that He Tian would probably follow him soon.

“What’s your relationship with the boss?” The buzzcut friend asked as soon as Mo Guan Shan wasn’t able to hear them.

“I wonder.” He Tian inquired, and with a snarky smirk, he completed. “He did make me breakfast this morning, though.”

He Tian didn’t let the buzzcut boy make any other questions, and soon he was trailing after Mo Guan Shan. He kept bothering Mo Guan Shan, telling him how he was feeling better thanks to Mo Guan Shan, or how the breakfast he made was tasty, or even how he loved the way Mo Guan Shan cared about him.

Mo Guan Shan just wanted to hide in a hole and never get out of it, especially when He Tian decided talking a little bit louder than usual about everything. In the end he just covered He Tian’s mouth with his hand and told him to shut the fuck up, running to his own classroom as soon as he could.

After Mo Guan Shan ran away, He Tian decided that he could let Mo Guan Shan go, at least for that time, as he could keep on bothering his red ball of fluff on the break. Because of that, He Tian ended up going to class, being soon surrounded by a horde of curious girls, asking him the reason behind his absence, and about things they overheard in the corridor.

Even though He Tian actually wanted to leave Mo Guan Shan’s name out of the conversation, at least to protect him from the harassment He Tian basically went through every day, the girls were way smarter than he first previewed. Of course his comments in the morning were fuel to their fire, but He Tian decided to just overlook that detail and focus on what was more obvious.

“That redhead made you breakfast?” One of the girls asked, her usual squeaky tone now lower and more serious. “Are you sure it wasn’t poisoned?”

“Poisoned?” He Tian wanted to laugh at those girls conspiracy theory, but he settled for the confusion look. “Why would he poison me?”

“Because he doesn’t like you, of course.” Another one said as it was the most obvious thing in the world.

At that moment, He Tian wanted to seriously shout at the girls to leave him alone for the rest of the day. One thing was having the feeling that Mo Guan Shan didn’t like him. Another thing was having Mo Guan Shan hurting his feelings over and over, only to treat him nicely when he thought He Tian was sleeping. But a whole different last thing was having an outsider tell him that Mo Guan Shan didn’t like him. He Tian didn’t really know why, but it seemed like the things were more real like that.

“Little Mo is like that to everybody.” He Tian brushed it off with a fake laugh. “He seems like all spikes, but deep down he’s a nice person.”

“That delinquent?” A third girl said. “But I heard that he ra-”

But before she could continue, He Tian slammed his hand on the table and got up, looking at the girl dead in the eyes, with an extremely unfriendly expression on his face. He got closer to her, making her flinch and the other girls widen their eyes in the process.

“Don’t you ever say that again.” His menacing tone was enough to make the girl’s eyes water and her body shiver. “Mo Guan Shan was framed that day.”

That was enough to make all the girls swallow the lumps that formed on their throats and understand that He Tian wasn’t in the mood for talking anymore. He could even hear one of the girls telling the other one that she should think before opening her mouth, that she talked too much. He Tian agreed. Soon all the girls were gone and the bell rang, and all He Tian could do was pretend he was paying attention to class, just wishing for the next break to come by faster.

It didn’t.

After what seemed like an eternity and a half, it was finally the lunch break. He Tian tried to get away from the girls on the previous break, but they cornered him, telling him that they were sorry about their comments earlier that day. He Tian said that it was ok, but that they shouldn’t say that ever again, but before he could get away from their grasp, the girls found yet another thing to keep his attention on them.

But finally it was lunch break. His last class finished a little bit earlier, so He Tian was able to run and hide from the girls before they could even appear, giving him a head-start. Soon he saw himself standing in front of Mo Guan Shan’s classroom. But instead of running to him, He Tian changed his path and went for one of the desks in the front of the class.

There was sitting a small girl with short dark hair and glasses, clearly minding her own business, without really caring to what was happening around her. She was organizing a few papers, what looked like documents, making a neat and organized pile with them. He Tian then put on his best smile and walked towards her, half-sitting on her desk as soon as he reached it.

“I heard that you are this class’ president.”

“It’s against the rules sitting on desks.” She replied, her tone almost robotic while she adjusted her glasses. Once she realized the person wouldn’t move, she raised her head. “Student He Tian.”

“You know me, I’m flattered.” He Tian leaned his body a little bit forward, getting closer to the girl.

“Get out of my desk.” She ordered. For a second He Tian wondered if that girl was that strict with everybody. “What brings you here?”

“I need a favor.”

From where Mo Guan Shan was sitting, all the way in the back of the classroom, he couldn’t really pick up the conversation. All Mo Guan Shan could see was He Tian using his lady-killer smiles with the super strict class president, and noticing that slowly it was working and her shoulders were gradually relaxing. He also noticed how He Tian brought his hand near her face, and how he touched her hair lightly, with what almost looked like care.

At the same time as He Tian got closer to the girl, Mo Guan Shan started feeling something tightening inside of him. But before he could become aware of what was happening, he just stood up and left the classroom, thumping more than usual. Mo Guan Shan did bump into a few people in the corridors, but he didn’t care, all he wanted at that moment was a sandwich and solitude.

His moment of solitude didn’t last long, though, and soon he noticed someone sitting beside him. He Tian had his hands on the grass and looked upwards, not really saying anything. Mo Guan Shan felt the urge to ask He Tian what he wanted with the class president, but he knew he would probably get a snarky response, so he just settled in keep eating his sandwich.

“Won’t you ask me what I was talking to the class president?” Surprisingly, He Tian was the one to actually say it.

Mo Guan Shan pondered answers he could give. He could be rude, he could be curious or he could ne nonchalant. He settled with being truthful to his nature and said what He Tian was probably waiting for him to say.

“None of my business.” His mouth was still half full, which made his words sound muffled, but he didn’t care.

“So cold, oh my.” He Tian laughed. “Are you really not curious at all?”

He was, but he would never admit.

“Do I look like I’m curious?” And there it was, the rude tone and impolite words Mo Guan Shan was best known for.

And slowly, He Tian’s patience started to run out. All he wanted was to get Mo Guan Shan more interested in whatever he was doing. But either Mo Guan Shan was a tough nut to crack, or he just really didn’t care at all. In the end, he just sighed louder than usual and stood up, leaving Mo Guan Shan alone without even saying a word.

At first, Mo Guan Shan thought he would feel relieved as soon as He Tian walked away.

He actually felt uneasy.

That uneasiness followed him the whole day.

Each break he thought he would see He Tian coming by to annoy him, but he didn’t. At the end of the classes he caught himself wanting He Tian to surprise him by the school gates, hugging his neck and dragging Mo Guan Shan to his home. Yet again, He Tian didn’t.

Lastly, all Mo Guan Shan could do was tame those annoying new found feelings and let it go, trying to feel at ease because he was finally getting a break from all He Tian’s bullshit, especially all the harassment.

-

When Mo Guan Shan woke up in the following morning, he thought that uneasiness would finally let go of him. But when He Tian didn’t appear before class, or when He Tian didn’t appear during the first break, the only thing that happened to the uneasiness, was it to grow.

But it was only when the bell announced lunchtime that Mo Guan Shan allowed himself to actually do something. And so, for the first time since He Tian became a common appearance in his life, Mo Guan Shan saw himself being the one going after the other. After all this time getting used to be the one being sought, he was now the one seeking.

It didn’t take long for Mo Guan Shan to find He Tian. He just needed to search for an amalgamation of loud and giggly girls, and that was something easy to find. Just as he had thought, there was He Tian, all smiles and laugh, talking carefree about something Mo Guan Shan couldn’t hear and all over him, there were at least ten girls.

Mo Guan Shan didn’t get near, he didn’t need to. He just waited there, in the middle of the corridor, for He Tian to notice him. And after only a couple minutes, He Tian did notice Mo Guan Shan’s intense gaze on him. A sudden wave of what seemed like relief drowned Mo Guan Shan when He Tian looked at him and smiled. But then the uneasiness came back twice as hard when He Tian turned his head back to the girls, ignoring Mo Guan Shan completely.

If someone asked Mo Guan Shan what he was feeling, he probably wouldn’t be able to explain it. His head was full of confusion and a hint of what could only be understood as sadness, and he couldn’t stop himself from thinking the worst.

Words like ‘it was obvious he would get bored soon’ or ‘and you believed him when he said he was lonely’ and even ‘now you know your place’ poisoned his mind, tightening the knot on his chest even further.

His pride screamed, shouting how Mo Guan Shan should walk all the way over there and punch He Tian right across his face, showing him who was the real boss. But the only place Mo Guan Shan’s legs were willing to go was as far away from there as he could. And with his short bangs doing nothing to cover his red and wet eyes and his head looking down that was what Mo Guan Shan did.

He didn’t understand why, but he felt betrayed.

It was like everything He Tian had said and done were nothing but blatant lies.

And Mo Guan Shan had to confess, He Tian was a hell of an actor.

“Hey! Boss!” He heard a faint voice of someone calling out for him, but he just ignored it and kept walking away. It was only when a hand stopped him that he looked at the voice’s owner, Buzzcut. “I’m talking to you.”

“What do you want?” Mo Guan Shan was trying to sound rude, but he actually just sounded drained.

“You’re off today.” Buzzcut said it with concern. “Last time you were off, things didn’t go so well.”

“What’s it to you?” When one person finally stopped meddling with Mo Guan Shan’s business, there was another one to take their place.

“I’m just worried.” He shrugged. “I don’t want you to get in trouble, none of us want.”

“As if the others don’t wanna get rid of me.” Mo Guan Shan chuckled. Something about this resembled the situation he was with He Tian a couple days prior.

“Don’t say nonsense.” Buzzcut assured. “Come on, what got you gloomy today?”

“I’m not gloomy!” Mo Guan Shan’s scowl deepened and he scoffed at buzzcut.

“I’ll let it through this time.” Buzzcut laughed. “But tell me, that dude He Tian hasn’t bothered you today.”

“Oh, yeah.” Mo Guan Shan confirmed. “Thankfully.” He added just for a good matter.

That seemed to be enough to send buzzcut away. And even though Mo Guan Shan trusted his friend and underling, and deep inside he wanted to pull him back and talk about everything that had been bothering him, Mo Guan Shan just let buzzcut go and went back to his own class.

Little by little as the time passed by, Mo Guan Shan could feel his chest tighter and tighter. The feeling was almost unbearable when the bell announcing the end of the classes rang and Mo Guan Shan saw himself finally free from that place that was choking him.

Or at least that was what he thought, until he saw the class president walking towards his desk.

“As you might have already seen, we had to do some late changes on the clean duty schedule.” Her voice was soft, but her tone was strict. She didn’t like Mo Guan Shan and everybody could see it.

“I actually didn’t.”

“I had to change your day, so I hope you don’t mind.” Even though she was sounding polite, Mo Guan Shan could still sense the venom behind her words.

“Why would I?” He asked, his eyebrow already twitching, since it was clear what was coming next.

“Because you are on clean duty today.” Her delighted smile was the cherry on the top. She was not only doing that on purpose, but she was also liking it. Maybe it was revenge because of that time Mo Guan Shan shouted at her? He didn’t know.

Mo Guan Shan thought about shouting at her again, fighting it back, denying with all his might. But he knew it wouldn’t be worth the effort, since her decision was most likely final and she didn’t care about his opinion. It was not like Mo Guan Shan’s day was going well either, it was already ruined, so what was one more bad thing happening?

At the end Mo Guan Shan decided for the easiest path. Acceptance.

He didn’t say a word to the class president. He just nodded, got up and went to the broom closet. Sooner he started it, sooner he could go home.

In the end he actually took double the time to finish cleaning the classroom and taking out the trash, since his clean partner had ditched him in the first five minutes using a very lame excuse. As Mo Guan Shan wasn’t putting up a fight that day, he just let the boy go and did everything on his own. At least it was good to occupy his mind with something else.

So after long thirty minutes, Mo Guan Shan saw himself free from all of his duties and finally crossing the school gates. It was already late, so he was the only one leaving, and thanks to that he could have some peace before getting home. Or at least was what he tried, but his mind was up to no good and kept thinking in all the bad scenarios that could have happened so He Tian would ignore him that day.

Half of Mo Guan Shan wanted to punch himself right in the gut, as he couldn’t just stop thinking about He Tian, and his other half wanted to punch He Tian, as he was the reason why Mo Guan Shan’s mind was so uneasy that day. Since none of the options sounded good, Mo Guan Shan just brushed it off while shaking his head and proceeded to walk faster towards his house.

What Mo Guan Shan surely wasn’t expecting when he got home, however, was to see the same person who had caused him so many headaches that day, sitting so carefree on his couch, having a friendly conversation with his mom while drinking his tea.

But after a whole day wondering why He Tian was ignoring him, all Mo Guan Shan wanted was to make He Tian swallow that smug smile of his. He definitely wasn’t feeling like dealing with He Tian, not on that particular day, after all those particular circumstances.

“What is he doing here?” Mo Guan Shan asked his mother, refusing to look He Tian.

“Guan Shan.” She said with her usual sweet and caring tone. “Student He Tian wanted to see you.” Mo Guan Shan could see her fixing another mug of tea, probably for him. “He’s been waiting for a while, you know?” She smiled fondly, bringing the mug to Mo Guan Shan. “What took you so long? I was starting to get worried.”

“Mom…” Mo Guan Shan took the mug his mother offered, his eyes fixed on the wooden floor beneath them. “I don’t wanna deal with him today.” He said low, trying to prevent He Tian from listening him. “Not today, please.” And lastly he finally let his gloomy self appear.

“What’s wrong?” She asked concerned, her palm outstretching to touch Mo Guan Shan’s face. “You know you can count on mom, right?”

“Yes, I know.” He nodded his head softly. “I’ll go to my room, can you please send him off?”

“Sure.” Her tone was assuring, understanding. “If that’s what you want.”

Mo Guan Shan smiled to his mom in a mute thanks and walked towards his room. He didn’t notice that the door he usually left open was closed, Mo Guan Shan wasn’t paying attention to such small details that day. So he just took a last look to the kitchen, averting his gaze as soon as He Tian’s eyes fixed on his, before opening his bedroom door.

When he finally did it, Mo Guan Shan had to gather all his strength to not drop the tea mug on the floor, so surprised he was.

In the middle of the room, leaning against its support, there was a beautiful creamy yellow guitar. The same one he was looking at longingly just a few days prior.

Mo Guan Shan felt all his blood rush to his face.

Not in embarrassment, but in anger.

He stormed out of his bedroom and went back to the kitchen, fast enough to catch He Tian standing up and saying goodbye to his mother. Quickly, Mo Guan Shan grabbed He Tian by the wrist and dragged him to his bedroom, closing the door behind them right afterwards. He also pretended not to hear his mother say ‘I hope you can sort it out’ from the other side.

“What the fuck is this?” He spat, his pointing finger shaking with rage.

“I do recall telling you I’d pay you ten times.” He Tian answered as it was nothing.

“You…” Mo Guan Shan started on a menacing tone, but soon bit his tongue, choosing his words better. “I took care of you because I wanted to.”

“Why so?” He Tian poked. “As far as I know you don’t just do things outta of the goodness in your heart.”

“And you are right.” Mo Guan Shan, to He Tian’s surprise, confirmed. “I was paying my debt with you.”

“What debt?”

“Don’t play dumb, He Tian.” Mo Guan Shan put the mug on his desk and dropped his bag on the floor, sitting on his bed right afterwards. “You’ve done things for me.”

“I didn’t want you to pay be back, though.” He Tian argued.

“Yeah, you didn’t.” Mo Guan Shan’s heavy breathing showed how nervous his was, and also how much he was controlling himself. “But I felt like I needed to.” His hands flew to his hair, messing his short red strands. “I can’t accept this, I can’t owe you anymore.”

When Mo Guan Shan looked up, he noticed He Tian had given up on putting one of his many masks, and now was just looking at Mo Guan Shan as he had been trespassed by a knife. To say the least, He Tian was offended by Mo Guan Shan’s words, even though both of them knew that the best suitable word was probably hurt.

“Is that what you think this is?” He Tian kneeled in front of Mo Guan Shan, looking him deep in the eyes. “Do you think this is just a way of keeping you tied to me, no matter what?”

Mo Guan Shan was speechless, he didn’t know how to answer this question. His silence only opened more windows for He Tian.

“Do you really think I’m such a bother?” He Tian’s words were heavy, just like they were at the previous night. “Do you really want to get rid of me that much?”

He Tian then got up from the floor and walked to the door, but he was stopped before he could turn the knob. Mo Guan Shan was holding his wrist tight, and He Tian could feel how cold his hands were.

“I thought I wanted to.” Mo Guan Shan whispered, his eyes again focused on the wooden floor. “I thought things would get better if we weren’t familiar.”

Slowly, He Tian turned around. The grip on his wrist getting lighter until Mo Guan Shan finally let go. He Tian wanted to ask a thousand questions, but he wouldn’t dare to say a word until he was sure Mo Guan Shan had said everything he wanted.

“They didn’t.” Mo Guan Shan’s voice got louder gradually, and soon he was using his usual tone. “It was weird.”

“What was weird?”

“Today.”

Deep down, He Tian knew that was the most he would be able to make Mo Guan Shan confess. He had ignored Mo Guan Shan on purpose, but He Tian had never thought it would work so well. He was glad that even still in denial, Mo Guan Shan could be so honest with his own feelings.

“I wanted to show you how I feel when you push me away.” He Tian confessed, his right hand going towards Mo Guan Shan’s head, patting his hair carefully. “I didn’t expect it to actually work, though.”

And finally there it was, the usual grumpy Mo Guan Shan, wailing his arms and trying to get out of his touch, shouting curses and blaming He Tian for everything that had ever happened on his life.

“You are a huge pile of shit!” He spat, his closed hands punching He Tian’s chest. “You fucking did that on purpose, you dick!”

He Tian only laughed, keeping his own thoughts of how Mo Guan Shan was cute to himself. His hand, though, it kept touching Mo Guan Shan’s head, his circling movements now trying to soothe the angry boy. Damn, Mo Guan Shan did look like a cat sometimes, all hisses and claws.

“Let go of my hair.” Mo Guan Shan said annoyed, tired of punching He Tian. He was now busy trying to get away from He Tian’s insistent touch on his head.

“Nah, I like it.” He Tian denied, as suspected, his hand still caressing the back of Mo Guan Shan’s head and his nape carefully.

“Why?”

“It feels nice.” He Tian’s answer was unexpected, as Mo Guan Shan was waiting for something in the lines of ‘I love pissing you off’ or something like that. “My hair was never short like this, so I didn’t know how it felt like.”

“…”

“It’s soft, and fuzzy, I could get addicted to this very easily.”

“Let go.” Mo Guan Shan asked, now less angry and more aware of the events. He Tian said he could get addicted to the feeling of patting Mo Guan Shan, but Mo Guan Shan knew he also could get addicted to the feeling of being pat.

“I’ll let go in one condition.” He Tian moved a step closer, invading more of Mo Guan Shan’s personal space. “Keep the guitar.”

“I can’t.” Mo Guan Shan retorted for the umpteenth time. He Tian was being pushy and he was having a hard time controlling his own body not to lean into the touch, but as time passed, it was becoming a harder and harder task.

“You can.” He Tian took the opportunity to take his free hand and grab Mo Guan Shan’s. “Just pretend it’s a birthday present. No harm in that, right?”

“Except you don’t know when my birthday is.” Mo Guan Shan let himself be guided by He Tian, his now taken hand being placed on the arm of the guitar.

“Details, Little Mo.”

“He Tian…” He wanted to keep denying, his pride screamed that he had to deny.

“Please.”

But He Tian never asked anything politely, and that was the last straw. At last Mo Guan Shan gave in to He Tian and accepted the guitar. Later on they left his room, surprising Mo Guan Shan’s mom with the fact that He Tian would indeed stay for dinner, which made the woman beaming in happiness, as it was clear the boys had made up from whatever fight they had.

He Tian asked embarrassing questions about Mo Guan Shan’s childhood, each one was answered with a story from Mo Guan Shan’s mother. Mo Guan Shan knew he had to get in the middle and stop them, that they were going too far and He Tian was only getting more fuel for his teasing, but all Mo Guan Shan could think of was how it was amazing how much He Tian paid attention to him.

After having dinner, He Tian denied Mo Guan Shan’s mother offer of spending the night, to Mo Guan Shan’s relief, and actually went back home, having Mo Guan Shan as his company up until the street corner.

It was already late and there weren’t many people nearby, and Mo Guan Shan said it was the only reason why, before saying goodbye, he pulled He Tian closer, circling his arms around He Tian’s shoulders and whispering an almost soundless ‘thank you’.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stay tuned for the next chapters.
> 
> Pops's out~


	3. Confusion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He Tian is affectionate and Mo Guan Shan doesn't know how to deal with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Three things before the chapter:
> 
> 1 - Mo Guan Shan is left handed, and there are many things throughout the manhua that prove it.
> 
> 2 - Slow burn = the best burn.
> 
> 3 - Please don't kill me.
> 
> Now, onto the chapter you all go~

When realization hit Mo Guan Shan and he noticed that he was hugging He Tian, his body jolted and he pushed He Tian away harshly. Inwardly he prayed for all known gods that He Tian hadn’t seen how red his face was, because it sure would only add more fuel to He Tian’s daily teasing.

As soon as he closed the front door behind him, Mo Guan Shan finally let himself calm down, feeling his heartbeat thumping against his ribcage as his face color returned to normal. He thanked that his mother was already in her bedroom, because it would certainly be uncomfortable to tell her the reason behind his disheveled appearance.

After taking a few deep breaths and calming his heartbeat, Mo Guan Shan finally locked the door and walked to the kitchen, grabbing a cold glass of water and gulping all down in one go. Soon he went to the bathroom, as He Tian’s arrival prevented him from taking a shower.

He didn’t take long to finish showering and after a few minutes Mo Guan Shan was already in his bedroom, sitting on his bed as he dried his wet hair. His eyes analyzed the guitar, still amazed on how He Tian had bought the exact one he wanted. Shutting his inner demons up, Mo Guan Shan grabbed the guitar, feeling how much lighter than he thought it was, and how nice it felt to hold it.

Mo Guan Shan was totally aware of how much he was smiling as his right hand traced a few chords he still remembered from those guitar lessons so many years ago. He tried ignoring the fuzzy feeling inside of him, but it was almost impossible to deny it. That guitar could be considered a pity present, or something to tie Mo Guan Shan up to He Tian, but in the end Mo Guan Shan just decided to forget about everything his inner demons whispered in his ear, and focused on what would make him happier.

At that right moment, what would make him happier was definitely to play some dumb song he learned a long time ago, but as he didn’t want to disturb the neighborhood, he just settled in keep trying different chords to see what he could still remember.

Mo Guan Shan’s hype didn’t last for too long, though, as his admiration was interrupted by the annoying ringing of his cellphone. He wanted to throw his mobile away, since it surely would bring him peace, but as soon as he saw the name on the screen, he couldn’t ignore it, as much as he wanted to.

“ _I’m home.”_ The message said. It was He Tian.

Mo Guan Shan really wanted to answer it with something like ‘I don’t care’, but in the end he settled with:

“ _How did you know?_ ” Which was a message that didn’t need much explanation, Mo Guan Shan knew He Tian would understand.

“ _I saw you looking at it the other day._ ”

“ _No._ ” Mo Guan Shan replied, since that was not what he meant exactly. “ _How did you know which one?_ ”

He was hoping for He Tian to say it was a lucky guess.

“ _I just pay attention to you._ ” Mo Guan Shan just ignored the sudden tightened he felt on his heart, telling himself that everything was still normal and he wasn’t flustered by He Tian’s words.

Blatant lies he told himself.

“ _When are you gonna play something to me?_ ” He Tian sent another message when Mo Guan Shan didn’t say anything for too long.

“ _What makes you think I will?_ ” Mo Guan Shan had to be truthful to his actions so far, even though his heart said otherwise.

“ _Well…_ ” He Tian sent and Mo Guan Shan saw that he was writing something else.

And erasing.

And writing again.

And erasing.

“ _Well?_ ”

“ _Got you curious, huh?_ ” He Tian teased. “ _I just gotta improve my convincing skills._ ”

“ _So you’re gonna beat me up until I give in, how original_.” Mo Guan Shan rolled his eyes, not really noticing that he had gotten more comfortable on his bed, or the subtle smile on his lips.

“ _It is fun beating you up, but I think I’m gonna do something else this time._ ”

“Dick.” Mo Guan Shan muttered out loud, typing another message right after. “ _What are you gonna do, then?_ ”

“ _It’s a secret._ ” It was almost like Mo Guan Shan could see He Tian’s smug grin through the phone screen.

Another few minutes of silence followed, until Mo Guan Shan’s phone rang with another message from He Tian.

“ _It’s late, you should go to sleep._ ”

“ _So do you._ ”

And again, He Tian started typing something, stopped and erased.

“ _What is it_?” Mo Guan Shan asked.

“ _Nothing…_ ” His reply was fast. “ _It’s dumb._ ”

Mo Guan Shan thought about pressing He Tian so he would talk, but he knew it would happen neither fast nor easily, so in the end Mo Guan Shan just decided to do what He Tian told him to.

“ _Whatever then, don’t talk if you don’t want to._ ” He sent. “ _I’m gonna sleep now, don’t bother me anymore._ ”

“ _Sleep well, see you tomorrow_.”

He didn’t bother to answer He Tian’s message, and just locked his phone, throwing it beside the pillow. Mo Guan Shan put the guitar back on its support and turned off the lights, lying down to sleep right afterwards. He closed his eyes and felt the drowsiness, but somehow he just couldn’t fall asleep.

Mo Guan Shan turned to one side, then to the other, lied on his back and on his front, but all the positions seemed uncomfortable. A few more minutes passed with Mo Guan Shan trying to force himself to sleep, and still he was wide awake. His mind didn’t want to cooperate and all he could do was replay that day events over and over, like a broken record.

All those memories started making him become more and more nervous, as he felt his body tired but couldn’t rest. He just wanted his mind to settle down and let him go to sleep, but it wouldn’t. In the end he grabbed his phone and opened the message app, wondering if He Tian was still awake.

However, before he could type anything, he realized what he was doing, and his response was practically automatic. Mo Guan Shan threw his phone away, not really caring if the noise would wake his mother up. With his heart thumping inside his chest for the second time that day, Mo Guan Shan stood up and picked the phone up, almost having a heart attack when it rang on his hand.

Again, it was He Tian.

“How dare you disturb my sleep?” He knew he was lying, but he hoped his irritated tone didn’t give him away.

He Tian didn’t say anything, and all Mo Guan Shan could hear was a light sigh. Somehow he knew He Tian was going to hang up, he had done something like this before.

“Wait.” He whispered, now hearing He Tian’s breathing closer. “Why did you call me?”

For some unknown reason, Mo Guan Shan wanted He Tian to understand that his question was not only about that day in special, but the previous time He Tian had called him in the middle of the night as well.

“ _I-I…_ ” He Tian stuttered. “ _It’s dumb._ ”

“It’s the second time you tell me that, He Tian.” Mo Guan Shan overflowed frustration. “Are you afraid or something?”

“ _Yes._ ” He Tian’s tone was low and uncertain. “ _I don’t want to scare you._ ”

“Do you think I’m a coward?” His eyebrow twitched, and even in his dark room someone would be able to see his deep scowl.

“ _That’s not it._ ” He Tian sighed a second time. “ _I just wanted to hear your voice, that’s all, no big deal._ ”

No big deal, he said, but Mo Guan Shan’s heart said otherwise. Its beat increased considerably and he could feel his palms getting sweaty, but he had to answer and he couldn’t stutter, or else He Tian would notice his flustered state.

“Why?” He managed to say in a softer tone he planned, but it was still better than nothing.

“ _To see if you were ok._ ” He Tian’s answer didn’t make sense do Mo Guan Shan. Of course he was ok, and He Tian was well aware of it.

Unless something happened on his way home.

“What’s going on?” Mo Guan Shan asked confused. “You were talking to me just an hour ago, you know I’m ok.”

“ _As I said_.” He Tian chuckled, it didn’t sound amused, though, but actually sad. “ _It’s dumb._ ”

It wasn’t and Mo Guan Shan knew it.

However, as he remembered events from the previous days, it didn’t take long for the coin to drop.

“Did you have a nightmare?”

“ _Ho-_ ” And for the first time, Mo Guan Shan was the one to leave He Tian speechless. “ _How did you know?_ ”

“You are probably running a fever right now.” Mo Guan Shan explained. “Back when I was at your place you had a fever and when you slept, it was clear those dreams you were having weren’t pleasant.”

“ _You pay attention too, huh._ ” He Tian commented on a mocking tone. “ _Thank you._ ” But soon he was back to the serious one.

Mo Guan Shan didn’t agree nor deny.

“Take the medicine I left on your nightstand, drink a lot of water and go back to sleep. You need to rest.”

“ _I will._ ” He Tian answered, his voice now calmer. “ _But if something happens, call me._ ”

“Ok.” He said, even though it wasn’t necessarily true. “Goodnight.”

Mo Guan Shan hung up after he heard the deep ‘goodnight’ He Tian said in response. He couldn’t explain the reason, but as soon as he lied down on his bed and closed his eyes, he was dragged to dream land.

The following day was a Thursday.

Although Mo Guan Shan had slept fairly well, as he had slept too late, he couldn’t help but to have bags under his eyes. Even after washing his face, brushing his teeth and changing clothes, Mo Guan Shan still looked tired.

He chose not to care about this; it wasn’t like he looked good anyway, so it wouldn’t kill him to look worse one day. Mo Guan Shan also ignored his mother’s comments about how tired he looked, asking him if he didn’t want to take the day off. Although that seemed like a good idea, something inside of Mo Guan Shan told him not to.

So after eating his breakfast and chatting a little bit with his mother, Mo Guan Shan left his house and went to school. He had left home earlier than usual, so the way wasn’t as crowded as it usually was when he got to school, and that was soothing. But soon his calm morning was turned upside down.

“Hey boss, you look tired.” Buzzcut commented as he approached Mo Guan Shan. “Had trouble sleeping?”

Mo Guan Shan was about to answer with rudeness when that well-known arm hooked around his neck.

“Thinking about me?” And there is was, He Tian’s snarky tone.

“In your dreams.” Mo Guan Shan rolled his eyes, trying to ignore the blush that crept on his ears.

He Tian only laughed at Mo Guan Shan’s comment, amused with how he was still trying to deny things that were so obvious. In the end both of them left the poor buzzcut boy talking to himself and completely confused about what was happening, as they walked together to Mo Guan Shan’s classroom.

The first few classes went by slowly, the teachers were preparing them for the upcoming mock tests on the following week. He Tian didn’t come to find Mo Guan Shan during the first break, but that didn’t make Mo Guan Shan uneasy. He knew He Tian had probably been caught by the girls and couldn’t get away from them, and it wasn’t Mo Guan Shan who would get in the middle of the crazy girls’ way.

At lunchtime, however, He Tian did appear. He entered the classroom as it was his and threw Mo Guan Shan a small triangular package, which Mo Guan Shan found out to be a sandwich when he caught it. Without any cheese. Mo Guan Shan only shook his head, feeling his scowl soften just a small bit as he opened the package and bit the sandwich.

“Whoa, not gonna throw it on the ground and tell me that you’re gonna screw me and my whole family?” He Tian mocked as he came closer and sat on Mo Guan Shan’s desk.

“Well, if you keep annoying me…” Mo Guan Shan decided to just go with the flow and play along with He Tian.

“Look at you, I didn’t know you could joke.” He Tian laughed in amusement, outstretching his hand to touch the back of Mo Guan Shan’s head.

“You don’t know many things, He Tian.” Mo Guan Shan said cheeky, both eyebrows being raised on a hinting note. He then stood up, getting away from He Tian’s touch, and left the classroom. “You coming?”

“Sure.” He Tian smiled suspicious, intrigued with Mo Guan Shan’s previous words. After hooking up his arm around Mo Guan Shan’s neck, just as usual, he wondered where they were going.

“You sure are touchy-feely, huh.” Mo Guan Shan said, looking through the windows and down at the courtyard. “It’s bothersome, did you know that?”

“Yep.” He Tian answered. “I don’t really care, though.”

“Figured.” Mo Guan Shan shrugged, now looking at He Tian.

His staring didn’t take long, because as soon as He Tian noticed a pair of eyes on him, he looked back. Mo Guan Shan barely had time to look away, embarrassed of being caught observing He Tian so bluntly. The blush that crept on his ears earlier that day came back and he decided to focus on his path to the cafeteria.

When they finally got there, Mo Guan Shan managed to get away from He Tian’s touch for at least five minutes and went to the vending machine, buying a bottle of juice. Soon he was being hugged by He Tian once more, and they walked towards the courtyard.

“Do you have something to do today?” He Tian asked nonchalant, almost like he was testing the waters.

“Do you care?” Mo Guan Shan said with a low chuckle, sitting on one of the court benches. He waited for He Tian to sit by his side, and soon it happened. “Not like you’ve ever asked that.”

“I’m trying to be nice.” He Tian explained, his back now leaning on the bench and his hand terribly close to Mo Guan Shan’s. “Do you?”

Mo Guan Shan could lie and get away from He Tian’s grasp, but it was already too late.

He Tian had already put his hand over Mo Guan Shan’s.

And he wasn’t getting away from it.

 _It’s just a light touch_ , he told himself. _He’s just playing with my fingers_ , he tried to convince himself. _There’s no meaning behind it_ , he fooled himself.

“Not really.” He shrugged. His fingers warm with the pleasant pressure.

“Then let’s go watch a movie after class.” He Tian offered, his hand now going up Mo Guan Shan’s wrist and then coming back down again, but his fingers touching Mo Guan Shan’s palm as they were feathers, so light it was.

Mo Guan Shan knew he had to deny.

Mo Guan Shan knew he had to retrieve his hand.

Mo Guan Shan knew he couldn’t give He Tian’s hand more space.

Mo Guan Shan knew he couldn’t intertwine his fingers with He Tian’s.

Yet, he did.

“Okay.” His voice was low and it wavered, but Mo Guan Shan would deny that happened up until the day he died.

Soon after that the first bell rang, Mo Guan Shan saw He Tian going away, his now cold hands missing the warmth of He Tian’s. After a hard time trying to calm his thumping heart down and the second bell ringing, announcing he was already late for class, Mo Guan Shan ran to his classroom, doing his best to actually pay attention to class – a thing he usually never did.

For the first time that day, second time that week, Mo Guan Shan tried to do something else so his inner demons would stop babbling on his ear. _It’s a date_ , they would say. _You were holding hands and now you’re going on a date_ , they would insist. Mo Guan Shan thought he was at the edge of losing it when his teacher announced a surprise test, and for the first time Mo Guan Shan felt glad he had a test, it was something to keep his mind busy.

His peace didn’t last for too long, though, as images from the lunch break would replay in his mind, and as his left hand would tingle with the now absent touch. He couldn’t understand if he was disgusted or if he wanted more of that. He couldn’t understand if he felt like it was right or wrong. He couldn’t understand why his chest would feel tight every time he thought of He Tian, but that tightness would simply leave when he saw him.

Mo Guan Shan was in turmoil.

On the other hand, He Tian was in heaven.

He was glad Mo Guan Shan wasn’t refusing his skinship. He was glad Mo Guan Shan wasn’t getting away from his hugs. He was glad Mo Guan Shan had actually given him space to hold his hand. He was glad Mo Guan Shan had accepted his invitation to watch a movie. He was glad he had a chance of finally making things right with Mo Guan Shan, starting with this pseudo-date.

The time passed painfully slow for both of them. For He Tian because he was too eager, because he was waiting for it to happen way too much. For Mo Guan Shan, because it was a slow burn, because he couldn’t understand why he had accepted it in the first place.

But in the end, the bell announcing the end of the school day finally rang and they were finally free. Mo Guan Shan was organizing his materials in his bag slowly, trying to postpone his certain demise as much as he could. Of course it didn’t take long for him to be interrupted by that same insistent hand on his nape, making its way upwards and caressing his hair with affection.

“You…” Mo Guan Shan started, not so sure in how to finish his sentence. Part of him wanted to slap He Tian’s hand away, part of him was enjoying the touch, just like the previous night.

“I?” He Tian asked, his hand now back to Mo Guan Shan’s nape and his thumb making circular movements.

“Nothing.” Mo Guan Shan shook his head, regretting having opened his mouth. “Let’s go?”

“I was just waiting on you.” For the first time since Mo Guan Shan had started being followed around by He Tian, he felt like He Tian was showing a genuine smile.

And Mo Guan Shan couldn’t help but feel his heart flutter with the possibility of him being the reason behind it.

When Mo Guan Shan finally finished organizing his stuff, they left the classroom and started walking side by side, He Tian still holding Mo Guan Shan by the nape. It was only when they reached the school gates that He Tian let go of him, stopping for a bit and looking upwards.

“He Tian?” Mo Guan Shan asked confused when he noticed He Tian wasn’t walking with him anymore.

“Where are we going?” He Tian asked, still looking at the sky.

“Weren’t we gonna watch a movie?”

“Yeah, but where?”

“I don’t know what you mean.” Mo Guan Shan sighed, getting closer to He Tian, so he didn’t need to shout in order to be heard.

“We could go to the cinema, or we could watch something at my place.” He Tian said. “You choose.”

Mo Guan Shan weighted the options. On one hand they could go to the cinema, a dark place full of strangers who He Tian probably didn’t give a single fuck about what they thought about him. On the other hand they could go to He Tian’s apartment, a place where there would be no witnesses.

“The cinema.” Mo Guan Shan said at last. “Long time since I’ve been there.”

“Great.” He Tian grinned and resumed walking, being followed closely by Mo Guan Shan when the latter noticed He Tian wouldn’t wait for him.

It took about fifteen minutes for them to get to the cinema, buy their tickets and popcorn and sit on their chairs. They both agreed on a generic superhero movie, and on sitting on chairs in the middle of the theater. He Tian did try convincing Mo Guan Shan into watching a horror movie, and later a romance one, but both were denied with fierce.

Both were too dangerous.

And Mo Guan Shan didn’t feel like taking risks.

Thirty minutes into the movie Mo Guan Shan started thinking about how that damn room was cold. The popcorn was long gone and he wasn’t moving his arm around to grab some, and the quietude made his body aware of the temperature. He couldn’t help but feel his limbs shiver with one or another wave of cold.

At some point Mo Guan Shan noticed that he was gripping the arm of the chair so hard in order not to tremble that his arm was starting to feel numb. That made him loose his grip and start opening and closing his fist, trying to make the blood flow properly again.

He Tian was just observing while Mo Guan Shan fought the cold and his sleeping arm, everything was just too cute in his eyes. After the fifth or sixth time Mo Guan Shan opened his hand, He Tian moved, and before Mo Guan Shan could close it again, he grabbed his hand, smiling triumphantly when he saw Mo Guan Shan jump in surprise.

“You are cold.” He Tian leaned and whispered on Mo Guan Shan’s ear. “You can pretend that never happen when he get out of here.”

It wasn’t like he could pretend that never happened.

It was the third time already.

And great, he was counting.

“I won’t.” He answered back, not really sure if He Tian had listened, however.

Shooing the annoying thoughts and actually trying to enjoy the movie, Mo Guan Shan finally looked up again, staring at the big screen and watching the movie. He got so into it that he did forget about He Tian holding his hand – or him holding it back. He also forgot about He Tian’s thumb caressing his hand on circular movements, or the fact that at some point, He Tian was leaning against his shoulder.

When the movie ended, neither of them talked about what happened there.

Even though He Tian wanted to hug and kiss Mo Guan Shan, he didn’t.

Even though Mo Guan Shan wanted to thank He Tian for the invitation, he didn’t.

Both boys only said their goodbyes and each one walked to their own homes, alone.

They also didn’t talk about what happened in the cinema through text, or the following morning. It was almost like that was just a figment of their imagination, and somehow that didn’t make Mo Guan Shan feel as near as good as he thought it would. At lunch break on Friday, Mo Guan Shan was fighting his need of asking He Tian why he wasn’t touching the subject. He was losing the fight.

“You don’t look so well today.” He Tian commented, sitting by his side in one of the steps near the basketball court.

Mo Guan Shan couldn’t control his tongue.

“Why are you pretending yesterday never happened?”

For a moment Mo Guan Shan forgot about the depth of his question and focused on how funny He Tian’s expression looked.

“I thought that was what you wanted.”

At least until He Tian brought him back to earth.

“It wasn’t.” He muttered, his head leaning on his crossed arms over his knees.

“Then what do you want, Little Mo?” He Tian asked, bringing back the pet name he didn’t use for a long time.

“I don’t know.” Mo Guan Shan answered, his breath heavy and his voice uncertain.

Soon, He Tian started patting his head, trying to sooth him with the delicate movements on his hair. It wasn’t working. Actually, it was only making Mo Guan Shan more and more flustered. It was only making Mo Guan Shan’s hands tingle and his heart flutter. It was only making Mo Guan Shan get more and more confused.

“Look at me.” Mo Guan Shan heard He Tian saying and raised his head, being surprised on how closer than he expected He Tian was. “I’ll give you some space, I’ll let you think.” His index finger traced Mo Guan Shan’s chin and jaw, just like Mo Guan Shan had done before. “But I also want you to meet me at the basketball court, at seven.” He finally let go of Mo Guan Shan and stood up. “I want an answer by then.”

And then he left.

Mo Guan Shan’s head was so confused he felt like fainting. He couldn’t understand what answer He Tian could possibly want, because his tone definitely showed Mo Guan Shan that it wasn’t only about what Mo Guan Shan wanted. There was so much more to that request than He Tian actually said that is scared Mo Guan Shan.

He did think. He thought hard, with every single neuron he could use, but everything he could think of was how he actually wanted He Tian to hold his hand more, to caress his hair, he wanted to tell He Tian how nice and warm it felt. But there was no way Mo Guan Shan could possibly confess those things.

When the school day was finally over, Mo Guan Shan hadn’t come to a definite answer yet, as he was still in doubt about what he was actually answering, and the anxiety was eating him from inside out.

As soon as the last bell rang, Mo Guan Shan just took a direct path to his house, without looking for He Tian or anybody else midway. All he wanted was a warm shower to see if he could finally settle his thoughts.

In the end it didn’t matter if he had taken a shower or not, as it didn’t help even a little to organize his oh so messy mind. And Mo Guan Shan knew it was already way past eight and that He Tian had called his cellphone at least a dozen times, but he just couldn’t. He had to go to sleep and forget that those past few days had ever happened.

Mo Guan Shan was so troubled with his problems that he only realized there was a real outside world when his mother knocked twice on his bedroom door and opened it.

“Guan Shan.” Her voice, as usual, was calm and soft. “There’s someone on the phone, they want to talk to you.”

“Who?” He asked immediately.

“Just answer the phone, son.” She answered, her eyes now showing that she was serious and really wanted him to answer the phone.

Defeated, Mo Guan Shan got out of his bed and walked to his home’s phone, picking it up and finally saying:

“Hello?”

“ _I thought we had a deal._ ” As he initially suspected, it was He Tian.

“I forgot.” He lied.

“ _Of course you did._ ” Mo Guan Shan heard He Tian chuckling, but not in amusement. “ _I’m still waiting for you._ ”

“How did you have my phone number?” He avoided He Tian once again, hearing a deep sigh in the other end of the line.

“ _You saw me talking to your class’ president, you know how I got it._ ” He Tian answered, his impatience clear in his voice.

“Why?”

“ _For emergencies, like this one._ ”

“He T–” But before Mo Guan Shan could continue, he was brutally interrupted.

“ _Stop running away, Mo Guan Shan_.”

He Tian’s serious tone showed Mo Guan Shan he wasn’t kidding. And in the end, Mo Guan Shan gave in once more.

“Okay.”

He went back to his room and grabbed the first shirt he saw and walked to the front door. Mo Guan Shan forgot completely about telling his mother he was going out, but the thrill behind everything was making his entire body numb.

When he got to the basketball court, He Tian was practicing three-pointers. He would throw the ball, sometimes missing, sometimes scoring, and after that he would run to the ball and get it again, repeating everything all over again.

“Hey.” Mo Guan Shan said, waking He Tian up from his daydream.

“Catch.” He Tian said as he threw the ball to Mo Guan Shan, who caught it easily. “Good catch.”

“Thanks.” Mo Guan Shan then started dribbling the ball, observing He Tian. In the beginning he thought He Tian wanted to talk, but his actions showed that actually he just wanted to have some fun.

As Mo Guan Shan started moving through the court, He Tian got closer, which made Mo Guan Shan increase his dribbling speed. The ball hit the ground soundly and soon their sneakers added more noise, as they started running and stopping suddenly.

He Tian smiled slyly while Mo Guan Shan tried to find a breach to throw the ball, but he knew it was hard going against He Tian, he had tried that before. At last all he could do was try to do an ankle breaker followed by a three-pointer.

He missed.

He Tian then grabbed the ball and started his attack, staring Mo Guan Shan deep in the eyes, trying to make him lose focus. It only worked when He Tian wetted his lips with the tip of his tongue. It was so obvious where Mo Guan Shan was looking that the only thing he needed to do was get closer to the basket and score a two-pointer.

They went on with their game, and when both were way too tired to keep playing, none of them really cared about who had won – He Tian had, they both just lied down on the grass beside the court and look up at the sky. The sky was dark and clear, and many stars shone, even in the middle of that polluted city.

“Did you think about it?” He Tian asked finally, after a long break, when they could only hear each other breathing.

“Think about what?” Mo Guan Shan pretended not to understand, pissing He Tian off.

“What do you want, Little Mo?” He Tian then repeated his words from earlier that day, wishing for Mo Guan Shan to be honest at least one time in his life.

“I want many things.” Mo Guan Shan chuckled, still high with adrenaline.

“Like what?”

Mo Guan Shan didn’t say anything, he just raised his arm and looked at the back of his hand, while his palm was facing the sky. Soon He Tian raised his own, repeating the same movement Mo Guan Shan had just done. And then, for the first time, it was Mo Guan Shan who held He Tian’s hand and intertwined their fingers in an extremely clumsy way.

“I don’t mind this.” He said. “It actually feels nice.”

That was about as much as he could say at that right moment, and He Tian knew it, so he didn’t press Mo Guan Shan any further. Instead, he got up and pulled Mo Guan Shan with him, and without saying a word he started walking, dragging Mo Guan Shan along as they were still holding hands.

It didn’t take long for them to be standing in front of Mo Guan Shan’s small apartment building. He Tian noticed that Mo Guan Shan was about to let go of his hand and go home, but before he could do it, He Tian pulled him once again, but now towards his chest.

Mo Guan Shan was caught by surprise and couldn’t do anything but put his free hand on He Tian’s chest and look at him, finally noticing how close they were. How close their mouths were.

He Tian didn’t do anything. It was a test. He just stayed there, two centimeters between his mouth and Mo Guan Shan’s, but he didn’t dare to close the gap. He wanted a green light, he wanted Mo Guan Shan to take the first step. So He Tian only looked deep inside Mo Guan Shan’s clouded and confused eyes, waiting for an answer.

Mo Guan Shan, on the other hand, thought he could have a heart attack at any moment. Half of him screamed in disgust, telling him to get away from He Tian at that right moment and never get near him again. The other half screamed in a new-found desire, telling Mo Guan Shan to just lean forward and drown himself on those devilish lips. His turmoil was so big that at some point, Mo Guan Shan felt dizzy.

He only woke up from the daze when he noticed He Tian’s mouth wasn’t near his own, but his cheek instead. And that was all that He Tian did, he gave a light, almost ticklish, peck on the right cheek, whispering on his ear afterwards:

“It’s late, your mom is probably worried.”

Mo Guan Shan would never admit, but he had harder problems than his mother’s worry to take care of.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, don't kill me!
> 
> It all has a meaning and you will understand.
> 
> Plus, next chapter there will be some PG-16 action~
> 
> Pops' out~


	4. Desire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mo Guan Shan dreams and He Tian daydreams.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM BACK, BITCHES!
> 
> I got carried away and this chapter is GIGANTIC!
> 
> You're welcome, I guess (?)
> 
> HAHAHAH
> 
> Anyway, have fun, I sure had a blast writing it~

Mo Guan Shan looked all around him, but he couldn’t recognize the place. Everything was too dark for him to know where he was, and the feeling of the unknown choked his breath and made him hyperventilate.

Soon, however, his fright was replaced by a familiar feeling, as he felt his hair being caressed.

At first it felt like home, calm and soothing, warming his cold body with the pleasant sensations.

As he got calmer, the world around him began to get brighter, the darkness now long gone and being replaced by the warm touch of sunlight.

The first thing he noticed was that he wasn’t in his house.

The second thing he noticed was that he was standing.

The third thing he noticed was that he was naked.

But Mo Guan Shan didn’t let it bother him, as he felt the soothing hands leave his hair and make their way down, massaging his nape, his neck-curve and his shoulders, the tension leaving Mo Guan Shan’s body like magic.

Those same hands traced his arms and palms, holding and squeezing his hands on an assuring gesture.

Mo Guan Shan felt safe.

And even when they got bolder, now travelling through his chest, Mo Guan Shan didn’t care. All those feelings were new and he wanted to enjoy every single one of them.

He wanted to enjoy the shy fingertips brushing over his nipples, making them tickle and harden. He wanted to enjoy the palms feeling his abs, circling his navel. He wanted to enjoy the short nails going down scratching his thighs lightly, giving him delightful goosebumps.

Slowly, Mo Guan Shan started to notice his growing member.

Those hands knew what they were doing, and they were so enticing and teasing that Mo Guan Shan’s reaction was nothing but natural.

As if reading his mind, both hands reached down. One of them circled the base of Mo Guan Shan’s penis, squeezing it just enough to make it pleasant. The other was busy going up and down his body, making the same patterns that were starting to leave Mo Guan Shan gasping for air and for more.

When the hand on his dick started the pumping movements, Mo Guan Shan could swear he was in heaven. He knew that jerking off felt nice, but he wasn’t aware how much nicer it is when someone else was doing it for him. And to add to the pooling sensation on his lower belly, the roaming hands got a companion, and soon his sensitive neck was being attacked by a voracious warm tongue.

All of those three sensations combined together were overwhelming and Mo Guan Shan was surely near his climax.

He could already feel his orgasm building up when he threw his head backwards, leaning it on broad shoulders. But it was only when Mo Guan Shan’s eyes met a pair of dark, cloudy grey ones that he woke up.

* * *

Mo Guan Shan woke up startled. His chest went up and down forcefully, breathing hard between pants. He sat on the bed for a moment, his head confused and his body flushed. His mind went everywhere and he couldn’t understand what had just happened, what had triggered such vivid dream.

“ _Shit._ ” He whispered to no one, his right hand drying his damp forehead and his left hand going down and confirming his deepest fear. “ _Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit._ ” He repeated.

It was unbelievable what was happening to his body, and all of it because of He Tian, that piece of dog shit he was and the things he had – not – done on the previous day.

Yes, it all started on the previous day.

Or was it five days before?

After a deep breath, Mo Guan Shan stood up and made his way to the bathroom as quietly as he could. He needed to think, but before thinking he had to take care of his lower half problem.

Mo Guan Shan had two options. He could take a normal warm shower and jerk off, getting rid of his boner in a pleasant way. Or he could take a cold shower – which would be a bold move in that especially chilly morning. It was, no kidding, one of the hardest decisions Mo Guan Shan had ever had to make.

On one side he just couldn’t let himself masturbate after **that** dream, it would be too much of psychological torture, but his boner wouldn’t calm down on its own under hot water, not with those scenes replaying endlessly inside his mind. On the other side, Mo Guan Shan knew he was too sensitive to the cold, and taking a cold shower would definitely be a physical torture.

Physical still felt better than psychological.

Turning the cold tap on, Mo Guan Shan closed his eyes and hissed with such cold water getting in contact with his burning hot skin. Soon, however, his shivering body started to feel numb and slowly he was getting used to the freezing temperature. He sighed and let the water cleanse his body while his mind wandered through his memories.

It had absolutely started when Mo Guan Shan committed the mistake of helping He Tian. Worse than helping itself, he had run in order to save the devil faster. After all the anger of being tricked, Mo Guan Shan couldn’t deny he was touched by He Tian’s honesty, all those words he had kept to himself, he decided to tell Mo Guan Shan, of all people. It was flattering, to say the least.

Then there was the following day. He Tian was even clingier than usual, but at some point Mo Guan Shan pushed him away and he stayed away. He Tian not only stayed away for a few minutes, but for the whole day, which made Mo Guan Shan’s heart ache and his mood worse than usual. In the end, He Tian was just being a dick that wanted to show how it hurt when Mo Guan Shan pushed him away.

It worked like a charm.

Then there was the guitar. For many it would be just an object, maybe even a way of keeping Mo Guan Shan tied to He Tian, and even Mo Guan Shan thought that initially. But then he noticed that there was much more depth to it. The fact that among so many options, He Tian knew the exact one he wanted. The fact that He Tian noticed he was left-handed. The fact that He Tian was grateful for Mo Guan Shan’s actions, but only knew how to show his gratitude with money.

After that they went to the cinema together. It really didn’t matter how much Mo Guan Shan denied, it was a date. And it was not only a date, but it was also a date Mo Guan Shan was glad he was invited to, as he actually had a good time. He didn’t care if he had felt cold at some point, he enjoyed both the movie and, although he would never say it out loud, He Tian’s company.

And on the following day, He Tian just pretended nothing happened. Mo Guan Shan couldn’t understand the reason, but he was overwhelmed by both anger and confusion. Anger because He Tian was ignoring what had happened. Confusion because Mo Guan Shan should be grateful about He Tian’s actions, not angry.

In the end, there was their basketball game. Innocent in the eyes of outsiders, but Mo Guan Shan saw what was really going on. Mo Guan Shan realized how He Tian, between dribbles, throws and ankle-breakers, was flirting with him. The unnecessary touching, the darting tongue, the teasing whenever Mo Guan Shan missed a two or three-pointer.

Not only He Tian was flirting with him, but Mo Guan Shan wasn’t feeling uncomfortable with it and stopping him. Mo Guan Shan was actually enjoying the situation, eager to see He Tian’s following move.

And then they talked. The question a confused Mo Guan Shan was avoiding like the plague was asked for the second time, and that time Mo Guan Shan couldn’t run away. So, in the middle of all his messy feelings, Mo Guan Shan ended up saying the only thing he was sure, which was also the initial reason behind his current boner problem.

Mo Guan Shan confessed he didn’t mind holding hands with He Tian, and more, that it actually felt nice. Of course, his heart was thumping like crazy, his voice was wavering and his hands sweating. Even though Mo Guan Shan had confessed that, it certainly hadn’t been easy.

Finally, to fuel the madness, there was the cherry on top.

The kiss.

The kiss that did not happen.

It was like, at that right moment, Mo Guan Shan’s brain had shut down and forgot everything, from Mo Guan Shan’s utter disgust of other people’s saliva, to Mo Guan Shan’s actual desire of kissing He Tian, of having those arms holding him and those lips over his.

However, Mo Guan Shan could also notice, even in the middle of his personal turmoil, that He Tian was giving him the choice of go forward or back off. In the end, Mo Guan Shan couldn’t make up his damn mind, so He Tian ended up being the one to step away.

He Tian still had some aces up his sleeves, though, and it was now as clear as that cold water running through Mo Guan Shan’s body. And it was probably that ace, that deep whisper right on his ear that actually didn’t mean anything more, that ignited this uncontrollable fire inside Mo Guan Shan, that made him hard on the spot and later on fueled his dreams.

Still, Mo Guan Shan couldn’t accept it.

He couldn’t accept the flutter, the butterflies or the heat pooling on his lower half. He couldn’t accept that he actually saw He Tian with those same lustful eyes. He couldn’t accept that He Tian had finally gotten under his skin and turned his whole world upside-down.

He couldn’t accept the desire.

* * *

Mo Guan Shan regretted the cold shower.

After finally calming down, which took a while, Mo Guan Shan left the shower and dried himself, but even after drying he was still cold. Even after putting on a long-sleeved shirt, a hoodie and the school’s jacket, he was still shivering. And even after drinking boiling hot tea and eaten warm fresh-cooked breakfast, his temperature just wouldn’t go up.

Not even walking all the way to school solved his problem.

“Damn, boss,” He heard buzzcut talking to him, and although his voice seemed far away, Mo Guan Shan could see he was close. “It seems like every day I see you, you look worse.”

“T-that’s a great th-thing to s-say.” Mo Guan Shan answered while his teeth chattered, irony all over his stuttered words.

“Well, you know what? Never mind.” Buzzcut shrugged. “Since we’ve been following a pattern and He Tian is coming this way, I’ll just leave.”

Mo Guan Shan didn’t even have a chance to call buzzcut and he was already gone. But soon he saw He Tian coming towards him. He thought about hiding or running away, even though he knew He Tian wasn’t aware of any of his physical problems. It was only when He Tian was way closer that Mo Guan Shan noticed how he was carrying a worried expression.

“What the hell happened with you?” He asked, grabbing both of Mo Guan Shan’s shoulders.

“N-nothing.” Mo Guan Shan answered, hoping that his quivering body didn’t give the truth away.

“You are shaking, Mo Guan Shan!” He Tian was clearly angry, but he didn’t raise his voice, he didn’t want to drag unwanted attention. “And your face is blue!”

“I-it’s noth-thing.” Mo Guan Shan tried brushing it off by slapping He Tian’s hands away. It actually only worsened his situation.

“Your hands are freezing.” He Tian said, his tone now frightened. “What happened to you?” He then touched Mo Guan Shan’s forehead and cheeks, checking his temperature. All Mo Guan Shan wanted was He Tian to stop touching him.

“I’m fi-fine.” He stuttered as his teeth kept chattering.

“I beg to differ.” He Tian rolled his eyes at Mo Guan Shan’s stubborn nature and grabbed his right hand. He then dragged Mo Guan Shan through the corridors, not really caring if people were staring.

“Where are you taking me?” Mo Guan Shan said each word slowly, making pauses between each one of them to prevent stutter. He also tried to ignore how He Tian’s hand seemed like burning against his freezing one.

“Nurse’s office.” He Tian scoffed, and that was Mo Guan Shan’s cue to shut up and just let himself be dragged, no matter how much he wanted to flee.

It didn’t take long for them to get to the nurse’s office. He Tian made him sit in one of the beds and then proceeded to talk to the old lady. Soon the woman got near Mo Guan Shan, examining him the best way she could with him clothed. She then told He Tian the obvious, that Mo Guan Shan was just cold, nothing really harmful to his health.

“So what do we do?” Mo Guan Shan heard He Tian asking.

“Just wrap the boy in a bunch of blankets and make him stay inside of them.” She replied. “Soon the heat will be unbearable and his temperature will go back to normal.”

“Isn’t there a faster option?” He Tian argued. “We have mock tests next week, he can’t just miss all of today’s morning classes.”

“Well…” She said in a hinting tone and Mo Guan Shan leaned forward to look at her. The nurse’s eyes glowed with mischief. “Everybody knows that bodies transfer heat faster.”

“Clearer.” He Tian practically demanded, and Mo Guan Shan had the guess that it was to make it clearer to him, and not He Tian.

“Skin on skin, boy.” She shrugged. “Hug him, shirtless, both of you.”

After the nurse said that, Mo Guan Shan’s already pale face became five times whiter. The last thing he needed was He Tian to lie down on a bed, hugging him, both of them with bare torsos. If Mo Guan Shan’s imagination had run wild thinking about only He Tian’s hands and tongue, it was terrifying what would happen if his whole upper body was added to the equation.

“You heard her.” He Tian said trying to contain his glee. “How do you prefer?” He asked as he discarded both his sweater and his shirt.

Mo Guan Shan just ignored his mouth watering with the sight.

“No way at all.” Mo Guan Shan deepened his scowl and hugged himself, his grumpy expression staring at He Tian’s beautiful lean body.

“If you don’t choose…” He Tian got nearer and his hands went for Mo Guan Shan’s shoulders, lowering his jacket on his arms. “I will.”

He Tian’s eyes shone with malice as he kept lowering Mo Guan Shan’s jacket. Mo Guan Shan, on the other hand, wondered why he wasn’t offering any resistance, but it was like his brain was reduced to a pile of mush while feeling He Tian’s fingers touch him so gently. He only regained his thinking ability when his torso was naked and he felt He Tian’s back press against his chest.

“Not like this!” Mo Guan Shan squeaked and pushed He Tian away, almost making him fall off the narrow bed. After the little scene, he turned around.

“Do you really wanna be the little spoon?” He Tian asked intrigued.

Mo Guan Shan didn’t reply.

No way in hell he would let He Tian feel that he was slowly getting excited. Dangerously excited.

In the end, He Tian only accepted that he wouldn’t get any answers and lied down beside Mo Guan Shan, hugging him from behind and pressing their bodies flushed against each other. He Tian emanated heat and his warmth was more than welcomed by Mo Guan Shan’s body.

* * *

When Mo Guan Shan opened his eyes, his body was back to his normal temperature, if not warmer. He felt the body behind him hold him tighter, making Mo Guan Shan feel the bold erection press between his butt cheeks.

However, instead of pushing it away, Mo Guan Shan got even closer, grinding his ass back on that erection and feeling it twitch with the friction. The hands that held him tight loosened and the left one started to feel his body up.

Once again Mo Guan Shan had to deal with fearless fingers that caressed his abs, navel, chest and nipples. The only difference was that the hand was more patient now, and instead of only brushing against Mo Guan Shan’s nipples, they pinched them lightly until they were perky. And then he teased them with his fingertips feathery touches.

Not long after Mo Guan Shan felt a warm breath blowing on his nape, and soft lips kissing his skin with such affection that Mo Guan Shan almost felt like melting. The ghostly kisses made their way from one shoulder to the other, and as the hand kept teasing his nipples, Mo Guan Shan was on the edge of begging.

But as his mouth was too busy gasping and moaning, Mo Guan Shan chose to grind his hips against that tempting erection.

Mo Guan Shan panted relieved when the hand stopped teasing his nipples and went south, breaking through the clothing barrier and grabbing his cock. The hand started jerking Mo Guan Shan off and the feeling was almost overwhelming when the light kisses on his nape were replaced by a wet and hot combination between licking and sucking.

His hips motion was involuntary as all he wanted was to come. But once again, when he finally looked to the owner of such pleasurable hands, now sure that it was indeed He Tian, Mo Guan Shan woke up.

* * *

He Tian didn’t know what to do.

Mo Guan Shan was clearly sleeping and probably dreaming, but that wasn’t an excuse for him to be grinding his hips backwards in such a lewd manner that He Tian believed his dick could explode at any moment, so excited he was, was it?

Although He Tian was sure he could come in his pants at any moment with Mo Guan Shan’s ass grinding against his dick so shamelessly, he also knew that it would be a total mess if Mo Guan Shan woke up and witnessed He Tian in that situation. All his work to get closer to Mo Guan Shan could surely be jeopardized and He Tian couldn’t risk losing what he fought so hard to have.

So He Tian did what common sense told him to, he took his arms away from Mo Guan Shan and stood up slowly, careful not to wake Mo Guan Shan up. After that he checked Mo Guan Shan’s temperature, glad that he wasn’t cold anymore, but rather feverish instead. But it was only when he let go of the worry about Mo Guan Shan’s health that he noticed what was really going on.

He Tian saw how flushed Mo Guan Shan’s skin was, how erect his nipples were and most importantly, how hard he was inside his pants. There was no way those loose track pants could hide that size of a bulge. It was tenting and tempting He Tian into touching it, but he wouldn’t do anything stupid and risk losing Mo Guan Shan once and for all.

After taking a deep and long breath, He Tian pulled the blankets all the way up to Mo Guan Shan’s neck, covering any signs that could give away his excitement. With only rosy cheeks and a sweaty forehead being shown, anyone would think he was just running a fever and nothing else.

When he was sure no one would suspect a thing, He Tian put his shirt and sweater back on and went to the nurse’s office door, thanking any existent divinities that the old lady wasn’t there. After being sure there was no one roaming through the halls, He Tian took a straight path to the nearest bathroom.

He still had a throbbing erection to take care of, after all.

* * *

For the second time that day, Mo Guan Shan woke up startled.

However, he wasn’t as near as confused as he was in the early morning. Somehow part of him was aware of what had triggered that sort of dream, and it was slightly better because it made a little bit more of sense. But that wasn’t enough to calm down his heartbeat rate or make him used to the sensation.

No, definitely not.

All Mo Guan Shan wanted that right moment was to throw himself over the school’s terrace. Maybe he would get into a coma and forget about everything, which would be delightful. Not. Unfortunately, the same part that was waiting for the dream to happen also screamed that running away wasn’t the answer. Not anymore.

Still, Mo Guan Shan wasn’t prepared to face his imminent problems, so it wasn’t like he would just accept it that easily. He couldn’t even think about the dreams without feeling shivers running down his spine and his entire body shaking with a feeling he was still unaware of what it really was.

With his mind still clouded with confusion, Mo Guan Shan sat on the bed, the blankets going down his torso and pooling on his lap. It was only then that he noticed he wasn’t wearing any shirts, and that he was feeling really cold.

Mo Guan Shan quickly got up and grabbed his clothes, putting them one by one, but stopping when he was about to put his school’s jacket. He surely wasn’t feeling that cold to wear that many warm clothes, and he had to somehow hide his on-going problem until it calmed down.

He sighed and held his jacket in front of his crotch, in a way it wouldn’t be obvious he was trying to hide something under it. Then Mo Guan Shan walked to the nurse’s office door, being surprised by the nurse as soon as he stepped on the corridor.

“There are still a few more minutes before the next bell.” She said. “You should rest a little bit more.”

“It’s ok.” He mumbled. “I should wash my face before the next class starts, it would be a mess if the teachers suspected I was sleeping.”

“That’s true.” She agreed, her soft eyes glowing with understanding. “Then go do your thing.” The nurse smiled. “Are you sure you are ok?”

“Yes.” He answered while nodding his head. “I’m not cold anymore.”

“Good.”

Mo Guan Shan didn’t say anything after the old lady passed by him. He only exhaled the breath he was holding and resumed walking, taking the path to the nearest bathroom. After the cold shower that morning only being more dangerous, Mo Guan Shan decided that he needed another solution to his problem, and he definitely was’t going to jerk off in his school’s bathroom.

Never.

While thinking about a way out, Mo Guan Shan opened the bathroom door and entered it, amazed with how silent that usually squeaky door was. Shrugging it off, Mo Guan Shan walked to the sink and put his jacket on its side, looking at his messy reflection on the mirror.

His face was once more tinted, pink blush creeping on his cheeks. The longer strands of his hair were glued to his forehead, which was damp with sweat. He balled his hands into fists in order to make them stop shaking, not sure about what he was going to do next.

All Mo Guan Shan wanted was for the scenes that haunted his dreams to stop being repeated over and over inside his mind. A dirty movie that was being nothing more than a nightmare to him.

But to Mo Guan Shan’s joy, his prayers were actually answered when he heard a deep and long sigh coming from one of the bathroom stalls – the only one closed, which was behind him. Soon, the noise of a toilet being flushed followed up, and then a lock being turned.

When the stall door opened, Mo Guan Shan saw through the mirror reflection who it was, being surprised with an image of an extremely disheveled – and hot, as his subconscious would scream – He Tian. He almost smiled when he saw He Tian’s eyes widen and his skin pale, but unfortunately he didn’t have time to make fun of He Tian, as this sight only made his dick remind him that he was still painfully hard.

“You’re aw-awake.” He Tian stated, his voice in an uncommon stutter.

“Yes.” Mo Guan Shan confirmed the obvious. “I guess you were right.” He tried joking, as the mood was suddenly heavy.

“Oh, yeah.” He Tian gave a half-assed laugh and walked to the sink beside Mo Guan Shan, washing his hands.

Mo Guan Shan didn’t answer. He didn’t know what to say in situations like that.

In the end He Tian only shook his head lightly and brushed his hair with his fingers, putting the stray strands back on place. He then walked to the door and opened it, but before he went through it and took his way to his classroom, he turned his head and looked to Mo Guan Shan.

“I wanted you to know that I care about you.” He smiled, and contrary to his laugh, it seemed genuine. “You got me dead worried.” His brows were furrowed and Mo Guan Shan knew he was being honest. “I’m glad you’re feeling better.”

Before the door closed behind He Tian, he heard Mo Guan Shan’s faint voice saying:

“Me too.”

He Tian just didn’t know to what Mo Guan Shan was referring to.

* * *

At lunch time they met again.

Mo Guan Shan was sitting on his usual spot by the steps near the basketball court, and He Tian had come by to make him company, or pester him, Mo Guan Shan didn’t really care. The only thing that he cared is that even after saying that he was ok with holding hands with He Tian, it was impossible to not be aware of his proximity after not only one, but two vivid and wet dreams.

He tried his best not to stiffen when He Tian’s hand sought for his, but his body betrayed him and he couldn’t move an inch as their fingers intertwined. At the same time he felt calm and safe, knowing that He Tian also didn’t mind holding his hands, but he also felt unknowing emotions bubbling inside, begging to come out in an eruption, begging Mo Guan Shan to jump on He Tian and mess him.

Just like He Tian had messed Mo Guan Shan in his dreams.

“You alright?” He Tian asked after seeing Mo Guan Shan shake his head harshly. It was clear he was holding a laugh.

“Not really.” Mo Guan Shan almost slapped himself when he noticed what he had said.

“What happened?”

Mo Guan Shan wanted to say: you. He settled with:

“I really don’t wanna talk about it.” And to make his point, he squeezed He Tian’s hand, trying to assure him it was nothing much.

He Tian noticed how concerned Mo Guan Shan looked with such deep scowl, and it made him let it go and not press Mo Guan Shan any further. He Tian also thought about pulling him closer, but he didn’t know if he could deal with Mo Guan Shan running away from him, so he just kept the same position.

* * *

That day, He Tian didn’t ask Mo Guan Shan to come home with him and cook.

* * *

When Mo Guan Shan opened his eyes, the first thing he saw was He Tian looking at him. He Tian’s hands were nested on his hips, holding him gently in place. Mo Guan Shan didn’t need to look down to know he was getting hard with He Tian’s proximity.

He Tian then smirked at him and Mo Guan Shan saw his eyes glint with what was probably mischief. Soon those same hands brought Mo Guan Shan closer, pressing their clothed bodies against each other.

Their faces were centimeters apart and this dreamy Mo Guan Shan was hoping for He Tian to just close the gap and kiss him, but He Tian didn’t. Instead, one of his hands sought for Mo Guan Shan’s and held it tight, at the same time his face lowered to Mo Guan Shan’s neck and started leaving soft kisses there.

The kisses kept on going for what seemed like an eternity, and Mo Guan Shan was on the verge of squirming and writhing, but somehow he couldn’t do anything. All he could do was feel the feathery touches going up and down his neck and shoulder, as one hand squeezed his hip and the other guided his own to He Tian’s chest.

As soon as Mo Guan Shan’s palm touched He Tian’s chest, he could feel the strong and fast heartbeat, feeling relieved once he knew he wasn’t the only one nervous with this situation. He Tian’s busy hand then brought Mo Guan Shan even closer. Mo Guan Shan couldn’t hold the gasp that left his mouth when his on-growing member touched He Tian’s already hard one, the new pressure more than welcome.

He Tian seemed to notice the effect that had on Mo Guan Shan and thrust his hips forwards, rutting against Mo Guan Shan’s crotch. That earned him a soft moan leaving Mo Guan Shan’s throat, and both of his hands to circle He Tian’s neck. He Tian kept the rocking of his hips going and he started to suck on Mo Guan Shan’s neck.

Mo Guan Shan cursed every time a new wave of pleasure hit him, not really caring if his voice was wavering because of his constant mewls. At some point he also realized that He Tian was no longer the one doing the grinding, but Mo Guan Shan himself. And again, he didn’t really care about it.

All Mo Guan Shan cared about was that devious hot tongue sucking and licking his neck, wishing for it to come ravish his mouth instead, that hard dick rutting against his own, pleasing him more than he would have guessed, and that hot welcome sensation that slowly was pooling on his lower belly, showing him how close he was to coming.

When Mo Guan Shan was a breath away from coming, He Tian’s mouth left his neck and came upwards. Their noses touched and their mouths were so close Mo Guan Shan could feel He Tian’s breath against his lips. But as soon as He Tian leaned in to capture Mo Guan Shan’s lips into his, Mo Guan Shan woke up.

* * *

“FUCK!” Not really aware of his surroundings, Mo Guan Shan shouted, frustration written all over his face.

“Mo Guan Shan, language!” He heard his mother saying from the kitchen, and slowly he became aware of where he was.

“Sorry, mom!” He answered. “I bumped my pinky toe.” He added just for good measure.

“That surely hurts.” She giggled. “Are you joining me to have breakfast?”

“Yeah, just give me a few minutes.”

Mo Guan Shan sat on his bed, crossing his legs and leaning his elbows on his knees. He massaged his forehead with his fingers, trying to calm down his fast heartbeat. Mo Guan Shan was reaching a moment he wasn’t sure if he was frustrated because he was having such dreams with He Tian, or if he was frustrated because he didn’t get to come in any of them and ended up waking up to a hard dick in his pants.

Reason told him it was for the best, as it would be easier to sneak into the bathroom with an erection than explain to his mother why his underwear was sticky with a suspicious white fluid. Yes, it was actually better to be left hanging in his dreams than to deal with the awkwardness of explaining to his mother what had happened.

Having to face a hard decision, no pun intended, Mo Guan Shan sighed. For two times he had calmed himself down by either a cold shower or thinking unpleasant thoughts, but he felt like it was doing nothing to help him, and instead such solutions were actually only adding to his pent up problem.

That made Mo Guan Shan’s left hand go down and palm his erection, sighing with the pleasurable contact. But his bliss didn’t last long, as his mother decided to knock on the door to tell Mo Guan Shan that his breakfast was getting cold and that he should join her soon. So after muttering a curse, Mo Guan Shan got up from his bed, glad that those loose sweatpants could actually hide his hard cock.

Soon he joined his mother at the small table they had on the kitchen, eating the delicious breakfast his mother had prepared to them. He felt himself calming down as he enjoyed the food, now too lost on the taste to care about what was happening to him just a few minutes before.

“You’re up early today.” She commented.

“Oh, yeah.” Mo Guan Shan shrugged. “Not sleepy.”

“That’s so unusual.” His mother giggled. “You always oversleep when you don’t have classes.” She seemed thoughtful for a second, and her expression changed from bright to worry. “Did something happen?”

The obvious answer was yes, but Mo Guan Shan couldn’t possibly deal with the wave of questions his confirmation would bring him.

“I just went to sleep early yesterday.” He said instead, choosing a safe yet truthful way out to his mother’s tricky question. “I was tired.”

“Well, that makes sense.” She shrugged, turning her attention back to the food.

The rest of the meal went by silent. Neither Mo Guan Shan nor his mother were talkative people, so it wasn’t like Mo Guan Shan wasn’t used to this kind of situation. Most of the meals they had together tended to be quiet and somewhat soothing, as both of them knew that neither liked talking that much.

After eating breakfast, Mo Guan Shan washed the dishes for his mother and went back to his room, grabbing his cellphone and checking if he had any unread messages. He had. One from buzzcut, one from – and that was weird – Jian Yi, and about ten from He Tian.

Mo Guan Shan opened buzzcut’s first, seeing that his friend just wanted to know if he was feeling better. He didn’t bother to answer. Jian Yi’s message was asking him if he wanted to meet them – probably the three of them – on Sunday, which was the current day. He also didn’t bother to answer. He Tian’s messages varied from questions asking if he had gotten home okay to wishes of good night or good morning.

He Tian’s last two messages, however, were different.

“ _Jian Yi told me you were ignoring him_.”

And.

“ _Are you going out with us today? I’m not really joining those two if you are not coming_.”

Mo Guan Shan seriously wanted a break from He Tian and all the emotions he brought with him, but his softer side couldn’t ignore the fact that He Tian needed constant attention to cure his loneliness.

“ _Good morning._ ” Mo Guan Shan sent.

“ _You’re up early._ ” He Tian’s response was almost immediate, and Mo Guan Shan couldn’t help the chuckle when he noticed He Tian said the same thing as his mom.

“ _So I’ve been told._ ”

“ _What happened?_ ”

“ _Not sleepy._ ” And right afterwards, he sent. “ _Where are you guys meeting?_ ”

“ _Oh, so you’re coming?_ ”

“ _You’d find a way to nag me anyway, lol._ ” Mo Guan Shan said, adding the ‘lol’ to show He Tian he was actually kidding.

“ _Of course._ ” He Tian answered and soon another message followed. “ _They haven’t decided what they wanna do, so we’re probably gonna meet at my house or Jian Yi’s to play video games._ ”

“ _Sounds better than spending the whole day doing nothing._ ”

“ _I don’t really care about what we’re gonna do_.” He Tian’s message made Mo Guan Shan raise a brow. “ _I just wanted to see you, anyway._ ” And his second message made a blush creep on Mo Guan Shan’s cheeks.

He didn’t know how to answer that.

“ _So answer Jian Yi, then he can finally make up his damn mind._ ” But luckily He Tian sent a third message.

“ _Ok._ ”

Mo Guan Shan then opened Jian Yi’s message and typed in “ _I’m going._ ”

It didn’t take even a whole minute for him to get a “ _Yay, we’re going to He Tian’s, meet us there in like, 30 minutes or so._ ” as a reply.

“ _Videogames?_ ” He asked.

“ _Of course!_ ”

Mo Guan Shan rolled his eyes, trying to understand how someone could be so lively so early in the morning. As a person who hated waking up early, all Mo Guan Shan wanted to do was go back to his bed and drift off to sleep. But knowing what was doomed to happen as soon as he dozed off, Mo Guan Shan decided that it was better to pretend to be a morning person, at least that day.

He changed, glad that the breakfast had been enough to calm his hormones down, and grabbed his cellphone and keys, telling his mother he would go out with some friends just before leaving the small apartment.

His house wasn’t far from He Tian’s, which meant he only took about twenty minutes to get there. After taking a last look at his cellphone’s clock and noticing he was little bit late, he decided to go up the elevator and knock on He Tian’s front door. Soon the door was opened by a smiling He Tian.

“You really came.”

“I don’t usually go back with my word.” Mo Guan Shan said, sounding ruder than he wanted to. “Can I come in?”

“Yeah, sure.” He Tian widened his smile and walked to the side, leaving a tight fit for Mo Guan Shan to go through.

Mo Guan Shan decided to not fight back this time and just do what He Tian obviously wanted him to, while ignoring the voices inside his head that were saying _You want to touch him too_. He went through the small gap, his body pressing against He Tian’s for a few short seconds.

“Redhead!” Jian Yi exclaimed excited when he saw Mo Guan Shan entering the living room.

Jian Yi didn’t even give Mo Guan Shan enough time to answer and his face was already turned back to the TV, his fingers going wild on the controller, pressing everything at once on false hopes of doing some fancy movement that would drop Zhan Zheng Xi’s HP considerably.

“They got here ten minutes ago.” He Tian said, and Mo Guan Shan suddenly realized how close he was. That made his entire body tense up and he hoped He Tian hadn’t noticed. “And they’ve also pretty much monopolized the controllers since then.”

“So I’m here to basically watch them play?” Mo Guan Shan asked, momentarily forgetting about their proximity and looking at He Tian.

“No, you are here to watch Zhan Zheng Xi kick Jian Yi’s ass and then mock him because of it.” He Tian corrected, adding an amused laugh afterwards.

“Seems like a plan.” Mo Guan Shan suppressed a chuckle, walking to He Tian’s huge couch and sitting on one of its ends, his back sprawled comfortably and his feet crossing lazily on the floor.

“How many times have you lost already, Jian Yi?” He Tian asked and Mo Guan Shan noticed that, with all the space he had on his couch, He Tian had chosen to sit right beside him.

“Fuck you, He Tian!” Jian Yi spat, showing He Tian the finger while he chose yet another character on that fighting game.

Only to lose once more.

At some point He Tian had sneaked his hand towards Mo Guan Shan, but instead of intertwining their fingers as he usually did, He Tian decided to play with Mo Guan Shan’s hand instead, massaging his fingers and fingertips, bringing a welcome ticklish sensation that almost made Mo Guan Shan laugh.

* * *

"Zhan Xixiiiiiii.” Jian Yi whined after losing for the umpteenth time. “Come on, let me wiiiiiiin.”

“No.” And as usual, Zhan Zheng Xi was completely indifferent.

“You are so mean.” Jian Yi kept crying, now placing the controller on the floor and getting up. “Would it hurt to let me win only once?”

“You’d nag me about it nonstop, it would be too bothersome.” Zhan Zheng Xi pointed it out, repeating Jian Yi’s previous actions. Only when Zhan Zheng Xi was standing beside his best friend that he noticed Jian Yi had become oddly quiet. “What’s wrong?”

Jian Yi didn’t say anything, he only pointed at He Tian and Mo Guan Shan, who were both leaning on each other and sleeping. But more precisely, he was pointing at their connected hands.

“What’s the matter?” Zhan Zheng Xi asked in a murmur, not really getting the point.

“Since when are those two _that_ close?”

Zhan Zheng Xi shrugged. He didn’t care.

“None of our business.” He stretched his limbs and added. “I’m hungry, though.”

“Well…” Jian Yi pouted and contemplated his actions, settling with a devious plan. He came near Mo Guan Shan and shook his shoulder lightly, whispering on his ear. “Hey, sleeping beauty, let your charming prince go and cook something for us, will ya?”

“Huh?” Mo Guan Shan asked confused, still unaware of his surroundings. “Jian Yi?”

“Yeah, we’re hungry.” Jian Yi said and waited for Mo Guan Shan’s eyes to focus on him so he could finish his sentence. “Could you please let go of He Tian and fix us lunch?”

Jian Yi had never seen someone’s face change from sleepy to utter horror so quickly as Mo Guan Shan’s did, and it was amusing as fuck. He laughed like mad as Mo Guan Shan pushed He Tian as fast as he could, which made He Tian wake up with his head hitting the cushions. Mo Guan Shan then stood up, face beet red and head fuming. Jian Yi was sure he was going to get punched, but Mo Guan Shan only turned away and made his way to the kitchen.

“What the fuck?” He Tian asked, massaging the side of his head that had hit the harder part of the couch.

“You two were looking super cute, but my hunger was bigger than your cuteness.” Jian Yi mocked.

“COME HELP ME, YOU PIECES OF SHIT!” Mo Guan Shan appeared on the living room holding an onion and definitely mad.

“Cute?” He Tian was still drowsy, which added to his confusion. “What are you talking about?”

“You two holding hands.” Jian Yi had to hold himself back not to say it too loud. “How did you even do it?”

“Shit, you saw that?”

“Well, it wasn’t like you two were hiding it or anything.” Jian Yi said matter-of-factly. “It was pretty damn obvious.”

“Damn it.” He Tian cussed. “Can you please not pester Mo Guan Shan about it?”

“But it’s so fun!”

“Yeah, but I don’t want you jeopardizing this.” He Tian cracked his shoulder and walked two steps, turning over and completing. “Unless you want me to jeopardize what you have with Zhan Zheng Xi as well.” And he threatened.

“As if it would be that easy.”

“Don’t underestimate me, Jian Yi.” He Tian’s voice was deeper and lower, which sent shivers down Jian Yi’s spine.

“Fine, jeez.”

After preparing and having lunch, the four boys actually agreed in doing a small competition using that same fighting game, so they could have some fun. He Tian also insisted in giving the winner a prize, so he prepared a small envelope with an unknown amount of what could only be money and put it on the counter, so after all the matches the winner could finally snatch it.

They spent about an hour playing the game, doing rounds and scoring points, and in the end Jian Yi lost by far, being followed by Zhan Zheng Xi. They were already aware of Mo Guan Shan’s competitive side, but they didn’t know it would go that far. They also didn’t know how good a person could be at a game, since Mo Guan Shan defeated Zhan Zheng Xi easily on their best of five matches.

The winner was going to be decided between He Tian and Mo Guan Shan, and for a moment Jian Yi thought He Tian would just let Mo Guan Shan win. Of course, Jian Yi couldn’t be more wrong. It was only when he saw the fire on He Tian’s eyes that he notice he was playing for real, and so was Mo Guan Shan.

Their matches were so close that in one of the games the winner was only set when the timer ran out, and the one with less HP lost. So then, after five long matches, Mo Guan Shan finally beat He Tian at something, winning their dumb little competition and proving to the other boys that he could be better than them at something.

“That was impressive.” He Tian said defeated, dropping the controller by his side and clapping his hands.

“How did you even do it?” Jian Yi asked amazed. “I was sure it was gonna be Zhan Xixi or He Tian winning.”

Mo Guan Shan stood up from his place on the floor and plopped his body on the couch, a proud smirk that combined with his usual scowl made him look like he was an evil mastermind.

“I own this game.” He confessed. “I’ve played against the AI so many times that I already know the hardest it can get.”

“I still gave you a hard time.” He Tian teased.

“It wouldn’t be fun if you hadn’t.” Mo Guan Shan said without thinking, but instead of regretting his words, he was glad he said them, as he received one of He Tian’s most beautiful smiles.

He Tian was happier than he could even imagine that day, and Mo Guan Shan saying he had fun while he was with him only made He Tian feel even happier, if that was humanly possible. He was so happy that he barely notice when Jian Yi and Zhan Zheng Xi said their goodbyes and left the apartment, leaving him and Mo Guan Shan alone.

He only woke up from his daze when he saw Mo Guan Shan’s hand waving in front of his eyes.

“You there?”

“Huh?” He jumped a little, his eyes focusing on Mo Guan Shan’s face. “Yes.”

“You were daydreaming.” Mo Guan Shan pointed.

“I’m just happy.”

“Why?” Mo Guan Shan asked, he couldn’t understand why such normal day was so special to He Tian all of a sudden.

“Did you have fun today?” Mo Guan Shan also couldn’t understand why He Tian was asking a question he already knew the answer for.

“A lot of fun.” Mo Guan Shan smiled at He Tian, showing him a softer expression for the first time.

“Shit.” He Tian mumbled and Mo Guan Shan looked even more confused. “I really wanna kiss you right now.”

It took about twenty seconds for He Tian to realize what he had just said and Mo Guan Shan to realize what he had just heard. Mo Guan Shan looked to the side while cleaning something that got caught up in his throat, a faint blush creeping on his cheeks. He Tian stood up and walked away, scratching his head and trying to think of what to say next.

“I’m sorry.” He settled. “I shouldn’t have said that.”

Yet again, Mo Guan Shan fought an inner battle. Half of him wanted to storm out of the room and leave He Tian talking to himself, but the other half wanted to tell He Tian to not only stay at want, but actually take actions and do it. That half wanted to be kissed by He Tian so bad that he didn’t even care about his saliva problem or anything else.

“Don’t apologize.” Mo Guan Shan mumbled, his heart finally deciding for a place in the middle.

“But-” He Tian tried arguing, but Mo Guan Shan shut him by pressing one finger on his lips.

“It’s ok.” He reassured, not really sure why he was doing it.

“You mean it?” He Tian asked after taking Mo Guan Shan’s hand away from his mouth. He didn’t trust himself with those fingers so close to his tongue. He ended holding Mo Guan Shan’s hand between both of his while Mo Guan Shan nodded his head.

He Tian was so relieved he wasn’t pushed away like when he actually kissed Mo Guan Shan, and so relieved that Mo Guan Shan didn’t have that disgusted look on his face that all he wanted to do was hug Mo Guan Shan. And before even thinking twice, that was what He Tian did. Both of his arms circled Mo Guan Shan’s waist and he brought him closer, hiding his face on the crook of his neck.

Mo Guan Shan didn’t have enough time to react before he saw himself locked into a bear hug. He Tian held him tight as if Mo Guan Shan would run away as soon as he let go, and Mo Guan Shan thought that maybe he indeed would. After finally understanding and accepting the situation, Mo Guan Shan hugged He Tian’s neck gingerly, feeling He Tian’s warm and calm breath tickling his neck.

After a few minutes on that position, Mo Guan Shan felt something poking him, followed by He Tian murmuring on his ear, his voice dangerously deep.

“You should go.”

He didn’t even need to say it twice for Mo Guan Shan to comply. He freed himself from the hug and took a few steps back, looking at He Tian and noticing that what was poking him was indeed what he thought it was, He Tian’s dick. Mo Guan Shan swallowed the lump that formed on his throat and turned around, leaving the apartment without even saying goodbye.

Mo Guan Shan only breathed again when he was inside the elevator. His heart was thumping so hard inside his chest he could hear the heartbeat and feel it against his ribcage. He cursed at himself, half for being a coward and half for staying in that hug for so long. Mo Guan Shan was so mad that he barely notice that he was also half hard inside his pants.

* * *

When Mo Guan Shan opened his eyes, he saw He Tian walking towards him. He thought about running away, but deep down he knew he didn’t really want to.

Soon He Tian was close enough, and before Mo Guan Shan could say a word or even move, He Tian had already grabbed both of his wrists and tackled him to a bed Mo Guan Shan noticed that was behind him.

With both of his hands trapped under He Tian’s strong hold, Mo Guan Shan was completely at He Tian’s mercy, and that thought only made his dick start getting hard. Before he could ask He Tian what he was doing, his mouth was ravished by He Tian’s lips, the warm tongue that had made Mo Guan Shan crazy by licking his neck was now invading his mouth, intertwining with his and making him want more.

Mo Guan Shan didn’t even know he knew how to kiss, but even so he saw himself corresponding the kiss as if it was the last thing he would do while living. He panted against He Tian’s cheek, his tongue rolling against He Tian’s with the same intensity, making his moans get trapped in his throat and his eyes roll to the back of his skull.

He Tian seemed to know what his kiss was doing to Mo Guan Shan, as his hand flew downwards and palmed Mo Guan Shan through the fabric of his sweatpants. Mo Guan Shan couldn’t hold his hips in place and soon he saw himself buck them upwards, meeting both He Tian’s fingers and crotch.

It seemed to do the trick and He Tian took his hand away, grinding his own clothed cock against Mo Guan Shan’s, savoring his tongue and whines and he picked up the pace. Mo Guan Shan was light-headed, not enough oxygen in his brain, but that only added more fuel to his fire, and it seemed that as choked as he felt, more intensely he kissed He Tian and harder he grinded his dick against He Tian’s.

He could already feel his orgasm building up, especially after He Tian’s free hand broke through his shirt and pinched a nipple, overwhelming Mo Guan Shan with pleasure. He was so damn close he could taste his climax, but deep down he knew exactly what was going to happen, so he wasn’t surprised when he woke up.

* * *

The first thing Mo Guan Shan did when he opened his eyes was grab his cellphone and look at the time. It was still late at night, three in the morning to be more precise. He was hard and his body was sweating, and he had finally decided that he couldn’t ignore the fact that he was physically attracted to He Tian, not anymore.

He took a deep breath and unlocked his cellphone, still not believing that he was really going to do what he was going to do. He also raised his torso, sitting on the bed, and reached for the jacket that was sitting on his chair backrest for over a week now.

Mo Guan Shan needed to take a deep breath before he had the courage to press the ‘Gallery’ button on his cellphone, his finger hovering over the ‘Received’ folder. He took a second deep breath and pressed it, scrolling down until he found what he was looking for. The image he had sworn he would delete but never had the guts to look at it again.

He Tian’s dick picture.

After a third deep breath Mo Guan Shan opened the photo full screen, feeling his heartbeat increase and his erection twitch inside his pants. He then took a fourth deep breath and discarded his sweatpants and underwear, throwing them somewhere on the floor. As he usually slept without wearing any shirts, Mo Guan Shan was completely naked, but not for long, since he quickly dressed He Tian’s jacket.

Ah, Mo Guan Shan was deep in shit and he knew it.

But it was way too late to back off.

Giving the picture one last look and fueling his already vivid imagination, Mo Guan Shan brought his left hand to his dick and his right hand to his nose, breathing in on a fifth deep breath He Tian’s scent. Mostly tobacco, but still enough to send goosebumps all over Mo Guan Shan’s body, as it felt like He Tian was really there.

His hand then started pumping his already swollen dick, trying to give it the break he needed, after so many days getting hard and not getting any release. Mo Guan Shan was so pent up from He Tian teasing and dirty dreams that he didn’t even last longer than three minutes jerking himself off. He gasped for air while trying to restrain his voice, his palm covering his dick and trying to catch his cum, as he didn’t want to dirty his bed.

He indeed felt relieved, but it wasn’t as near as enough. Even after coming hard, Mo Guan Shan’s dick was still standing proud, no signs of calming down anytime soon. So after cleaning his hand on a dirty towel, Mo Guan Shan brought his hand once more to his dick and started pumping it again.

However, instead of breathing in He Tian’s scent, Mo Guan Shan decided to try what He Tian had done to him in his dreams and he was still unsure if it was true or not. His right hand reached for his right nipple, which was already erect, and hovered over it so lightly he wouldn’t even have noticed. But he was so oversensitive after his first orgasm that Mo Guan Shan had to swallow his own moan.

He couldn’t decide if it was a good or a bad thing having sensitive nipples, but at that right moment he felt like it was good, since it was making his second orgasm close so much faster than it would usually be. After teasing his nipples, eventually pinching them and pumping his cock so fast he felt his hand would fall off, Mo Guan Shan came for the second time, now forgetting about covering his dick and spilling cum all over his sheets.

“Fuck.” He murmured, burying his head on his arms and inhaling He Tian’s scent once more. He had to hold all his rage in when he noticed his dick growing hard for the third time.

And when Mo Guan Shan came for the third time, he moaned He Tian’s name, finally realizing how fucked he really was.

There was no denying anymore.

* * *

Mo Guan Shan avoided He Tian at all costs that Monday morning. Mo Guan Shan avoided anyone that knew him or He Tian or both of them. Mo Guan Shan avoided everybody like they were the plague.

He did that for the whole morning, lunchtime and afternoon, and it was only when the bell announced the end of classes that he finally accepted he was going to eat himself from inside out if he didn’t talk to anyone. And luckily he knew the exact person who would listen to him, the same person who always listened to him when he needed.

“I need to talk to you.” Mo Guan Shan said in a low, suspicious tone. His head turned from one side to the other, looking around. “But not here, come with me.”

“Is everything alright?” Buzzcut asked worried as Mo Guan Shan’s unusual actions frightened him, but he still followed.

“Shhhhhh.” Mo Guan Shan shushed him, his scowl deep and with a hint of fear.

As they walked, buzzcut could notice some quirks on Mo Guan Shan’s new behavior. The way he looked left and right, front and back and even up and down. He clearly wanted to be aware of every little person observing them, almost like they were committing a crime and Mo Guan Shan was paranoid of getting caught in the act.

“What’s the deal?” Buzzcut asked again, as soon as Mo Guan Shan stopped walking. They were at the back of the school.

“There’s something going on and I have to tell someone.”

“And you picked me of all people?” Buzzcut chuckled, his eyes rolling in disbelief. “I thought you’d rely on He Tian in moments like this.”

“NO!” Mo Guan Shan said hasty, his voice louder than he wanted. “I…” He hesitated, lowering his tone again. “He Tian can’t possibly know any of this.”

“Why not?” Confusion was written all over buzzcut’s face. “You two became really close lately.”

“No, no, no, no, no.” Mo Guan Shan denied, his no’s being repeated so fast he ran out of breath. “We’re not close.” He stated, starting to look around again. “And if he finds out about this…” Mo Guan Shan hesitated once more, cleaning his sweaty hands on his pants. “He’s gonna turn my life into hell.”

“That bad?” Mo Guan Shan’s last statement spiked buzzcut’s curiosity, and now he had his brow raised in interest.

“Yes.” Mo Guan Shan said. “I had a dream.” He whispered, getting close to buzzcut so he was sure he was heard.

“All this fuzz over a dream?” Buzzcut rolled his eyes, interest lost.

“A wet dream.”

“Congratulations, boss!” Buzzcut said in a mocking tone. “You are a healthy teenager going through puberty.”

“You don’t get it.” Mo Guan Shan spat angry, the words said between his teeth and in a low and menacing tone.

“Then be clearer, fucks sake.”

“It was with someone _we_ know.” He muttered, emphasizing the ‘we’.

“We know?” Buzzcut’s curiosity suddenly spiked once more. “So it’s someone from school?”

“Yes.” Mo Guan Shan confessed. For a moment his head was hung low and he seemed thoughtful, but soon he was back to his paranoid self again. “Promise you won’t laugh.”

“Why would I laugh?” Buzzcut shrugged. “Is she ugly?”

“It’s not a she.”

For a moment, buzzcut could swear he was hearing the gears turning inside his head. Slowly, he was putting all the puzzle pieces together, one by one. First it was their ‘type’ talk, when Mo Guan Shan couldn’t say what kind of girl he liked. Then there was his overreaction when he was asked if he was in love. Then the weird conversations he was having with a determined male schoolmate. Then the unusual nature of his relationship with said schoolmate.

Everything made sense.

“Is it He-” But before buzzcut could finish, he was interrupted.

“Don’t say his name.” Mo Guan Shan muttered, again looking all around him. “You’ll summon him, he’s the devil.”

“Ok, ok.” Buzzcut raised his hands, defeated. “Why are you telling me all of this, anyway?”

“Because I don’t know what to do.” Mo Guan Shan squatted on the floor, his arms hugging his legs and his chin leaned on his knees. Great, he was sulking.

“What do you mean?”

“I’m pretty sure he likes me.” Mo Guan Shan raised his head, looking at buzzcut.

“Isn’t it a good thing?”

“Do _I_ like him, though?” Mo Guan Shan sighed, his brows furrowed deeply. “All I have given him were red flags. I pushed him away. I told him he disgusted me.”

“Why?”

“Because that fucking pile of dog shit kissed me.” After that buzzcut couldn’t hold his laugh. Mo Guan Shan was being so damn contradictory it was funny.

“Ain’t that what you secretly want, dude?”

“It wasn’t when he did it.” Mo Guan Shan sighed again, his fingers pulling the longer strands of his short hair. “It was before all the stuff that happened with She Li.”

“You do want him to do that now, though.”

“I don’t know!” Mo Guan Shan snapped, getting up once more. Deep inside he knew he wanted He Tian to kiss him, but he wasn’t ready to say that out loud. “I do have those dreams, but when I wake up I feel so dirty, so guilty.”

“Dreams? Plural?”

“Of everything I fucking said, _that_ was what caught your attention?”

“Sorry, but when you mentioned it before, I thought it was a onetime deal.”

“I had three or four already. Almost the same thing, but it changes some stuff.”

“And you feel dirty and guilty.” Buzzcut confirmed.

“Yeah.” Mo Guan Shan groaned, his despair clear. “I don’t know why, though.”

“Maybe because you’re both men?” Buzzcut guessed would was the most probable reason.

“I don’t know…” And to buzzcut’s surprise, Mo Guan Shan didn’t really seem bothered about it. “I guess it’s more like I’m using him unconsciously?”

“But haven’t you just called him the devil?” Buzzcut chuckled. “Maybe he deserves to be used.”

“I’d agree to that a few weeks ago.” Mo Guan Shan’s scowl seemed worried, thoughtful again. “He’s more than the flashy popular guy he shows people.”

“Boss…” Buzzcut hesitated, choosing his words wisely so he wouldn’t get Mo Guan Shan mad. “Don’t you think that maybe, just maybe, you might like him?”

He didn’t choose his words wisely enough and Mo Guan Shan did overreact.

“Are you out of your damn fucking mind?” Mo Guan Shan snarled while grabbing buzzcut’s shirt. “Who do you think I am?” He shook buzzcut. “Some cute schoolgirl?”

Mo Guan Shan knew the truth, though.

But he was so mad at buzzcut that he didn’t notice buzzcut’s face growing pale and his expression was showing imminent danger.

“You do look cute, though.” Mo Guan Shan felt a cold shiver run down his spine when he heard that snarky tone. “And I’d pay to see you dressed as a schoolgirl.”

As fast as Mo Guan Shan had grabbed buzzcut, he let go and turned around. His face was beet red and his hand shook in both rage and embarrassment, but that didn’t stop him to grab He Tian by the collar.

“He Tian.” He hissed, bringing He Tian closer and threatening him with a piercing gaze.

Damn, he really wanted to kiss He Tian.

“Yes?” He Tian’s voice was deeper, but not menacing, no. It was the exact tone he needed to use to send a jolt directly to Mo Guan Shan’s crotch, making him let go of He Tian’s collar and walk at least ten steps backwards. “Cat got your tongue?”

“What are you doing here?” Mo Guan Shan asked with his usual rude tone, looking at buzzcut in a mute plead for him to stay.

“Someone avoided me the whole day.” He Tian clicked his tongue, not amused. “I was looking for you.” He tried getting a few steps closer, which he luckily could do without Mo Guan Shan retreating. “I missed you.”

“You want me to cook for you, don’t you?” Mo Guan Shan spat instead, ignoring He Tian’s last sentence.

“That would be great!” He Tian’s expression lightened and he took the opportunity to get even closer. “Let’s go?”

Mo Guan Shan looked at buzzcut one last time, knowing for sure his friend couldn’t help him and that he was alone on that one. He wanted to cuss and punch buzzcut, but all he ended up doing was what he had learned to do like a pro: follow He Tian.

However, when they were near the school gates, Mo Guan Shan stopped and waited for He Tian to notice he was not trailing behind. Soon He Tian stopped and turned around, going back the steps Mo Guan Shan hadn’t taken.

“What’s wrong?”

“He Tian.” Mo Guan Shan said low, his expression pained. “I need some space.”

At that moment, He Tian looked like he was hit by a gun.

“Don’t get me wrong.” Mo Guan Shan tried explaining. “After the last week my mind is all over the place.”

Slowly, He Tian’s expression started coming back to normal.

“I don’t hate you, I swear.” He inhaled deeply, choosing his words. “I just need to organize my thoughts.”

He Tian’s eyes then became soft and he stepped forward, now one arm’s distance.

“Please.” At last Mo Guan Shan pleaded.

He Tian’s answer to his plead was the same as the previous day. He pulled Mo Guan Shan into a tight embrace, inhaling his scent and feeling Mo Guan Shan’s body against his. Not long after he let go of Mo Guan Shan.

“Text me.” He said right before turning around and taking his route home, leaving Mo Guan Shan alone.

Mo Guan Shan was caught observing He Tian’s back move farther and farther away when he woke up from his daydreaming and started walking home. It didn’t take long for him to get home, greeting his mother as soon as he opened the front door. He went directly to his room and grabbed a pair of clean boxers and sweatpants, dropping his bag by the door.

He then went to the bathroom and stripped, turning on the warm tap and getting under the water. He washed his whole body, not really feeling clean after finishing his shower. After that Mo Guan Shan left the bathroom, dumping his dirty clothes on the laundry basket, soon being called by his mother to join her for dinner.

“How was school today?” Mo Guan Shan’s mother asked. She usually wasn’t fond of small talk, but it seemed like she noticed something different on her son.

“It was…” Mo Guan Shan hesitated for a second, finding himself tired of hiding. “A disaster.”

“Oh?” She seemed surprised, but she kept eating anyway. “How so?”

“Mom, I…” He played with his chopsticks, not really sure on what he wanted to say. “I need to ask you something.”

“Go ahead.” Mo Guan Shan’s mother said on a reassuring tone, aware that her son was extremely trouble by whatever situation he was going through.

“Would you be too disappointed if I told you that I…” His throat tied to a knot and he had to use all of his willpower to finish his sentence, especially after noticing his mother’s expression was terrified. “That I might be into another guy?”

“Oh thank God.” She sighed relieved, her left hand over her chest and her expression once again carefree. “For a second I thought you were gonna tell me you had committed a crime.”

Mo Guan Shan couldn’t understand his mother’s reaction.

“Did you listen to any of the words I’ve just said?” He asked.

“Of course I did, Guan Shan.” She smiled softly. “Why would I be disappointed?”

Mo Guan Shan blinked once, and then twice, he wasn’t so sure himself.

“Because it is… Wrong?”

“There’s nothing wrong with it, son.” She once again reassured. “Is it He Tian?”

Her question made Mo Guan Shan choke on his food, coughing up the rice he was trying to swallow. She only looked at him and let an amused laugh, clearly enjoying her son’s surprise.

“Is that obvious?” He asked at last.

“Lucky guess.” She shrugged. “Are you gonna tell him, though?”

For a second, Mo Guan Shan put his chopsticks back on the table and thought about it. He did felt an urge to run to He Tian’s apartment and tell him that he liked him and that he actually wanted to kiss him and maybe do some other stuff. But he also felt the urge to go back inside his shell and never come out of it, hiding his true feelings so deep he would eventually forget about them.

“I think you should.” Mo Guan Shan’s mother advised, even though he hadn’t asked her.

“Really?” His unsure tone showed her how afraid he was.

“Of course.” She smiled.

“I should, right?” He said and his mother nodded her head. Suddenly, he got up from the chair. “And I should do it right now.”

Mo Guan Shan didn’t even listen to his mother, he just went to his room and grabbed his hoodie and cellphone, walking out of the house. The last thing he heard before he hit the streets was his mother shouting for him that it was too late and the streets were dangerous, but the adrenaline was already flowing through Mo Guan Shan’s body and he couldn’t care less.

Once he was at He Tian’s building, Mo Guan Shan entered it and went straight for the elevator, pressing the button for the highest floor. It was only when Mo Guan Shan’s balled fist was one centimeter away from knocking on the door that Mo Guan Shan realized what he was doing, out of sheer impulse. He suddenly felt his hands shake and his legs feel like goo, unable to stand still.

He was an idiot. No way in hell he could just barge in He Tian’s apartment and tell him he liked him, he didn’t have the guts to be so straightforward. So in the end Mo Guan Shan sat there, beside the door, trying to calm his heart down and decide if he was going to enter He Tian’s apartment or flee back to his house.

Mo Guan Shan knew he couldn’t make that decision by himself, so he took his cellphone out of his pocket and opened the messages app, going directly to buzzcut’s conversation. He told buzzcut everything, from his talk to his mother to his impulse of running all the way to He Tian’s. He told buzzcut he was still there, sitting by the door without knowing what to do.

Buzzcut didn’t reply to any of his texts.

He didn’t need to.

Three minutes later, when Mo Guan Shan was about to stand up and go back home, He Tian’s apartment door opened, revealing a breathtakingly disheveled He Tian. Mo Guan Shan stood up lightning fast, prepared to flee when he felt a strong hand hold his wrist. It wasn’t enough to keep Mo Guan Shan in place, he could go away if he wanted to, but he didn’t.

 “Are you coming in?” He Tian asked, letting go of Mo Guan Shan’s wrist and giving him space to get in the apartment.

Mo Guan Shan nodded and walked inside, his head hanging low and his cheeks burning hot. He was feeling happy and embarrassed at the same time, and he couldn’t control any of his emotions. But still, he didn’t know if he would be able to say something to He Tian.

“I gave you the space you asked for.” He Tian said right after closing the door behind him. “And then I receive a text message of who knows telling me you were at my door.” He Tian chuckled. “I thought it was a prank, but I had to check it out anyway.”

“Fucking Cuntou gave me away.” Mo Guan Shan spat, now nervousness being added to his on-growing list of emotions.

“So, what brought you here?”

Mo Guan Shan looked at He Tian and took a deep breath, noticing he was taking a lot of deep breaths lately. His left hand flew up to the back of his head, scratching it while he chose his words. His right foot tapped the floor nonstop and He Tian could notice how Mo Guan Shan was on the verge of losing it.

“ _What do you exactly feel for me?_ ” Mo Guan Shan mumbled so lowly He Tian wasn’t able to hear him.

“What?”

“He Tian…” Mo Guan Shan looked at him and got two steps nearer. “I’m a coward.” His chuckle was sad and he felt disappointed with himself.

“Why would you say that?” He Tian asked trying to make his voice as soft as possible, Mo Guan Shan was acting just like a scared cat and anything could make him run away.

“I thought a lot.” His pained expression hurt on He Tian, but he let Mo Guan Shan continue. “I accepted.” He Tian could see Mo Guan Shan’s hands shaking and he wanted to hold them, but he had been asked for space he would give it. “And I wanted to tell you everything, that’s why I came.”

“What is everything?” He Tian couldn’t help but to feel confused with Mo Guan Shan’s words. “I’m not following.”

“But I’m a damn coward.” Mo Guan Shan ignored He Tian’s question and kept his monologue. “A damn coward that can’t even do the one thing he’s supposed to.”

“What is it?” He Tian then raised his voice a little, making Mo Guan Shan flinch.

“I asked what you exactly feel for me.” Mo Guan Shan said in a low sigh. “I needed to know what someone like you would feel for someone like me.”

He Tian then decided to stop playing safe and walked the remaining steps between them, he grabbed Mo Guan Shan’s hands between his and held them tight, squeezing them lovingly. After that he brought Mo Guan Shan’s hands close to his face, kissing his knuckles lightly.

“ _I like you._ ” He whispered, his eyes glued to Mo Guan Shan’s. “ _I like you so much._ ” He repeated.

Mo Guan Shan felt like his heart skipped a beat when He Tian confessed what he felt. He wasn’t sure if He Tian was just playing with his naiveté or if he was serious about Mo Guan Shan and he needed to be sure. He was so relieved that he wasn’t just a toy that he couldn’t even control when tears started falling.

“Why are you crying?” He Tian’s tone overflowed with worry, but slowly he began realizing that behind the tears, Mo Guan Shan was smiling.

“Thank you.” He said, adding a few seconds later. “I’m so pathetic.” Before He Tian could ask the reason, Mo Guan Shan freed his hands and wiped the tears, laughing happily. “Crying when someone confesses to me, such a loser.”

“You’re none of that.”

“Yeah, sure.” Mo Guan Shan answered ironic. “Can I ask you another thing?”

“Mhm.” He Tian nodded, giving up on disagreeing with Mo Guan Shan.

“Hold me.”

After Mo Guan Shan said those words, He Tian froze on the spot. He wasn’t sure what Mo Guan Shan exactly meant with it and he didn’t want to do anything that could possibly send him running away. Still, he also couldn’t just ask, as Mo Guan Shan would probably try punching him and call him a pervert.

He Tian didn’t need to do anything, because eventually realization hit Mo Guan Shan and he noticed the double meaning behind his own words. With his face flaming in shame, Mo Guan Shan punched He Tian’s chest lightly.

“I meant hug me, you pervert!” He Tian chuckled at Mo Guan Shan’s shy self, that couldn’t even bring himself to hug He Tian.

He didn’t mention any of his thoughts, though, He Tian only got even nearer Mo Guan Shan and circled his arms around Mo Guan Shan’s waist, bringing him close. That time Mo Guan Shan didn’t hug him by the neck, but gripped at his shirt instead, his hands holding the fabric strongly, maybe afraid of He Tian going away.

At some point Mo Guan Shan even leaned his forehead on the crook of He Tian’s neck, breathing that familiar scent that had driven him crazy the previous night. Trying to shoo away those dirty thoughts, Mo Guan Shan focused on feeling He Tian’s quickened heartbeat against his own, happy he wasn’t the only one nervous.

“Remember what you said yesterday?” Mo Guan Shan muttered after a while.

“I said many things yesterday.” He Tian couldn’t help but to give one of his snarky comments. “You gotta be more specific.”

“When you asked me if I had had fun.” Close like they were, Mo Guan Shan felt exactly the moment when He Tian held his breath.

“Are you talking about what I think you are?” He Tian asked after a long pause.

“I want you to do it.” Mo Guan Shan said, surprised with his own sudden boldness. “I’m not running away anymore.”

“Wait a minute.” He Tian inhaled sharply and broke their hug. “You haven’t said anything, but by any chance, do you like me back?”

“Oh, I haven’t?” Mo Guan Shan shrugged and looked at He Tian, that same soft expression he had shown the previous day sitting on his face. “I do.”

That was probably as much as He Tian would have Mo Guan Shan saying, but combined with that warm smile and the fact that Mo Guan Shan, for once in his life, didn’t carry a scowl, it was more than enough. And yet again, He Tian felt the urge to kiss Mo Guan Shan.

That time, however, nothing stopped him.

Both of He Tian’s hands held Mo Guan Shan’s face, his touch light and warm. As soon as he saw Mo Guan Shan closing his eyes, which was the most obvious green light he could ask for, He Tian leaned in, almost unable to believe when his lips touched Mo Guan Shan’s so softly it was almost like it wasn’t there.

It was Mo Guan Shan who got closer, pressing their lips further against each other and feeling He Tian’s mouth fit perfectly against his. He Tian then just kept nibbling at Mo Guan Shan’s mouth softly, feeling it move and match its movements with his. He Tian didn’t want to deepen the kiss, in fear of Mo Guan Shan getting scared and fleeing for what would be the umpteenth time.

Luckily, Mo Guan Shan was thinking the opposite, as the images from his dreams came back to replay on his mind as vivid as ever. All he wanted was to forget about disgust or anything else and feel He Tian’s tongue against his, invading and tasting his mouth, ravishing him with uncontrollable hunger.

And that was what made Mo Guan Shan be the brave one and press his own tongue against He Tian’s lips. He wanted to chuckle when He Tian gasped surprised, but he controlled himself and focused on what was happening at that right moment. It didn’t take long for He Tian to relax and take his cue to open his mouth and roll his tongue against Mo Guan Shan’s, trying to ignore the jolts it was sending directly to his crotch.

Mo Guan Shan’s hands, that so far were still holding He Tian’s shirt, went up and his fingers tangled on He Tian’s hair, feeling how soft his strands were for the first time. He Tian seemed to like it, as he let a low moan out on Mo Guan Shan’s lips. He Tian also noticed that he could move, and his first decision was to lower his hands back to Mo Guan Shan’s waist, and then he risked bringing them even lower, to his hips.

When he finally reached for Mo Guan Shan’s hips, he got no red flags, which made him pull Mo Guan Shan’s body closer, pressing it against his own. It was only then that both boys noticed how their heartbeats had considerably increased its speed, how scorching their skins were and how stiff both of them were inside their pants.

Feeling He Tian’s dick against his in real life was nothing like inside his dreams, but Mo Guan Shan knew he couldn’t get carried away. He knew that no matter how much he wanted to keep drowning himself on He Tian’s lips and let him do anything he wanted, Mo Guan Shan had to take control of the situation and stop before it was too late.

He pushed He Tian lightly, parting their lips midway. Mo Guan Shan took a moment to admire He Tian’s usual pale skin now tinted in pink, and his thin lips swollen, red and wet. He Tian was a handsome boy and there was no denying, but he sure looked way more appealing like that.

“I guess you are going home now?” He Tian asked after he finally caught his breath.

“Yeah.” Mo Guan Shan answered still a little bit breathless. “My mom knows I’m here, but I’m pretty sure she’s worried.”

“Sure, of course.” He Tian agreed, still lightheaded. “I guess we’ll see each other tomorrow at school, then?” He opened the door and waited for Mo Guan Shan to come, which didn’t take long.

“Yes, we will.” Mo Guan Shan said. “Good night.” And right before turning around and leaving He Tian’s house, Mo Guan Shan leaned in and kissed him again, trying to control himself in order to not make it last too long.

Soon, he was entering the elevator, while a smiling He Tian waved him goodbye.

Damn, he could get addicted to that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No teasing this time, we finally got ourselves a kiss. Or two.
> 
> Happy now?
> 
> Stay tuned for the last chapter: Trust.
> 
> See you all soon~
> 
> Pops' out~


	5. Hesitation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mo Guan Shan hesitates and He Tian feels insecure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey-oh~
> 
> I took my damn sweet time, but I am FI-NA-LLY 100% happy with this chapter.
> 
> I had to re-write some parts, but in the end everything worked out.
> 
> Another block of text for you all <3
> 
> Enjoy!~

The following day was a Tuesday.

Mo Guan Shan woke up with the annoying sound of his alarm clock ringing on his right ear. He raised his body slowly, his fingers rubbing his sleepy eyes while his brain was starting to function properly. It didn’t take long for him to remember the events from the previous day, and Mo Guan Shan couldn’t help but to sigh contently. Soon he got up and stretched his back and limbs, feeling lightheaded afterwards.

“Guan Shan!” He heard his mother calling him from the kitchen. “Are you awake?”

“Just got up.” He shouted back to her. “I’ll have breakfast in a minute.”

She didn’t answer back, and with that Mo Guan Shan knew she wouldn’t bother him, as long as he wasn’t late for school, at least. Mo Guan Shan finished tidying his bed and left his bedroom, joining his mom for breakfast.

The small woman seemed like she was beaming with happiness, not even trying to hide her giggles or smiles. Mo Guan Shan surely noticed his mother’s slightly odd behavior, and something inside him said that the reason had a name and a very handsome face.

“What?” Mo Guan Shan asked after the thousandth time she looked at him.

“You are smiling.” She pointed and only then Mo Guan Shan realized that indeed he was smiling.

“Can’t I?” He asked, defensive.

“But of course you can.” Her smile only grew wider when she stated it. “You didn’t tell me what happened yesterday, though.”

“You were already sleeping when I got back.”

“Then tell me now.” She giggled, extremely excited about her son’s love life.

“It was a disaster.” Mo Guan Shan laughed. His laughter increased when his mother’s expression turned confused. “I got there, but I couldn’t knock on the door. I lost all of my courage.”

“Are you serious?”

“Yeah, but Cuntou told He Tian I was there.”

“So you did talk.” Even though she affirmed, her tone was doubtful.

“We had to.” Mo Guan Shan shrugged. “I basically just appeared at his doorstep just a few hours after saying I needed some space.”

“Why would you say that?” Mo Guan Shan’s mother dropped her chopsticks on the table, looking even more confused at her son.

“Because I didn’t know what was happening to me.” He sighed. “He Tian’s presence was good, but it was, I don’t know, suffocating me.

“Ok.” She agreed, her side moving from one side to the other, pondering. “And how did it go, after all?”

“It went well.” The smile came back to Mo Guan Shan’s lips. “He likes me.”

“That’s wonderful!” She clapped her hands happily, her eyes suddenly growing mischievous. “Did he kiss you?” He giggled question made Mo Guan Shan’s face flush red and him choke on the soup broth. “I’ll take that as a yes.”

“Mom!” Mo Guan Shan whined after cleaning, with a napkin, the mess he made. “I’m gonna get ready for school.”

Mo Guan Shan shook his head lightly and left the kitchen, half annoyed by his mother’s teasing, half happy because she was accepting everything. He sighed one last time and decided to get going, entering the bathroom and brushing his teeth. In less than ten minutes he was dressed and ready to leave.

Before he could leave his bedroom, though, his cellphone buzzed with a new text message, which Mo Guan Shan was seventy percent sure of from whom it was.

‘ _Come to the balcony real quick_.’ It said. As Mo Guan Shan initially suspected, it was from He Tian.

He didn’t answer the message. Mo Guan Shan just put his phone on his track pants pocket and opened the curtains and the glass door, walking in the balcony right after. When he looked down, towards the street, he noticed He Tian waving at him, a huge smile sitting on his lips. Mo Guan Shan wasn’t really expecting He Tian to be there, so he just got confused.

“What are you doing here?” He asked, ruder than he planned to.

“Always so cold.” He Tian said on a mocking tone, his tongue clicking.

“So?”

“I just wanted to be nice.” Mo Guan Shan could swear he would hate the next words, as He Tian’s smile grew wider. “I also wanted to walk to school with my girlfriend.”

And for once Mo Guan Shan’s gut was right, he did hate what He Tian said. When he noticed, he was shouting ‘ _Fuck you, He Tian_ ’ so loud the whole building could hear, while he threw his backpack on He Tian, aiming for his head. It didn’t really work because the bag was light and He Tian’s reflexes were on point, so he just caught the backpack before it could hit him. Mo Guan Shan’s hysteria also caused his mother to enter his room and walk to the balcony.

“Language, Guan Shan.” She said on a faked angry tone.

“Good morning, auntie.” He Tian said from below, attracting her attention.

“Oh, good morning student He.” She smiled once more, patting her son on the back. “Did you come to pick Guan Shan up?”

“Yes.”

“Great!” her smile grew bigger as she turned to Mo Guan Shan. “Go, go, don’t make him wait.” As soon as she saw her son walk towards He Tian, about a minute later, she waved goodbye. “Have fun~”

As soon as Mo Guan Shan’s mother had left the balcony, he turned to He Tian and tried getting his backpack. Every time he would try, however, He Tian would pull the bag away from his grasp, ending up holding it above his head while Mo Guan Shan tried reaching it, unsuccessfully. Mo Guan Shan was so focused in getting his backpack, muttering curses and calling He Tian a tall jerk, that he only noticed how close they were when he felt a pair of lips over his.

Mo Guan Shan’s reaction was immediate. He pushed He Tian, red from head to toe, and covered his mouth, completely embarrassed. He Tian laughed soundly, amused with the reaction, and gave Mo Guan Shan his bag back, keeping his teasing comments for himself, even though he wanted to say them out loud.

He Tian also wanted to hold Mo Guan Shan’s hand as they walked, but he waited for Mo Guan Shan to reach for his, which eventually happened. It was only when they were close to school grounds that Mo Guan Shan untangled their hands.

* * *

“Hey, Redhead.” Mo Guan Shan heard a known voice calling his nickname on a suspicious whisper.

“What do you want?” He asked using his usual rude tone, not bothering looking at Jian Yi.

“I know I joked on Sunday and everything…” Jian Yi said, still in that low voice, sitting beside Mo Guan Shan while he talked. “But I saw it again today.”

“Saw what?”

“You and He Tian.” The moment Jian Yi mentioned He Tian’s name, Mo Guan Shan’s body froze, as he didn’t know exactly what Jian Yi was implying.

“And?”

“You know,” Jian Yi shrugged, “When I saw you two at He Tian’s house, I honestly thought you had lost a bet or something. “He explained. “It’s not like you’d hold hands with He Tian willingly.”

“But?” Mo Guan Shan took a deep breath, already knowing where this conversation was heading to.

“I saw you two holding hands on your way to school, and you seemed pretty damn ok with it.” Jian Yi just talked nonchalant, while looking at Mo Guan Shan, who was white as a sheet. “I’d even say you looked used to it.”

“What’s it to you?” Mo Guan Shan shouted while standing up. He left while leaving a dumbfounded Jian Yi behind.

Mo Guan Shan walked in the school, being drown by the loud noises of girls giggling. Those sounds lead him to a classroom, where he found He Tian sitting on a chair and surrounded by about fifteen girls. More than last time. But contrary to the last time, He Tian raised his hand, telling Mo Guan Shan to come closer with the movement of his index finger. Mo Guan Shan didn’t come closer, and instead of saying something, he just tilted his head, pointing at the corridor.

It was more than enough for He Tian to understand what Mo Guan Shan wanted, so as soon as Mo Guan Shan disappeared through the halls, He Tian left the unhappy squeaks of the girls asking him where he was going behind, and followed Mo Guan Shan. Mo Guan Shan just ignored the vein popping on his forehead when he heard He Tian calling him by his pet name and only kept walking.

“We’re not supposed to be here.” He Tian said right after crossing the rooftop doors, his hand reaching for the cigarette pack lost in his pocket, and a lighter. “It’s prohibited.” He chuckled, lighting a cigarette and inhaling deeply.

“So is smoking.” Mo Guan Shan rolled his eyes, walking to the guardrail and leaning his arms on it.

“Tell me.” He Tian’s voice was lower than usual, and Mo Guan Shan noticed he was closer. “You never come after me on school grounds, why today?” He laughed and blew a small cloud of smoke. “Miss me already?”

“You’re too full of yourself.” Mo Guan Shan spat nervous, but still feeling his voice going soft. “When I realized I was there.”

“And what happened?” He Tian flicked the cigarette, watching the ashes fall all the way down.

“Nothing.”

“It doesn’t look like nothing to me, though.” Mo Guan Shan didn’t have to look at He Tian to know he was carrying that annoying smug grin, or to notice he was much closer.

“It’s nothing much.” He re-worded, pretty much aware that He Tian was right behind him.

“Then it’s ok to tell me.” He Tian whispered, his mouth close to Mo Guan Shan’s ear and his hands on the guardrail, trapping Mo Guan Shan.

“Let me go.” Mo Guan Shan ignored He Tian and snarled instead, turning around and trying to get away from the arms trapping him.

“Kiss me.” He Tian smirked and one of his hands left the rail, his fingers holding the cigarette as he inhaled and exhaled the smoke. Mo Guan Shan took the opportunity to get away, but before he could, He Tian held him in place with his body.

“We’re at school.” Mo Guan Shan muttered, his cheeks burning in shame. He wanted to kiss He Tian, but not there.

It was dangerous.

“Yeah, but there’s no one here besides us.”

“Shit, He Tian.” Mo Guan Shan tried to think of a retort, but he knew that argument was long lost.

“What a foul mouth.” He Tian grinned and put out the cigarette on the guardrail, letting the butt fall on the ground. He then stepped forward, pressing his knee between Mo Guan Shan’s legs and their chests against one another. “Kiss me.”

And with all of his defenses crumbling under He Tian’s touch and voice, Mo Guan Shan could only comply. There really wasn’t anybody nearby to witness, so he felt only a little tiny bit at ease, and that was the only reason – or so he told himself – why he held He Tian by the nape and pressed their lips together. It was almost an innocent kiss, just a little nibble of mouths touching lightly, and Mo Guan Shan wanted to keep it at that. So when He Tian tried deepening the kiss, Mo Guan Shan pushed him away, parting their lips.

“Why?” He Tian asked.

“Because…” Mo Guan Shan answered and took advantage of He Tian’s lower guard to get away from his grasp, literally saved by the persistent ringing bell. “We gotta go to class.”

“You damn tease.” He Tian mumbled, contemplating the idea of skipping the afternoon classes.

Mo Guan Shan just shrugged, opening the rooftop door and going through it, walking directly to his classroom. Fortunately he got there in time, which gave him a small window of time to sit on his chair and check his phone, to see if there were any new messages. There weren’t any.

The first afternoon class went by as slowly as it could and the second was showing Guan Shan it would be as boring as the first one. It was only when the second class was halfway done that Mo Guan Shan felt his phone vibrating in his pocket. He took advantage that the teacher had his back turned to them, as he was writing something on the board, and he quickly got his cellphone, unlocking it and checking the message app.

‘ _Wanna skip class?_ ’ Was what He Tian’s text said.

‘ _No_.’ Mo Guan Shan typed a fast reply and tried to pay attention to the boring words his literature teacher said.

And then, another buzz.

‘ _Come on, Little Mo._ ’ Followed by. ‘ _I’m lonely._ ’

‘ _I don’t care_.’

‘ _I know you do_.’ Which cause Mo Guan Shan to roll his eyes.

‘ _I’m not going_.’ He sent instead of denying.

‘ _You care_.’

‘ _Shut up._ ’ Mo Guan Shan tried not to demonstrate his feelings with actions, as he would be in trouble if the teacher caught him texting while in class.

‘ _I’m still at the rooftop_.’

‘ _Good for you._ ’

‘ _I’m waiting for you._ ’

‘ _I’m not going._ ’

Finally, He Tian went silent. Mo Guan Shan didn’t care at first and just turned his attention back to the chalkboard. But soon he started getting annoyed because He Tian, whose nature was pushy, wasn’t being pushy at all. So Mo Guan Shan waited for the bell, took a deep breath, told the class president he wasn’t feeling well and needed to go to the nurse’s office, and then left the classroom.

When Mo Guan Shan got to the rooftop, he found He Tian lying down parallel to the guardrail, eyes closed and a cigarette dangling on his lips. Mo Guan Shan only knew that He Tian wasn’t sleeping because soon his fingers reached for the cigarette and he inhaled the smoke, blowing it shortly after. Mo Guan Shan shook his head and sat beside He Tian, his back pressed against the guardrail.

“I knew you’d come.” He Tian commented. His eyes were still closed and his lips carried his usual smug grin. He then outstretched his arm over the rooftop’s edge and flicked the cigarette butt, bringing it to his mouth again afterwards.

“Last Saturday you were saying how we had important mock exams this week, and that I needed a fast recovery option.” Mo Guan Shan ignored He Tian’s provocation. “Today you make me skip class.”

“I’m not making you do anything.” He Tian retorted, his eyes now open and his body raised, sitting beside Mo Guan Shan. “You are here out of your own will.”

“Whatever.” Mo Guan Shan scoffed. “You were taking advantage of my condition on Saturday, just confess.” And he ended up returning to the previous subject.

“Are you sure **I** was the one taking advantage, Mo Guan Shan?” He Tian asked with slitted eyes, his deep and low voice so dangerously close to Mo Guan Shan’s ear that he felt a shiver crawling up his spine.

After connecting the dots, Mo Guan Shan realized what He Tian meant, and his entire body froze on the spot. His demons came back to haunt him, whispering how he had had a wet dream and probably done unimaginable things in his sleep. Mo Guan Shan swallowed the lump in his throat and reached for He Tian’s hand, squeezing it lightly after their fingers intertwined.

“Did I do anything weird?” He asked hesitant, his voice failing him.

“Of course not.” He Tian laughed. “I’m just messing with you.”

“You piece of shit.” Mo Guan Shan spat, letting go of the hand and punching He Tian on his right arm.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever you say.” He Tian chuckled and kissed Mo Guan Shan lightly on the lips, then lying his head down on Mo Guan Shan’s lap afterwards.

“What are you doing?” Mo Guan Shan asked, not so sure on how to deal with He Tian.

“Getting comfortable.” He Tian smirked and brought the cigarette back to his mouth, inhaling a deep breath of smoke and puffing it all on Mo Guan Shan’s face when he exhaled.

“Don’t blow smoke on me, jerk.” Mo Guan Shan complained, swaying his hands in front of his face, dissipating the smoke cloud.

“Why not?”

‘ _Because it turns you on_.’ Was what the demons taunted. “Because it smells gross.” Was what Mo Guan Shan actually said.

“Hn.” He Tian seemed like he didn’t care, but he still put out the cigarette on the floor when Mo Guan Shan mentioned his disgust towards it. “Why did you come?” He asked, his right hand dangling over the rooftop’s edge and his left arm resting on his stomach.

“Class was boring.” Mo Guan Shan answered, not really looking at He Tian. He had his head leaning on the rail and his eyes looked at the sky.

“How boring?”

“Do you really have the need to keep talking?” Mo Guan Shan sort of snapped, his voice going a little louder and a vein popping on his forehead.

“You don’t want to?” He Tian looked at Mo Guan Shan, noticing that he seemed thoughtful and slightly angry.

“I’m not into talking at all.” Mo Guan Shan said, his voice lower and seemly calmer. “So just shut up, ok?”

He Tian didn’t answer. Mo Guan Shan looked down after noticing He Tian’s quietness, only to find him with his eyes closed, carrying a peaceful expression. Mo Guan Shan could almost admit how handsome He Tian looked when he was so relaxed, but of course he would never say it out loud. After suppressing a chuckle and shaking his head lightly, shooing those thoughts away, Mo Guan Shan started to notice how He Tian’s breath was quieter and quieter, his chest going up and down on a steady motion, his lips parted just a tiny bit and his eyes closed.

It was like He Tian had fallen asleep.

Mo Guan Shan wasn’t sure if He Tian was indeed sleeping, of course, and for some unknown reason he wanted to be sure. He decided to whisper He Tian’s name, surprising himself with his voice’s softness. After calling out He Tian five times with no answer whatsoever, Mo Guan Shan was sure that he was sleeping. It was the second time Mo Guan Shan saw He Tian sleeping, but this time he wasn’t worried about his health.

‘ _You were dead worried_.’ The annoying voices kept on provoking. ‘ _He broke all the walls you put over the years_.’ At this point Mo Guan Shan didn’t even fight the voices. ‘ _You let him in_.’

That last thought made Mo Guan Shan inhale deeply, still uncertain with how to deal with all the new things that were happening oh so fast. It was only then, after taking that deep breath, that Mo Guan Shan noticed how his fingers ran through He Tian’s hair, smoothing and straightening the strands. He thought about yanking his hand, but that would probably wake He Tian up, and he would tease Mo Guan Shan until the end of his days.

So Mo Guan Shan just sat there, feeling his leg go numb little by little while he caressed He Tian’s hair with such care and softness that Mo Guan Shan didn’t actually know he carried with him. It was only after an hour or so, when the last bell rang, that Mo Guan Shan retreated his hand slowly, bringing it to He Tian’s shoulder so he could shake it.

“What is it?” He Tian asked, his voice unusually sluggish as he yawned. Mo Guan Shan tried, but he couldn’t hold the laugh. “What are you laughing at?” He Tian than sat down, stretching his upper half body lazily.

“You are much more tolerable when you’re sleeping.” By Mo Guan Shan’s tone, it was clear he was partially joking. “The bell rang.”

“Oh, good.” He Tian stood up and stretched his legs, then looked at Mo Guan Shan, who was still sitting. “Let’s go?”

“I can’t.” Mo Guan Shan sighed, defeated.

“Why not?” He Tian’s question showed his confusion, not understanding what was going on.

The only answer He Tian got was a roll of eyes and a deep sigh. However, when Mo Guan Shan straightened his previously crossed legs and wiggled his feet, He Tian understood what was happening. He chose not to tease Mo Guan Shan that time, and instead he just dropped back down, kneeling in front of Mo Guan Shan and straddling him, but still without touching him. He Tian saw how it had startled Mo Guan Shan, yet to his amusement; Mo Guan Shan couldn’t run away.

He Tian raised his right hand to Mo Guan Shan’s face, tracing his cheek and jaw with the tip of his index fingers, and raising Mo Guan Shan’s face by the chin, when he got there. That movement made Mo Guan Shan look upwards, meeting He Tian’s intense gaze, piercing his eyes like daggers. Before Mo Guan Shan could open his mouth and complain about anything like he normally would, He Tian leaned in.

Even though it was only about the third or fourth time that He Tian kissed Mo Guan Shan, he still loved how Mo Guan Shan seemed angry at first, but soon gave in and reciprocated the kiss. He loved how Mo Guan Shan’s mouth moved against his, almost as if he was unsure on what he really should do. He loved how Mo Guan Shan’s tongue was first shy when touching his own, but would soon grow bold.

That was exactly what happened. Mo Guan Shan, who was initially in a mix of surprise and hesitation, soon started to correspond to the kiss. He Tian held back the growl that wanted to leave his throat when Mo Guan Shan’s lips pressed harder against his own, and when Mo Guan Shan’s hands found their way to his hair, tangling between the strands and massaging his scalp. He Tian’s right hand, the one that had traced Mo Guan Shan’s face before, mimed Mo Guan Shan’s action, grabbing Mo Guan Shan by the short and fuzzy hair near his nape, and brought his faces even closer, if that was physically possible.

He Tian’s left hand sustained his body by holding the rail, preventing him from falling on Mo Guan Shan, even though he wanted to. All both of them cared about at that moment was how their mouths fit together nicely, and how they could feel sparks all over their bodies every time their tongues met. Little by little those sparks became more and more frequent, as both of them just kept rolling their tongues on that open-mouthed and messy kiss.

Mo Guan Shan didn’t know if they were on the same kiss or the hundredth, but it didn’t really matter. What mattered was that his legs started to tingle, and the uncomfortable sensation made him move them upwards, which caused one of his knees to brush against He Tian’s inner thigh and crotch. That time it was impossible for He Tian not to moan, and when he realized the sweet pressure was gone, so were the lips against his.

“Let’s go?” Mo Guan Shan said out of breath while smoothening the imaginary wrinkles on his track pants. He was already standing up. “The bell rang a while ago.”

“Sure.” He Tian answered, one of his best smiles plastered on his face to hide his frustration. He quickly got up and followed Mo Guan Shan.

Right after they crossed the school gates, He Tian noticed that Mo Guan Shan was still by his side, walking shoulder to shoulder with him. Because he remembered Mo Guan Shan’s piercing comment about how much more tolerable He Tian was when he was quiet, He Tian decided not to say anything and just see where it all was going.

To his apartment, apparently, and still without saying a single word, Mo Guan Shan got inside the flat and went directly to the kitchen. He Tian, of course, followed him suit.

“Are you really making me dinner without me asking for it?” He Tian said while he sneaked behind Mo Guan Shan, who was chopping some vegetables. Mo Guan Shan only nodded. “What did I do to deserve it?”

Again, Mo Guan Shan didn’t vocalize his answer, only shrugging instead. He Tian then took the opportunity to get even closer to Mo Guan Shan, being only about two centimeters from pressing his body to Mo Guan Shan’s back. His hands slowly traced Mo Guan Shan’s arms while he worked, going up and down, up until He Tian finally felt bored and placed both of his hands on Mo Guan Shan’s hips, holding him – not really – in place.

When Mo Guan Shan felt the touch on his arms, he didn’t get bothered, It felt nice and comforting, and it didn’t get in his way of cooking. But when He Tian’s hands held him in place by the hips, Mo Guan Shan became hyper aware of their proximity, which made his entire body stiffen and a shiver go down his spine.

It only got worse when Mo Guan Shan felt He Tian’s lips hovering over the exposed skin of his nape. But contrary to what would be usual, when He Tian actually pressed his lips against Mo Guan Shan’s neck, Mo Guan Shan only placed the knife on the counter and closed his eyes, letting out a content sigh.

That felt relaxing.

Mo Guan Shan was enjoying He Tian’s kisses on his nape and on the curve of his neck – he had even tilted his head to give He Tian more access – when he felt something wet and warm going up his neck all the way to his left ear, and then teeth nibble on it. All of this was way too familiar, haunting and perverting his dreams, and Mo Guan Shan couldn’t help but to feel his dick start to harden inside his pants.

Red flag.

“Ever heard of personal space?” Mo Guan Shan mumbled after nudging He Tian away with his elbow, soon going back to his previous task.

He Tian only stood there, a foot away from Mo Guan Shan, watching his skilled hands working fast on the ingredients in complete confusion. As far as He Tian knew, Mo Guan Shan was enjoying his touches and kisses, yet it seemed like just as the things between them were starting to get more intimate, Mo Guan Shan would simply back away.

And that was the first time He Tian felt insecure.

In one moment Mo Guan Shan seemed to be all on board, at He Tian’s complete mercy, but on the following moment he was pushing He Tian away all flustered. Even though it was confusing and contradictory, and He Tian felt like asking Mo Guan Shan what was going on, he ended up not asking anything or backing away.

It didn’t take long for Mo Guan Shan to finish cooking dinner. After setting the table, he interrupted He Tian in whatever he was doing on his phone and sat at the table. To He Tian’s surprise, on that day in special, Mo Guan Shan sat beside him, instead of the usual in front of him. Those small details only fueled He Tian’s confusion more and more. If Mo Guan Shan liked him and wanted to be close to him, why was he also pushing He Tian away?

Why was he hesitating?

All of those questions remained unanswered as He Tian decided it was better to eat the dinner Mo Guan Shan had cooked instead of scaring him with countless questions. After eating, He Tian told Mo Guan Shan he was going to take a shower and made his way to the bathroom.

As soon as he was inside the bathroom, He Tian sighed deeply, letting a wave of thoughts hit him as he discarded his clothes. Soon he was completely naked and his head was under the warm water. He Tian couldn’t help but to think about Mo Guan Shan – who at that point would have already gone home.

Part of what was happening was just like a dream. He Tian was certain it would never happen, but there it was. The other part was hurtful, though. He Tian wanted to believe the ‘ _I do_ ’ Mo Guan Shan had said, but he couldn’t help to ask himself if Mo Guan Shan really liked him back. Because if he did, he wouldn’t keep pushing He Tian away, he wouldn’t refuse his advances. Would he?

Of course He Tian’s clouded thoughts were blinded by this new insecurity. They were so blinded that He Tian forgot completely about how shy Mo Guan Shan was, or how much he disliked being touched, yet he let He Tian touch him. He Tian even forgot how much Mo Guan Shan was disgusted by other people’s saliva, and there he was, kissing He Tian so eagerly he didn’t look like himself.

Ah, Mo Guan Shan’s lips. He Tian was one hundred percent aware of how fucked he was once he noticed his body reacting to the thought of Mo Guan Shan’s lips only. He didn’t care if they were thin, chapped and only spurt curses, all He Tian cared about was how he enjoyed how those lips would go silent and melt against his. Or how their tongues would intertwine, sending shivers up his spine and down his crotch.

“Shit.” He Tian mumbled, slightly pissed at how only the thought of Mo Guan Shan kissing him made him hard.

He Tian wasn’t the type to deny his deepest instincts, so when he noticed his on-growing erection, he decided he needed to take care of it. That being decided, He Tian lowered his hand to his member, palming it lightly until he was fully hard. When it finally happened, He Tian gripped his cock and started pumping it while his mind took him directly to his darkest desires.

It was hard to imagine the usual scowling Mo Guan Shan with a soft and needy expression, but it wasn’t impossible. So He Tian imagined it. He Tian imagined Mo Guan Shan with swollen and reddened lips, glistening with saliva. He Tian imagined Mo Guan Shan’s lean body flushed in both embarrassment and want. He Tian imagined Mo Guan Shan’s hard dick on his hands. He Tian imagined Mo Guan Shan’s stuttering voice hesitating and asking for more. He Tian imagined Mo Guan Shan’s ass rolling against his own hard cock.

Just like he had done in the nurse’s office while sleeping.

And, to He Tian’s surprise, the replay of that day, of Mo Guan Shan’s ass sliding his dick on the crack so painfully delicious it was enough to tip He Tian over the edge, making him come all over his hand and the bathroom’s wall tiles.

Then, after his climax high had finally dissipated, He Tian rinsed the wall and properly cleaned himself, stepping out of the shower shortly after. He dried his body and put on a clean set of boxers and sweatpants, and then left the bathroom while drying his hair, only to find the reason behind his madness sitting on his couch and playing videogames.

Mo Guan Shan hadn’t gone away.

With this new hope lit inside his heart, He Tian walked towards the couch and dropped right beside Mo Guan Shan, invading his personal space and giving him a soft peck on the right cheek. The kiss startled Mo Guan Shan a little, but he didn’t do or say anything, he just kept playing the game.

“I thought you’d be gone by now.” He Tian said lowly, leaning his head – that was still covered by the towel – on Mo Guan Shan’s shoulder. “Glad you didn’t.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Mo Guan Shan just shrugged nonchalant. “You took your damn time.” He added.

“Thinking about you.” He Tian retorted, making sure his voice was deeper and his lips close to Mo Guan Shan’s ear.

“Wha-?” Mo Guan Shan paused the game and looked puzzled at He Tian. Soon realization hit him and he understood what He Tian really meant, as he felt his eyes widen and his cheeks burn. Deep down, though, he knew he couldn’t judge.

He had done the same after all.

He Tian thought Mo Guan Shan would overreact with his implications, maybe even throw a tantrum and leave He Tian’s apartment thumping. He didn’t. Mo Guan Shan only looked at He Tian with a mix of incomprehensible feelings. Countless minutes later he dropped the controller beside him on the couch and grabbed He Tian’s face with both of his hands.

It was time for He Tian to not understand what was going on, speechless at Mo Guan Shan’s unexpected and contradictory actions. Every movement was decisive and He Tian didn’t know what to do, at last deciding to shut his thoughts down and listen to his gut instead. And doing what his gut told him to, He Tian leaned in and kissed Mo Guan Shan, his hands soon finding their way to Mo Guan Shan’s wait and bringing him closer.

And closer.

And closer.

So close that before any of them realized, Mo Guan Shan was already straddling He Tian, his ass pressing down on He Tian’s lap and their crotches almost touching. Thankfully, that detail didn’t stop either of them, who continued kissing each other with that hidden hunger that only showed up in moments like those.

However, when He Tian’s right hand circled Mo Guan Shan’s waist and ended up on his lower back, dangerously close to Mo Guan Shan’s butt, the red flag was raised once more.

“I already washed the dishes.” Mo Guan Shan said hasty as soon as their mouths parted. He was panting, but it didn’t seem to stop him from talking. “I should get going.”

“Stay.” He Tian asked. His hands travelled upwards and held Mo Guan Shan’s face between his palms, gingerly. “Stay with me.” He repeated.

“I can’t.” Mo Guan Shan mumbled, his only choice to avert his eyes from He Tian’s when he showed that unsettling sad expression. “I can’t.” Repeating his words, Mo Guan Shan had his eyes fixed on a random spot on his thighs, noticing the subtle bulge on both of their pants.

Mo Guan Shan wasn’t ready to take the next step. Not yet.

“Ok.” He Tian sighed at last. “You’re right, auntie also must be worried.”

Mo Guan Shan didn’t agree nor deny. He was glad He Tian had given in without too much of a fight. It sure would be nice if Mo Guan Shan could overcome his pride and tell He Tian what he was thinking, but he was still Mo Guan Shan, and Mo Guan Shan wasn’t open with his feelings. Mo Guan Shan also didn’t apologize, even though deep down he wanted to. The only thing Mo Guan Shan did, was to lean in and kiss He Tian once more.

That kiss wasn’t as near as heated as the previous ones, since Mo Guan Shan decided to keep his tongue for himself instead of adventuring exploring He Tian’s mouth. It was a chaste, innocent kiss that only left He Tian wanting more and more. But He Tian didn’t want to ravish Mo Guan Shan only to scare him off right afterwards. Not when Mo Guan Shan was finally his.

“Good night.” Mo Guan Shan whispered and got up, leaving the apartment before He Tian could call his name.

And He Tian was left to take care of his persistent boner all by himself.

Again.

* * *

Wednesday was colder than the previous days.

Mo Guan Shan woke up earlier than usual, once again tormented by a wet dream. Just like the other times, he woke up with a raging boner and a foul mood. Now that he actually knew how He Tian’s kisses felt, and what they did to him, it seemed like Mo Guan Shan’s imagination was pumped up with this new information and was as creative as ever. And vivid. Each dream was even realer than the previous and Mo Guan Shan felt like going crazy.

Especially after this one dream he had that night.

Because, of course, as soon as Mo Guan Shan got home, he locked himself in his bedroom and jerked off, his mind wandering and getting curious about other things. His computer was way too close and before he could stop himself, he was already hitting the enter key and searching.

What shocked Mo Guan Shan the most was exactly the fact that what he found out did NOT shock him at all. That deep down he already knew how it all worked.

He just wasn’t expecting dreaming about He Tian’s long fingers deep inside his ass and Mo Guan Shan actually liking it. He wasn’t expecting waking up with his boxers soaked in cum, but his dick still painfully hard. He wasn’t expecting that slowly he was getting curious about how it would feel if He Tian actually fingered – and fucked – him.

“Fucking hormones.” He hissed, getting under the hot spray after he entered the bathroom. “Damn you, He Tian.”

Mo Guan Shan kept on cursing He Tian as his left hand jerked his dick, while his right did what had become a little mania – teasing his nipples. He cursed between shagged breaths, hating his body and desires for being so lewd, and hating He Tian for fueling them. But it didn’t matter how much Mo Guan Shan said he hated it, he still masturbated and came while thinking of how it would feel if it was He Tian’s hand – or dick, or mouth – instead.

He would also get ashamed and guilty afterwards, knowing clearly that he was using He Tian as his jerk off material while he could just stop being a bitch and do it with him. But no, Mo Guan Shan’s insecurities had to be stronger than his desire.

After shooing the unpleasant thoughts away, Mo Guan Shan washed his shame and stepped out of the shower, drying his body and hair, and getting dressed. He then had breakfast with his mother, unable to stop thinking if He Tian would show up to walk to school with him. Even though it sounded sappy, Mo Guan Shan saw how that small and definitely cheese gesture meant a lot to show how He Tian felt about him.

And when he left the small apartment building, there was He Tian. He was leaning on a lamp post while smoking a cigarette, completely lost in his thoughts, and Mo Guan Shan couldn’t stop the thought of how handsome He Tian looked. With the ghost of questions he wanted to ask lingering in the back of his mind, Mo Guan Shan got closer, getting He Tian’s attention as soon as he was about two steps away.

“Good morning.” He Tian said after inhaling the last bit of tobacco he could, as the cigarette butt was already near the filter. His words danced on the air with the smoke, and Mo Guan Shan thought how tempting He Tian’s lips were.

“Morning.” Mo Guan Shan answered the greeting, chewing on his inner cheek to see if he could control the sudden urge to kiss He Tian. “There’s something bugging me.” Mo Guan Shan caught himself talking before thinking a few minutes after they started walking side by side.

“Which is?” He Tian asked, masking his surprise with a smirk.

“What are we?” Mo Guan Shan spurted the question he actually wanted to ask on the previous day, but didn’t because he was way too busy getting away from He Tian’s spell.

“What do you want us to be?” He Tian retorted instead of answering, leaving Mo Guan Shan confused. Once He Tian noticed Mo Guan Shan couldn’t answer on his own, he stopped walking and changed his words. “How serious are you about me?”

“As serious as you are about me.” Mo Guan Shan answered in a heartbeat, no hesitation whatsoever. As contradictory as usual.

“Good.” He Tian sighed in relief, ignoring the voice in the back of his head saying _is he, though?_ “Then if I said we were actually dating, you’d be ok with it.” He affirmed.

“Yes.” Still, Mo Guan Shan agreed. And He Tian felt like kissing him.

“Ah, Little Mo.” He Tian stretched his arms and resumed walking. “You make things **really hard** for me, did you know that?” He added, letting all of the double-meaning slip out of his tongue.

Mo Guan Shan, as He Tian suspected, didn’t answer anything. He only walked faster than He Tian in order to get ahead of him. But He Tian, as the annoying prick he loved to be, caught up with Mo Guan Shan and hugged him by the neck, just like the good old times. That time Mo Guan Shan didn’t try to get away from the touch, only getting rid of He Tian’s warmth when the bell rang and their classes began.

* * *

“You didn’t tell me how it went.” Buzzcut sat beside Mo Guan Shan, leaning his elbows on his knees. It was lunchtime.

“Fucking traitor.” Mo Guan Shan spat, not even looking at Buzzcut.

“I saw you with He Tian yesterday, so I guess it went well.” Buzzcut chose to ignore Mo Guan Shan’s sourness.

“What makes you think He Tian even believed you, in the first place?”

“It was a lucky guess.” Buzzcut shrugged. “Did he?”

“Unfortunately, yes.” Mo Guan Shan sighed.

“Are you two lovey-dovey, then?” Buzzcut teased, laughing at Mo Guan Shan’s disgusted expression.

“Gross.” He said and rolled his eyes. “We’re on good terms.”

“That’s good.” Buzzcut smiled to Mo Guan Shan, hiding his surprise when he saw such soft expressions on Mo Guan Shan’s normally harsh face. “Guess I helped, after all.”

“I hate to admit, but yeah, I guess so.”

“Did you kiss him, though?”

“What’s with everybody asking this damn question?” Mo Guan Shan snapped at last. “That’s none of your damn business, you fuck.”

“So you did.” Buzzcut laughed amused. “I’m happy for you, bro.” He said while giving Mo Guan Shan friendly pats on the shoulder. “Also glad you didn’t quit school, and you even got yourself a boyfriend.” He teased.

“Ah, fuck you, Cuntou!” Mo Guan Shan shouted, even though he wasn’t totally angry.

* * *

“Are you on cleaning duty again?” He Tian asked after entering Mo Guan Shan’s classroom. “I thought you’d be out of it for at least two weeks or so.”

“So did I.” Mo Guan Shan sighed as he finished wiping the board. He then put the blackboard eraser next to the chalks and grabbed the mop that was leaning against the teacher’s desk.

Mo Guan Shan started walking to the back of the classroom, but he was abruptly stopped when his feet tripped on something – He Tian’s own foot, which he had sneaked in front of Mo Guan Shan with this sole purpose – and he saw the world spin as he fell. Mo Guan Shan was waiting for the impact, but it never came. Instead, he saw himself being held by He Tian in an extremely compromising position.

It didn’t matter how much Mo Guan Shan squirmed and writhed, He Tian just wouldn’t let him go. So there he was, back semi-arched and He Tian’s whole body towering over his. Their faces were dangerously close and the classroom door was opened. _Anyone could just barge in and witness this_ , he heard the demons. _One of He Tian’s fans. Cuntou. She Li. A teacher._ The thought made Mo Guan Shan’s heart race in both fear and excitement.

He obviously didn’t want to get caught, to be a victim of rumors once more, but the possibility did add in to the thrill factor.

“Can I kiss you?” He Tian asked hesitant, aware that they were in a very delicate situation.

Yet again, Mo Guan Shan didn’t answer the question with words, but actions instead. He not only closed the gap between their lips, but he also circled his arms around He Tian’s neck and slipped his tongue inside He Tian’s mouth. He couldn’t believe he was now addicted to something that disgusted the hell out of him only a while back. It was a great improvement and He Tian was more than glad to be the one to help.

Soon He Tian straightened their bodies, leaning his butt on one of the desks and bringing Mo Guan Shan’s body closer. One kiss led to another and neither of them knew how much time they actually spent kissing, but as soon as Mo Guan Shan’s prude mind decided to remind him about the open door, he pushed He Tian lightly. Their bodies were still close, though, and Mo Guan Shan could feel the lingering touch of He Tian’s lips on his.

“I need to finish cleaning the classroom.” He said taking one step backwards.

“I’ll help you.” He Tian offered.

“Can you, though?” Mo Guan Shan mocked, bending over to grab the mop that had fallen from his grasp at some point.

“If you keep being a smart-ass, I’m not gonna help you.”

“I’m used to do it alone, anyway.” Mo Guan Shan shrugged. “They always ditch me.”

He Tian helped.

“Are you doing anything today?” He Tian asked as they stored the bucket, the mop and other stuff in the broom closet.

“I was seriously thinking about studying.” Mo Guan Shan waited for He Tian to burst in laughter, but he never did.

“Oh, the mock tests start tomorrow.”

“Yeah.”

“Tsk.” He Tian clicked his tongue. “I’d say I can help you, but I would probably just keep trying to kiss you over and over.”

“I’m pretty much aware of that.” Mo Guan Shan agreed. “So I guess you’re not bugging me today.”

“No.” He Tian smiled. “Not today.”

But of course He Tian dragged Mo Guan Shan to a deserted bathroom and drowned on his lips for another half an eternity before being shoved away and saying goodbye to a fuming redhead only because his hands roamed way too low.

Kissing was ok.

Sitting on his – He Tian’s – lap was ok to some extent.

Grabbing his – Mo Guan Shan’s – butt was a total no-no.

And Mo Guan Shan’s hesitation was only pissing He Tian off.

* * *

On the following day, the mock tests began.

Mo Guan Shan walked to school with He Tian for the third day in a row, and that left Mo Guan Shan wondering if people weren’t noticing how close they had become, or if they were just ignoring it. Either way, Mo Guan Shan didn’t really care about other people, as long as he didn’t need to deal with any rumors.

He Tian wished Mo Guan Shan good luck on the tests before he walked to his own classroom, deciding to not bother Mo Guan Shan too much before they were done with the tests. The first half of the day went by smoothly and fast, as He Tian didn’t have any difficulties with the tests, and soon it was their first break from the tests – lunchtime. He Tian was dying to have some alone time with Mo Guan Shan, but apparently his many fangirls weren’t thinking the same thing as they surrounded him, asking him countless questions about the mock tests and other stuff.

He just kept answering the questions mindlessly, not really putting any thought to it, and commenting the usual. The girls didn’t seem to catch his drift and notice he wanted to go away, and He Tian was praying for Mo Guan Shan to actually pop in the classroom and drag him away, as he had done before.

To He Tian’s surprise, his prayers were actually attended. But instead of an angry redhead, he was saved by a smiley blonde. And even more surprising than Jian Yi coming to talk to him in school grounds, was that he was alone. Zhan Zheng Xi wasn’t anywhere to be seen.

“I really want to talk to you.” Jian Yi said. “I’m gonna steal this guy from you all ok? Bye” He added hasty, dragging He Tian out of the classroom and to the stairs.

He Tian never knew how the staircase was actually deserted during lunchtime.

“What’s going on between you and Redhead?” He asked.

“You should ask this to _Don’t Close Mountain_.” He Tian answered, his hands itching for a cigarette.

“I tried.” Jian Yi rolled his eyes. “He only pushes me away.”

“Yeah, he does that to me too.”

“He didn’t do that yesterday, though.” Jian Yi commented. He looked at He Tian with the corner of his eyes, analyzing his actions.

“What do you mean?”

“I just wanna know what kind of dark magic you are doing behind everybody’s backs.” Jian Yi was uneasy and He Tian could catch that easily.

“You need to be more specific.”

“When you said you had kissed someone, it was Redhead, right?” Jian Yi then changed the course of the conversation, confusing He Tian even more.

“What does it has to do with me doing black magic?”

“It’s unfair!” Jian Yi snapped. “You’ve known him for a month; I’ve known Zhan Xixi for years. For ten fucking years.”

“Jian Yi.” He Tian said, low and oddly calm. “Breath and organize those ideas because I’m not following.”

“Was it Redhead?” Jian Yi asked, calmer.

“What was him?”

“That you kissed.”

“Yes.” He Tian answered. “But it was a mess.” He added later. “He didn’t want to kiss me.”

“Are you sure?” Jian Yi cocked an eyebrow, not buying it.

“Back then, yes.” He Tian sighed. “What did you see yesterday?”

“You two in Redhead’s classroom.” Jian Yi turned around and leaned his back on the wall. “He didn’t seem to mind kissing you.”

“That’s because we’re dating now.” He Tian shrugged.

“And how in the hell did you do that?” Jian Yi snapped once again, grabbing his light strands and pulling them in despair. “I’ve even confessed to Zhan Xixi and he does nothing!”

“It’s different.” He Tian turned to Jian Yi, his side leaning on the wall. “Those two relationships are really different.”

“What do you mean?”

“How did your friendship with Zhan Zheng Xi began?” He Tian asked.

“In kindergarten, I was alone.”

“He was your first friend; he is your best friend.” He Tian stated. “Mo Guan Shan hated me just two weeks ago.”

“How did he stop hating you, then?”

“I don’t know, honestly.” He Tian’s confession made Jian Yi look at him confused. “I don’t really know if it was something I said or something I did, but at some point, something changed.” Jian Yi wanted to say something, but He Tian kept going. “We never actually got to act like friends, though.”

“Are you sure?”

“Using Mo Guan Shan’s own words, he was just putting up with me, with us all.” He Tian said. “What he wanted the most was to get rid of me.”

“Really?” Jian Yi couldn’t believe He Tian’s words.

“Yes.” He Tian confirmed, dropping his all might mask for a split second. “But as I said, you and Zhan Zheng Xi are different.”

“I guess so…”

“You were talking about him when you asked about kissing, right?”

“I was.” Jian Yi confessed. “He didn’t hate me, though.” He sighed and resumed walking. “Not even when I told him I liked him, he never hated me.”

“How did he react?”

“He just said he knew it.” Jian Yi chuckled sadly. “But I ain’t no fucking sci-fi movie character, so that didn’t necessarily mean he likes me back.”

“Haha.” He Tian laughed.

“He just confuses me, you know?” Jian Yi asked, but as soon as he would resume talking, the words died in his mouth. He Tian then followed Jian Yi’s gaze and saw Zhan Zheng Xi at the bottom of the stair case.

Zhan Zheng Xi didn’t even say a single word. He just climbed the stairs, grabbed Jian Yi by the arm and climbed back down, glaring at He Tian while he dragged Jian Yi with him. He Tian could only laugh at how Zhan Zheng Xi was oblivious to his own feelings, and how he could notice Jian Yi was finally realizing what was really going on.

But thankfully, He Tian was finally free from both his fangirls and Jian Yi’s whining, so he could finally go look for Mo Guan Shan. Or that was what he thought, because as soon as he climbed the first step down, the first bell rang, announcing that he should go back to his class to do another batch of extremely boring mock tests.

* * *

“ _Don’t Close Mountain_.” He Tian said while entering Mo Guan Shan’s classroom. “How did it go?”

“That’s a name you haven’t called me in a while.” Mo Guan Shan raised his brow. “Are you really asking me that?”

“That bad?” He Tian teased, receiving a death glare from Mo Guan Shan.

“I’m not a fucking genius like some people.” Mo Guan Shan finished putting his pencil case in his bag and closed it, his eyebrow twitching in anger.

“Do you want me to study with you, then?” He Tian offered, but as soon as he noticed it would be denied for obvious reasons, he added. “At your home, your mother will be there. If we keep the door opened I will have to control myself.” He chuckled.

Mo Guan Shan pondered for a second. Yes, that would be a good plan and maybe studying with He Tian would probably help him, even if just a tiny bit. Still, He Tian didn’t know that Mo Guan Shan’s mother knew about them, and Mo Guan Shan didn’t want He Tian to find out about that anytime soon, since both of them would most probably gang up to tease Mo Guan Shan. Besides that, with his mother knowing, Mo Guan Shan knew that even though He Tian controlled himself, Mo Guan Shan wasn’t sure if he could also be controlled.

“It’s not like studying the day before is gonna help me much.” Mo Guan Shan gave a lame excuse, leaving the classroom and being followed by He Tian.

“What a shame, I really wanted to have dinner at your house.” He Tian said that and Mo Guan Shan felt a shiver, he really couldn’t have He Tian having dinner at his home.

“Nope.” He denied He Tian’s self invitation. “If you want something, I’m cooking for you, at **your** place.” Mo Guan Shan added.

He Tian ended up accepting Mo Guan Shan’s half-hearted offer, yes he still felt like something had trespassed him. He Tian wanted to talk to Mo Guan Shan’s mother, learn a little bit more about the sides Mo Guan Shan never showed him, and Mo Guan Shan’s instant denial felt like he didn’t want He Tian to come near; it felt like he didn’t want He Tian to know more about him.

That, of course, hurt He Tian as bad as when Mo Guan Shan said he was just putting up with their relationship. And again, it was another heavy blow to He Tian’s already shaken confidence. But as usual, instead of turning to Mo Guan Shan and asking him questions, He Tian settled with was consuming him from the inside-out: bottling up.

In the end Mo Guan Shan did go to He Tian’s place to make him dinner, calling his mom on his way to tell her he was going to get home later than usual. Mo Guan Shan also had to control his blush like mad when his mother started teasing him, and when she told him he should bring He Tian over so they could talk, Mo Guan Shan felt like hanging up. He didn’t, though; he just dismissed his mom in a way He Tian wouldn’t understand what was going on and kept walking.

* * *

Friday was almost like a perfect copy of Thursday. Just another boring day full of tests in which He Tian tried to get away from the girls to meet Mo Guan Shan, but only saw himself free when it was already late in the afternoon. Yet again, when he invited himself to have dinner at Mo Guan Shan’s place, he was promptly refused, and for a second time Mo Guan Shan offered to cook for him.

He Tian didn’t hate it, of course, but he felt rejected to some extent. It was nice when Mo Guan Shan went to his house, since it always ended up in a make out sessions, still it looked like Mo Guan Shan was hiding something. To add to He Tian’s suspicion, Mo Guan Shan would also keep backing away every single time they would get more intimate, when He Tian could see – and feel – clearly that Mo Guan Shan’s body was also reacting.

All of this resulted in He Tian realizing that he was talking more frequently to Jian Yi, of all people, and that even though Jian Yi had come to him for advice first, He Tian was the one seeking for Jian Yi’s – not so – wise words. Little by little He Tian was also noticing that he was partially wrong on his first judgment of Jian Yi, and that yes, Jian Yi actually saw him as a friend.

Zhan Zheng Xi, on the other hand, didn’t. He wasn’t rude or anything towards He Tian, but He Tian knew that Zhan Zheng Xi absolutely hated when Jian Yi sought for He Tian’s company rather than his own, and this entire situation was just too funny to He Tian. Zhan Zheng Xi kept oblivious to his true feelings and He Tian didn’t feel like meddling with it, but slowly Jian Yi was starting to read between the lines.

But He Tian didn’t care about how Jian Yi and Zhan Zheng Xi were doing; he was much more worried about his own relationship with Mo Guan Shan. It didn’t matter how Mo Guan Shan still held his hand and still kissed him, He Tian couldn’t help but to feel all of those waves of insecurity hitting him day after day his advances kept being denied.

And like that, after two weeks, He Tian felt like he was going to explode.

Everybody knows that bottling up feelings isn’t good and He Tian knew that better than anyone, but there he was, keeping everything to himself. He would eventually talk to Jian Yi about how he felt Mo Guan Shan was cold towards him, but he would never actually confess that he was afraid Mo Guan Shan didn’t like him back. But He Tian was at his breaking point.

That breaking point – or was it more like and explosion? – was so bad that He Tian caught himself telling Jian Yi everything. From the very first time he messed with Mo Guan Shan, up until their most recent encounter.

He Tian told Jian Yi about the threats and the phone calls. About the dick picture and the tomato incident. About kissing Mo Guan Shan against his will and fighting She Li for him. About holding hands and giving him a guitar. About playing basketball together and going to the cinema. About being there when Mo Guan Shan had a panic attack and getting him a part time job. About confessing and giving him a pair of earrings. About being pushed away and kissing him. About telling him how he liked Mo Guan Shan, but never getting a real answer back.

He Tian opened his heart to Jian Yi.

And, to He Tian’s surprise, Jian Yi tried to help.

* * *

‘ _You never played the guitar for me._ ’ He Tian said in the most recent of the many texts he had sent Mo Guan Shan that Wednesday.

‘ _You never brought that up again_.’ Mo Guan Shan retorted and placed his phone back on his bed, going back to practice the new song he was learning to play.

‘ _Remember when we played basketball together?_ ’ Mo Guan Shan’s cellphone buzzed and he sighed defeated, knowing that He Tian wouldn’t leave him alone until he was done. He apparently wasn’t.

‘ _We played basketball together many times already._ ’ Mo Guan Shan answered.

‘ _The first time._ ’

Mo Guan Shan looked at his cellphone for a couple of minutes, his fingers hovering over the keyboard while he thought of an answer. He didn’t need to be an astrophysicist to know what He Tian really meant with that message. Mo Guan Shan knew they had made a bet that day and that he had lost. He also knew He Tian hadn’t used his winner powers yet. Up until now.

‘ _Yes._ ’ He settled with.

‘ _I want you to take the guitar to school tomorrow and play a song._ ’

He Tian’s wish was vague and perfect for Mo Guan Shan to keep running away, which was the only reason why he smiled victorious while typing ‘ _Ok_ ’ back to He Tian, without even thinking twice.

* * *

Mo Guan Shan did take the guitar to school. He did exactly what He Tian had basically ordered him to, but of course he wouldn’t make things easy for He Tian. So that resulted in Mo Guan Shan avoiding He Tian like the plague for the whole day. He Tian never said he had to play a song _for him_ after all. His order was as clear as water. Mo Guan Shan just needed to bring the guitar to school and play a song on school grounds. It wasn’t like anyone had to witness.

Naïve Mo Guan Shan was naïve.

What Mo Guan Shan wasn’t expecting was He Tian to find him just as he started playing the song. And to his misfortune, He Tian wasn’t alone. But he had lost a bet and he had a very big pride to take care off, so when he saw He Tian – and the dozen girls that followed him – crossing the rooftop’s door as he played the first chords, Mo Guan Shan didn’t back away.

He just pretended he hadn’t seen any of them and kept playing the guitar, which made Mo Guan Shan miss the many gasps leaving the girls’ mouths, or He Tian’s stunned expression. Mo Guan Shan only noticed something was odd when he finished playing and finally had the guts to look up, facing He Tian and his fangirls.

“Cat got your tongue?” It was Mo Guan Shan’s turn to tease He Tian when he realized He Tian wouldn’t say anything if nobody talked to him first.

“I…” He Tian trailed off, speechless.

“That was beautiful.” One of the girls commented, earning both Mo Guan Shan and He Tian’s attention. “I didn’t know you could play the guitar.”

“And sing.” Another one added.

“You should show that side of yours more often.” A third girl said. “People are often afraid of you because you’re always glaring at everybody.” She smiled.

“I guess that covers the bet we had.” Mo Guan Shan coughed, cleaning anything that was caught in his throat to mask his embarrassment. He took the guitar and slipped it back in its case. “I’m going home.”

He Tian didn’t say anything.

He felt like if he tried to open his mouth or move, he would probably end up confessing to Mo Guan Shan – for the umpteenth time, but now in front of all of his fans. Worse than that, He Tian wouldn’t be able to control himself and he would kiss Mo Guan Shan, again, in front of all of his fans. He couldn’t risk Mo Guan Shan overreacting and pushing him away even further, so he just stayed there, as still as a statue.

“Are you ok, He Tian?” One of the girls asked after seeing that He Tian was standing still with the same expression for solid five minutes.

“ _Fuck_.” Was the only thing He Tian managed to say.

Mo Guan Shan did have He Tian wrapped around his little finger.

* * *

When they talked through message, later that day, He Tian mentioned how much Mo Guan Shan had impressed him. That he figured Mo Guan Shan could play the guitar, by the way he looked longing at it, but he didn’t know Mo Guan Shan could sing so well. Not only that, He Tian also mentioned the surprisingly large amount of compliments Mo Guan Shan had received from He Tian’s fans.

Mo Guan Shan, who was already back at home and sitting on his bed with the guitar on his lap, had mixed feelings about everything. One side of him was happy that he had finally shown He Tian his ‘hidden talent’, but the other was extremely annoyed that He Tian had to bring a horde of uncontrollable girls with him. There would be gossip, Mo Guan Shan knew there would be, and he hated being the center of it.

All he wanted was to keep being a wallflower. Yet, for the third time in that year, Mo Guan Shan’s name would be on the lips of every single student by the following morning.

* * *

For Mo Guan Shan’s demise and He Tian and Jian Yi’s amusement, Mo Guan Shan was right about his assumption. His name did indeed end up on the lips of every single student – and teacher even – at school, and all he wanted was a paper bag to hide his face in it. People who would never talk to him normally, people who would look at him as if he was the worst person in the world just walked up to him and said how they wanted to hear the singer all the girls were talking about.

“I’m sorry, but he only does private shows and I’ve booked him for the rest of eternity.” He Tian joked once, receiving gasps and chuckles as an answer, as well as Mo Guan Shan storming out of the classroom they were while cursing up until He Tian’s seventh generation.

Mo Guan Shan’s usual annoyed and snappy self was even angrier that day in special, especially after a combination of maddening matters. Because of the girls, who somehow noticed about their proximity, He Tian couldn’t get near Mo Guan Shan, and even though Mo Guan Shan wanted that, he also didn’t have the guts to search for He Tian on his own. Every time He Tian mentioned how he wanted to have dinner at Mo Guan Shan’s house, Mo Guan Shan ended up at He Tian’s cooking for him, which always led to an intense make out session on He Tian’s couch.

Of course, however, every single one of those make out sessions ended up with a flustered Mo Guan Shan running away. And although He Tian was pissed at it – which Mo Guan Shan didn’t know, Mo Guan Shan was as pissed as well. He just wanted to overcome his fear and let He Tian do whatever he wanted to him, but every time he told himself ‘ _Today is the day_ ’, the demons would retort with ‘ _Is it, though?_ ’

Lastly, to put the cherry on top of this messy cake, there were the dreams. Mo Guan Shan’s recurrent wet dreams were realer and realer every night and he caught himself having to buy a whole new set of underwear, after the seventh pair basically ruined by an intense night of dreaming. Besides that, Mo Guan Shan also caught himself buying the last thing in the world he thought he would ever buy.

He blamed it on curiosity, of course. Mo Guan Shan would never, willingly, buy lube unless he was madly curious about how did it feel. And after what were about six days and a half rolling the bottle on his fingers and doing a lot of research, Mo Guan Shan actually created the guts to use it for its purpose and finger himself.

The first time was a disaster.

The second time was bad, but better than the first.

The third time started to show Mo Guan Shan the appeal.

It was only on the fourth Mo Guan Shan understood why people would think about using their asses for sex.

That, obviously, he would never tell He Tian about, as he could imagine the endless string of teasing that would never cease to happen. But thanks to that, Mo Guan Shan was slowly seeing himself able to give in to He Tian’s touches – even after he made the mistake of bringing his fangirls with him to the rooftop while Mo Guan Shan was singing. (He would never forgive He Tian for that). Still, as Mo Guan Shan was nothing but a coward, he needed a small push. Just a little shove.

“I don’t get you.” Jian Yi said, walking in Mo Guan Shan’s classroom at lunchtime. He was alone. “I don’t know what you want.”

“What’s it to you?” Mo Guan Shan retorted his, by now, mechanical answer.

“I know what’s going on between you and He Tian.” Jian Yi commented as Mo Guan Shan’s eyes widened. “I saw enough for it to become impossible for He Tian to lie to me.” He added.

“That’s none of your business.” Mo Guan Shan spat, trying to control the blush creeping on his ears.

“I’m pretty damn aware it isn’t, Redhead.” Jian Yi sighed, trying to be someone he wasn’t, someone calm. He pulled a chair and sat on it, his arms leaning on the chair backrest. “But He Tian is my friend and I’m done seeing him miserable.”

Those were two statements Mo Guan Shan thought he would never hear coming out of Jian Yi’s mouth. The first one because of that late night confession of He Tian’s, saying that Jian Yi and Zhan Zheng Xi only wanted to get rid of him. It wasn’t true, after all. Still, the shocking one was the second. Mo Guan Shan couldn’t understand why He Tian would even be miserable. He had never shown his miserable side to Mo Guan Shan. Not after that very first night, at least.

“I can see that you are confused.” Jian Yi started talking once more when he noticed all he would get from Mo Guan Shan was a cocked eyebrow and a confused expression. “By now you must know how He Tian is the mask master, Redhead, come on.”

“Well…” Mo Guan Shan hesitated. “Yeah.”

“Point is,” Jian Yi decided to cut to the chase and spill the beans. “He Tian’s been bottling stuff up, because of you-”

“I didn’t do anything.” Mo Guan Shan interrupted Jian Yi, assuming his defensive position.

“And that’s exactly the problem.” Jian Yi shrugged, only ignoring how much he wanted to punch Mo Guan Shan and his obliviousness.

“Wha-?”

“He Tian confessed to you over and over, yet you never say anything.” Jian Yi looked around, careful for their conversation to not be heard by the wrong people. “And you run away every time stuff gets…” He hesitated, choosing his words. “You know.”

“That fucker told you this?”

“Don’t get mad at him, Redhead.” Jian Yi tried to appease. “He wanted to vent and we have similar problems, so.” He chuckled at Mo Guan Shan’s confused expression. “We’re just scratching each other’s back; I don’t want anything with your boyfriend.”

“He’s not my-!” Mo Guan Shan was about to deny when he noticed that, well, he actually was He Tian’s boyfriend. “What’s your point, then?”

“Take better care of He Tian.” Jian Yi advised. “One of the things that pisses me off the most about Zhan Zheng Xi is that one day he tells me how much I’m important to him and he wants to protect me, but the next he’s just acting like a damn iceberg.” He commented sadly, his eyes looking at a random point at the window. “You two are similar, so just show He Tian that.”

“That what?”

“That you care? That you like him? I don’t know, man, that’s entirely up to you.”

Mo Guan Shan couldn’t deny he felt thankful for Jian Yi to have sacrificed his precious time with his best friend to come talk to the problematic Mo Guan Shan, of all people. He also would never let anyone know it, but after having that talk with Jian Yi, he felt just a tiny bit braver than usual, which resulted in him walking up to He Tian’s classroom as soon as the classes were over.

“Mom wants you to come have dinner with us.” He said from the door, his body leaning on it and his expression soft. He Tian was surrounded by six girls, but Mo Guan Shan didn’t really care.

“Auntie invitation?” He Tian asked, a beam of happiness in his voice. “I’ll be there.”

“I’m gonna send you the address, then.” Mo Guan Shan lied, and as He Tian was about to burst ‘ _I’ve been to your house many times already_ ’, Mo Guan Shan winked.

He Tian didn’t get why Mo Guan Shan would so bluntly do something that would make people assume things if they witnessed, but as soon as his phone buzzed and he read Mo Guan Shan’s message, everything made sense.

‘ _And I want you to spend the night_.’

If that meant what He Tian thought it did, there was only one way of figuring it out.

* * *

“I thought Guan Shan was keeping you all to himself.” Mo Guan Shan’s mother joked as soon as He Tian entered the apartment.

“What do you mean, auntie?” He Tian asked interested, while Mo Guan Shan just wanted a hole to hide in.

“After you two started going out he never brought you here again.” She chuckled and He Tian’s eyes widened. “Oh, Guan Shan didn’t tell you that I know?”

“He didn’t.” He Tian said, his eyes slitted and glinting with mischief. “I wonder for how long he’s been keeping that from me.”

“Since the beginning.” To their surprise, who answered the unasked question was Mo Guan Shan. “I just didn’t want the two of you teasing me.”

“Well,” Mo Guan Shan’s mother interrupted, “thank you for taking care of Guan Shan, student He.”

“It’s been a pleasure, auntie.”

The rest of the evening went by fairly well. It was obvious that He Tian and Mo Guan Shan’s mother would team up to make Mo Guan Shan’s life a little hell, but in the end he had more fun that he thought he would.

After they were full, dishes were washed and showers were taken, Mo Guan Shan saw himself between a rock and a hard place. His mother was long gone, claiming she was tired and needed some rest, and that left him and He Tian in his bedroom. Alone. Mo Guan Shan didn’t have anywhere to run.

“I guess,” Mo Guan Shan stuttered, “before anything, we should talk.”

“Talk?” He Tian raised an eyebrow, interested. “About what?”

“Me. Us. Mostly me, though.”

“What about you?”

“I’m sorry.” Mo Guan Shan said the words so fast He Tian almost didn’t catch it. “I made you feel bad.”

“Did you?”

“Well, yes.” Mo Guan Shan sat on his bed and crossed his legs. “Jian Yi talked to me today.”

“Ah.” He Tian’s brows moved understanding, now everything made sense. “Of course he did.”

“Don’t blame him.” Mo Guan Shan caught himself defending Jian Yi. “If he hadn’t talked to me, I’d never know and things would get ugly.”

“What did he say?”

“Things I needed to hear.” Mo Guan Shan confessed. “Like how I’m a coward that was making you suffer because of my own insecurities.”

“…”

“But you are also guilty.” Mo Guan Shan pointed his index finger at He Tian, angry. “Because you could’ve talked to me and I’d have told you what was going on, but you never did.”

“I guess we’re both guilty on that matter, Little Mo.” He Tian shrugged and Mo Guan Shan nodded. “I didn’t say anything because I was confused.”

“About what?”

“I mean,” He Tian hesitated, trying to think of a soft way of telling Mo Guan Shan things he wouldn’t take so well, “after everything that happened with us, I just thought you wanted me too.”

“I’d be lying if I said I don’t.” Mo Guan Shan sighed. “I mean,” and before he could control his tongue, he said it, “I had dreams.”

Mo Guan Shan covered his mouth and He Tian widened his eyes. And just like an unstoppable river, memories flooded He Tian’s mind as he remembered flashes of countless things that happened in the previous month, but more specifically, on the day Mo Guan Shan had to go to the nurse’s office.

“Forget I said anything.”

“I am not forgetting.” He Tian smiled and kneeled on the floor, looking at Mo Guan Shan dead in the eye. “So that was what was happening at the nurse’s office.” His grin grew mischievous once Mo Guan Shan’s widened.

“You said I didn’t do anything.” Mo Guan Shan whined.

“I lied.” He Tian confessed, grabbing Mo Guan Shan’s hands and bringing him closer. “You made me jerk off in our school’s bathroom that day, Little Mo.” He added, Mo Guan Shan’s pet name rolling on his tongue.

“What did I do?” Mo Guan Shan asked, almost regretting when he saw the way He Tian’s eyes shone.

“Why don’t we trade information?” He Tian offered. “You tell me about those dreams and I tell you what you did.”

“One dream.” Mo Guan Shan argued, but still feeling excited with the prospect of sharing his dream with He Tian.

“Fine.” He Tian complied. “Which one?”

“Nurse’s office.” Mo Guan Shan whispered.

“You’re gonna tell me what you were dreaming there?” He Tian asked.

“No.” Mo Guan Shan shook his head and smirked. “I’m gonna _show_ you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to finish there. If I kept going the chapter would be like, 30k words long and I wouldn't like it, as the author. So I decided to chop the last chapter in 2 and make it 6 instead of 5.
> 
> Also, the last chapter will only be posted after that one thing I have planned happens, so it doesn't really depend entirely on me.
> 
> Please, be patient with this dorky author haha.
> 
> I hope you all liked it, comments are always welcome <3
> 
> Popsy's out~


	6. Trust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An ending between dreams, pictures, fans and first times.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M ALIVE, I'M ALIVE OH YEAH!
> 
> So, if you follow me on tumblr, you are probably aware that two months ago Stay entered hiatus. I went through a lot during the last semester and between personal and work-related problems, I lost my will of writing.
> 
> But alas, that downer mood of mine passed and I came back full force.
> 
> Beware for the over 19 thousand words of smut, a little bit of plot, more smut, more plot, and even more smut~

Mo Guan Shan smiled when He Tian looked at him surprised, but still curious. He tapped He Tian’s shoulder, telling him to get out of the way, and stood up, being followed closely by He Tian.

“What are you doing?” He Tian asked when he saw Mo Guan Shan reaching for the light switch.

“Just let me do this.” Mo Guan Shan answered as he turned the lights off, leaving both of them in the dim room lit only by the street light pole and the moon.

“I wanna see you.” He Tian said lowly, and Mo Guan Shan realized he was much closer than before, as he could feel his warmth.

“You wouldn’t anyway.” Mo Guan Shan chuckled and leaned back, feeling He Tian’s body press against his. “I want you to keep quiet, ok?”

“Why?”

“Because you never talk in my dreams.”

That was enough to make He Tian shut up. He just stayed there, his chest pressed against Mo Guan Shan’s back, waiting for him to take the lead and show, as he had said he would. He Tian didn’t need to wait long and Mo Guan Shan grabbed his hands. Mo Guan Shan put He Tian’s hands on his hips and leaned his head back while he moved the hands upwards, raising his shirt.

“I didn’t have it on.” He whispered. “None of us.”

He Tian backed off a little, helping Mo Guan Shan to take off his shirt, taking his own off right afterwards. When both of them were shirtless, Mo Guan Shan took a step backwards, and almost immediately He Tian’s hands were nested on his hips. But Mo Guan Shan didn’t stop there, he moved even closer to He Tian, grinding his hips backwards, towards He Tian’s crotch.

Mo Guan Shan felt He Tian lean his head forwards, his breath warm against Mo Guan Shan’s nape. Only then Mo Guan Shan finally had the guts to do what he really should, if he was going to show He Tian what he had dreamt, so he put his hands on top of He Tian’s and started moving them.

First he moved them a little bit upwards, making He Tian caress his waist lightly. Then he moved them to the front of his body. He Tian’s fingers traveled through his abs, circling his navel, and at some point Mo Guan Shan realized he didn’t need to guide He Tian anymore, as he had already gotten the hang of what he had to do.

However, after a few minutes feeling He Tian’s hands tickling his body on the softest of ways, Mo Guan Shan started to feel frustrated. Even though the touches were pleasant and welcome, they were also not enough, and it didn’t matter how much Mo Guan Shan was enjoying the fact that He Tian took the lead, he still wasn’t doing what he was supposed to do.

And that was exactly what made Mo Guan Shan grab He Tian’s hands once more, guiding them all the way upwards and towards both of his nipples. It felt much better than when he had played with his nipples himself, and Mo Guan Shan was too involved in the situation to control the low moan that left his lips.

He tried to ignore He Tian’s surprised gasp upon his moan and just focused on the feelings. Mo Guan Shan closed his eyes and felt as He Tian took the lead again, rubbing the small buds and pinching them eventually, grinning whenever he could make Mo Guan Shan let out an embarrassing sound.

But to He Tian’s demise, Mo Guan Shan didn’t want to be the only one to be embarrassed, which made him grind his hips even harder against He Tian’s – now fully hard – dick. He Tian sighed and placed his lips on the curve of Mo Guan Shan’s neck, leaving butterfly kisses all over that area.

“I didn’t even need to tell you.” Mo Guan Shan said between pants. “Keep doing it.”

He Tian only complied, as that was an order he was happy to follow. He kept kissing Mo Guan Shan’s nape, eventually going down his shoulder and then coming back up, while his fingertips maintained the torturing pleasure on Mo Guan Shan’s nipples. Mo Guan Shan kept grinding his hips backwards, controlling his voice to not be loud, but still letting out a moan every now and again.

If He Tian got turned on with Mo Guan Shan only grinding against him when they were in the nurse’s office, there weren’t words to describe how he felt now that he was the one bringing each of those reactions from Mo Guan Shan. He had already imagined an aroused Mo Guan Shan plenty of times, but none of them were compared to the real deal.

“What else?” He Tian caught himself asking.

Mo Guan Shan was perfectly aware that even with the lights off and his back turned to He Tian, he wouldn’t have the guts to say the words out loud, so he settled with the actions. He grabbed He Tian’s right hand with his own and moved it down, stopping right when they reached the waistband of his sweatpants. He placed He Tian’s fingers under the cloth barrier and took his hand away; knowing that He Tian was smart enough to know what he had to do.

He Tian then moved his hand a little bit further low, feeling his knuckles being trapped by both Mo Guan Shan’s sweatpants and underwear. He could already feel the thick hair on his fingertips when Mo Guan Shan stiffened his body, breath hitching. He Tian resumed kissing his shoulder and pinched his left nipple, trying to soothe Mo Guan Shan, trying to show him everything was ok.

“Don’t stop.” Mo Guan Shan whispered at some point. Of course part of him was dying of embarrassment, but the other was bursting with desire and all he wanted was for He Tian to get it on with. “I trust you.”

Those words were definitely not what He Tian was waiting to hear from Mo Guan Shan, but they did their job well in giving him a boost in his confidence. And with his courage refilled, his hand moved way lower, brushing against Mo Guan Shan’s erection. He then circled his fingers around the base and heard Mo Guan Shan stifle a whimper as his hand pumped up and down.

“At some point,” Mo Guan Shan panted, “you stopped kissing my neck.” He tried to say his words normally, but he was feeling too good to be able to think properly. “You started sucking.”

“Did I?” He Tian asked rhetorically, a mischievous thought invading his mind and leaving through his mouth. “Where?”

“Idiot.” Mo Guan Shan mumbled in response, panting harder when he felt He Tian’s hand moving faster on his dick. “My neck.”

He Tian chuckled, amazed on how Mo Guan Shan was crumbling under his ministrations, his usual angry self reduced to nothing but a panting mess. That, of course, was also making things hard for He Tian, as every time Mo Guan Shan bucked his hips backwards, rolling them over He Tian’s dick, he felt as if he couldn’t take it anymore.

Little did He Tian know, but Mo Guan Shan was also reaching his limit. He was close, but still feeling like the way He Tian was jerking his dick off wasn’t as near as enough to tip him over the edge. And with that feeling overwhelming his clouded thoughts, Mo Guan Shan grabbed He Tian’s hands, making him stop moving.

Even though He Tian’s hands had to stop, his tongue and lips didn’t. He kept pressing open-mouthed kisses that would grow into nibbling every now and again while Mo Guan Shan guided his hands. He Tian only stopped assaulting Mo Guan Shan’s neck, nape and shoulders when he felt Mo Guan Shan’s hands shaking over his, and his own right above the waistband of Mo Guan Shan’s pants.

He chuckled when, after a little while; Mo Guan Shan finally moved his hands downwards, sliding his clothing with it. He Tian had to hold his breath, letting Mo Guan Shan take total control of the situation; otherwise he would probably just put on his clothes again and run away, even though he was at home.

Soon, Mo Guan Shan’s sweatpants and boxers were pooling around his ankles, his body now exposed, but still hidden from He Tian’s sight. Mo Guan Shan then felt He Tian move again, leading his hands back to where they were and restarting the movements they had stopped not a long while ago. It was impossible to now let out a long and content sigh when He Tian grabbed his dick once more and started moving his pre-cum slick fingers up and down.

Still, at the same time it was more than enough to make Mo Guan Shan come, he was feeling extremely altruistic, and he didn’t want to be the only one to climax.

“It finished a while ago.” He said, low and breathless.“The dream.”

“I guess I should tell you my part of the deal.” He Tian whispered, his tongue tracing the curve of Mo Guan Shan’s neck all the way up to his ear. “You were sleeping, but your body was moving on its own.”

“What did I do?”

“The same you were doing before.” He Tian answered, his clothed hips bucking forwards and meeting Mo Guan Shan’s naked butt-cheeks. “This.”

“Did I-?” Mo Guan Shan asked, not brave enough to finish the sentence.

“Yes.” He Tian then moved his hand away from Mo Guan Shan’s cock and placed it on his waist, making him take a step forward as He Tian’s mouth left feathery kisses. “And if I hadn’t left you alone.” He inhaled Mo Guan Shan’s scent deeply. “I’d have come right there, inside my pants.”

“Wou-” But He Tian didn’t let Mo Guan Shan finish.

“Just like now.” He added. “I’m so fucking close.”

And before Mo Guan Shan could control his body or his words, he turned around.

“There’s another one.”

“Of course there is.” Even in the dark, Mo Guan Shan could see He Tian smiling. “How many there were?”

“I lost count.” Mo Guan Shan sort of confessed. He then took a step forward and closed their distance. He wanted to kiss He Tian, but he also wanted to tell He Tian about the one dream that finally made him lose his mind once and for all.

“I bet you did.” He Tian leaned in and brushed his lips against Mo Guan Shan’s, making every single movement be decisive in whether their lips would or wouldn’t touch. “What about this other one?” He asked at last.

“You…” Mo Guan Shan averted his eyes, his peak of courage suddenly disappearing through his fingers as his hesitation wanted to take over again.

“What did I do?” He Tian asked soft, noticing Mo Guan Shan was slowly becoming defensive. “Tell me, Little Mo.”

“It’s embarrassing.” Mo Guan Shan retorted. “I can’t sa-ay-” But before he could go on, he got interrupted by He Tian’s hand, which found its way back to Mo Guan Shan’s dick. “Fuck.”

“You know that I don’t read minds.” He Tian chuckled and kept moving his hand on a tortuous slow motion.

“You were you.” Mo Guan Shan muttered, defeated. “You just did what you wanted.”

“And what did I want?” He Tian pressed Mo Guan Shan against an invisible wall as his thumb circled the head. “What did the He Tian you imagined want?”

“Me.” The word left Mo Guan Shan’s lips as a breath.

“Be clearer.”

“The…” Mo Guan Shan hesitated, but he finally added after he swallowed the lump on his throat, feeling He Tian’s lips so close to his, and yet so far. “Bed.”

He Tian smirked and took a few steps backwards. When he noticed they were one step from bumping onto the bed, he took advantage of his control over Mo Guan Shan’s body and turned their bodies around, making Mo Guan Shan being the one with his back facing he bed. Mo Guan Shan than raised his arms, holding his wrists in front of He Tian’s eyes.

“Do you want me to hold them?” To what Mo Guan Shan nodded. “Hard?” A second nod.“Where?” Mo Guan Shan only looked up.

After trapping both of Mo Guan Shan’s wrists on a tight hold, He Tian raised his right hand, which made Mo Guan Shan’s arms rise in consequence. He Tian then took a moment to absorb this entire situation and to engrave this image so deep inside his mind that he would never be able to forget it.

Having Mo Guan Shan that submissive was something He Tian thought it was impossible to happen. He would never imagine Mo Guan Shan would let He Tian hold his hands over his head while he practically devoured his body with his eyes, memorizing every little patch of skin he could in that dim lit room. He would never imagine Mo Guan Shan would just stay still, completely naked and hard, just waiting for He Tian’s next movement.

And how did Mo Guan Shan look enticing like that. Eyes half-closed, breath heavy and chest going up and down forcefully. He Tian wasn’t sure if Mo Guan Shan was flushed, but he had the little guess that he was.

But even though He Tian wanted to drown himself in that body, showering Mo Guan Shan in kisses from his head up until his toes, taking his sweet time at Mo Guan Shan’s lower stomach and maybe even licking at his length, He Tian was still curious about the other dream Mo Guan Shan mentioned at some point.

“What now?”

“The bed.” Mo Guan Shan repeated, praying for He Tian to understand his intentions.

He Tian thought about giving any rationality to his actions, yet he knew they were both way past rationality point, so he just brushed it away and followed his instincts. And his instincts told him to tackle Mo Guan Shan to the bed and then ravish his mouth in a wet and hot open-mouthed kiss, so that was exactly what He Tian did.

After throwing Mo Guan Shan on his bed, He Tian took a second to admire how good Mo Guan Shan looked under him, and right after that he lowered his head, meeting his mouth with Mo Guan Shan’s. As Mo Guan Shan was not only waiting for it, but also eager, He Tian was promptly received with a tongue rolling against his.

Mo Guan Shan seemed like he had his mind clouded and couldn’t think properly, his half-lidded eyes only begging for He Tian to keep doing whatever he was doing. It was like Mo Guan Shan decided to let his dream self take control and show everything he had hid from He Tian in this past month. It was like Mo Guan Shan decided to show He Tian how much he also wanted it.

“It was after this dream,” Mo Guan Shan panted, he was having a hard time normalizing his pulse, but he didn’t care, “That I jerked off while thinking of you for the first time.”

“Fuck, Little Mo.” He Tian hissed, trying to ignore as his own dick twitched after hearing that confession. “Do you really wanna make me come inside my pants?” He Tian chuckled and shook his head.

“It would be a mess.” Mo Guan Shan said, half of his words meaning it, but the other half hiding the fact that he actually just wanted to see He Tian naked. “You should take them off.”

He Tian smirked and leaned in, kissing Mo Guan Shan’s lips in an insatiable hunger once more. After he retreated he decided to do what Mo Guan Shan had told him to and let go of his arms. To He Tian’s surprise, Mo Guan Shan didn’t move an inch when he was finally set free, he just observed He Tian while he stood up and got rid of his own sweatpants and boxers. He Tian just wanted to say fuck it and make Mo Guan Shan his the moment he noticed those copper eyes staring at him and that tempting tongue licking his lips.

He decided not to let his mind read too much into that, as they were still reenacting Mo Guan Shan’s dreams, and chose to focus instead. So, as soon as his clothes were lost among Mo Guan Shan’s, He Tian climbed back on the bed and grabbed Mo Guan Shan by the wrists, pressuring them together once more. He Tian wanted to kiss Mo Guan Shan again and again, until the end of the times, but he controlled himself and asked instead.

“What now?”

“We weren’t naked.” Mo Guan Shan said.“In the dream.”

“Do you wanna put your clothes on again?” He Tian offered, trying to mask his annoyed tone but doing a bad job at it.

“No.” Mo Guan Shan shook his head and an enticing smile molded his lips. “It’s easier to clean like this.” _And better_ , his mind added.

“So what should I do?” He Tian asked, his head hovering against Mo Guan Shan’s and their lips brushing again.

“Touch me.” Mo Guan Shan whispered and leaned forwards. “And kiss me.” He added right before taking He Tian’s lips on his.

That sweet order Mo Guan Shan mumbled right before invading He Tian’s mouth with his tongue was just what He Tian needed, taking no time to move his left hand all over Mo Guan Shan’s body. He Tian was finding a new hidden liking to make Mo Guan Shan squirm every single time he pinched a nipple, or to make Mo Guan Shan let out a breathless moan between his lips every single time his hand got closer to Mo Guan Shan’s crotch.

When He Tian finally palmed his dick, Mo Guan Shan decided to do just like he had done in the dream – and to hell it was so good he still remembered it clearly, even after a whole month – and bucked his hips upwards, meeting with not only He Tian’s hand, but his equally naked crotch as well. And the breath He Tian let out at the same time he nibbled Mo Guan Shan’s lower lip in order to restrain a moan was almost enough to make Mo Guan Shan come on the spot.

He couldn’t let his body’s desire to climax win, however. Mo Guan Shan still wanted to see He Tian as wrecked as Mo Guan Shan was pretty damn sure he already was. He still wanted to see He Tian drowning in pleasure, and all because of him. That desire made Mo Guan Shan keep bucking his hips to meet with He Tian’s, until He Tian finally got the memo and pressed his own hips downwards, meeting with Mo Guan Shan’s thrusts.

He Tian was hot. But not only hot in the sexy sense of the word, he was also scorching hot. Boiling hot. So hot Mo Guan Shan felt he could start melting at any moment. Having He Tian’s dick, hard and twitching and leaking with pre-cum, against his own made everything surreal, and Mo Guan Shan couldn’t even believe he had finally let his hesitation aside and let He Tian do whatever he wanted with him.

He should have let He Tian do that earlier. He was missing too much.

That wasn’t important, though. What was important was how He Tian had finally grabbed their cocks together, changing his hands on the process, and started masturbating them at the same time. As his long fingers slid over and between their erections, both of them feeling their wet tips touching every now and then, Mo Guan Shan’s tongue curled inside his mouth, taking them closer and closer to their climax.

And when it finally came, it was as strong as an avalanche.

Mo Guan Shan pressed his face harder against He Tian’s, making him swallow his embarrassing moans as his body jerked and his dick twitched, white cum spurting all over his torso. The scene He Tian made sure to watch, opening his eyes as he felt the body under his shiver, was nearly enough to tip him over the edge. Seeing Mo Guan Shan’s brows furrow even further and his desperation into making He Tian muffle his growls was too much, and just as Mo Guan Shan was enjoying his afterglow, He Tian had to just pump his dick a few more times until he was also coming.

For a moment Mo Guan Shan didn’t care how that hot cum dirtying his stomach and chest wasn’t his, or how He Tian shouldn’t look so beautiful in such a messed up state, or even that they were way too close to his mother’s room and he could’ve been louder than he imagined. All he cared was how their kiss was slow and calm, and how his heart was slowly lowering its pulse, and even how He Tian’s body – that was now lying next to his – seemed oddly comfortable.

“I wish I had your imagination.” He Tian said in a chuckle, a few moments after leaving the afterglow high.

“Oh, don’t.” Mo Guan Shan mimicked his laugh and shook his head. “I never got to come in the dreams and it was really frustrating waking up with a morning wood basically every single day.”

“Better than having to wash your underwear so you mom wouldn’t see it.”

“Point taken.” Mo Guan Shan snorted, which surprised the other, and turned to face He Tian. “It must be nice to live alone in those cases.”

“Well, yeah.” He Tian agreed. “But it also must be nice to live with your family.” He Tian commented grim and Mo Guan Shan almost regretted opening his mouth.

He then remembered the first time he wanted to apologize to He Tian, and he told him not to. So Mo Guan Shan decided to change the subject.

“There’s another thing.” He mumbled and hid his face on He Tian’s chest. He was probably embarrassed. “One thing that now I realize that I should have said before, but I didn’t.”

“What is it?” He Tian asked, lowering his gaze to meet with the top of Mo Guan Shan’s head.

“You know you are a dick most of the time.” Mo Guan Shan spat, rude as usual. “And you’re always trying to take advantage of me.” He took a deep breath and kept going. “But even though you try to hide your feelings behind those fake smiles, you’re honest with me most of the time.”

“What do you mean, Little Mo?” He Tian cocked an eyebrow, looking interested at Mo Guan Shan, who just writhed while thinking of the best words to say. His ears were also red and hot against his skin.

“I like you.” Mo Guan Shan confessed. “You are a jerk, but I like you.”

And just like it was nothing, all He Tian’s insecurities flown away.

“I like you too, Little Mo.” He Tian mumbled on Mo Guan Shan’s right ear and hugged him tight.

Too tight.

“Let me go, I’m all disgusting.” That was enough to make He Tian loosen the hug, but not enough for him to let go completely.

“I could lick you clean.” He Tian offered and Mo Guan Shan’s dick twitched with the idea, yet Mo Guan Shan was tired and wanted to sleep.

“It does sound tempting,” He said, “But we’re gonna enter a vicious cycle and I really wanna sleep.” Mo Guan Shan decided to just ignore the voice in the back of his head saying that it was also gross.

“Fair.”

He Tian then finally let go of Mo Guan Shan, who stood up and went directly to his desk, searching for a tissue box. When he found it, he grabbed a few tissues and then threw the box to He Tian, who also needed to clean his chest after hugging Mo Guan Shan. It was only when Mo Guan Shan was almost done that he noticed He Tian’s gaze on him, piercing his skin.

“What?”

“You look beautiful like this.” He Tian didn’t even need to finish the sentence for Mo Guan Shan to understand the real meaning behind it. And it caused Mo Guan Shan to not only flush from head to toe, but also throw whatever he was holding right at He Tian’s face. It was a tissue. “Oh fuck it’s wet.” He Tian said grabbing the crumpled tissue and analyzing it. “Yep, that’s a tissue full of jizz.”

“Fucking dick.” Mo Guan Shan mumbled, trying not to laugh at He Tian now grabbing tissues to wipe his face. He then finished cleaning himself and put on his underwear, throwing He Tian his own after it. “Here.”

“Ah, I thought we were sleeping naked.” He Tian complained on a teasing tone.

“Another word and you’ll sleep on the floor.”

It was, luckily, enough to make He Tian do the zipping motion with his fingers, signalizing he wouldn’t say anything else. Mo Guan Shan only lied down beside He Tian after getting all the tissues and throwing them in the garbage bin, but when he did, he was immediately hugged from behind, having He Tian inhale his scent on the crook of his neck.

“Goodnight.” He mumbled, knowing he wouldn’t get any answers because He Tian promised not to say anything else.

Mo Guan Shan was lulled to sleep by He Tian’s left hand caressing his arm and He Tian’s lips giving him butterfly kisses all over his shoulder, neck and nape.

* * *

Mo Guan Shan woke up to the sound of his annoying alarm clock ringing, happy that, for the first night in over one month, he hadn’t had a wet dream, nor waken up to a raging boner inside his pants. Sadly he couldn’t say the same to the one hugging him from behind, as the hard-on pressed against Mo Guan Shan’s butt-cheeks was stiff enough to give away what was actually happening.

“He Tian.” Mo Guan Shan nudged the unmoving body with his elbow, trying to wake He Tian up. “Wake up.”

“Hmmm.” He Tian mumbled, his chapped lips pressed against Mo Guan Shan’s back and his hips bucking forwards. “I’m up already.”

“We gotta get ready for school.” Mo Guan Shan said, yawning right afterwards, while he tried getting up. “Let go.”

“Help me.” He Tian seemed to have different ideas, however, as he grinded his hips against Mo Guan Shan’s ass a second time.

“My mom will knock on the door at any time.”

“Please.” He insisted, his left hand travelling through Mo Guan Shan’s body, all the way down to his crotch.

Mo Guan Shan tried to deny the touch at first, not really willing to go down that rabbit hole, especially not at seven in the morning. But He Tian was warm and his hands were big, and because of the previous night he knew exactly what he needed to do in order to push Mo Guan Shan’s buttons.

So before Mo Guan Shan’s mind could catch up with his body, he was already on top of He Tian, straddling his hips and grinding their crotches together. And when his mind finally caught up, Mo Guan Shan just blew the annoying thoughts away and gave in to He Tian’s big wandering hands and wet neck kisses.

“ _Fuck_.” He breathed when one of He Tian’s hands sneaked inside his boxers, melting little by little.

Or at least as much as he could before both of them heard soft knocks on Mo Guan Shan’s bedroom door.

“Guan Shan, He Tian, breakfast is almost ready!” It was Mo Guan Shan’s mother, announcing the information with her sweet voice.

“ _Fucking damn it!_ ” Mo Guan Shan cursed between his teeth, getting up from the bed and glaring at He Tian. “Thanks for the blue balls.”

He Tian didn’t retort, he only gave Mo Guan Shan one of his trademark cocky grins and got up as well, holding Mo Guan Shan by the waist and gluing their bodies together. The act made Mo Guan Shan’s scowl grow even deeper, but He Tian couldn’t care less, as he lowered his hands to Mo Guan Shan’s ass and used it to rut their pelvises against each other.

“We gotta go.” Mo Guan Shan whined halfheartedly, obviously not really willing to stop, but still unable to fight his own denying nature.

“Give me five minutes and I’ll take care of both of our blue balls.” He Tian offered in a whisper, nibbling at Mo Guan Shan’s earlobe lightly.

“Three.”

“I’ll try.”

* * *

Thirty minutes later, both Mo Guan Shan and He Tian left Mo Guan Shan’s house hand in hand, with He Tian trying to kiss Mo Guan Shan and the latter pushing He Tian away. That silly display of affection didn’t last long, though, as how Mo Guan Shan lived fairly close to the school, soon they were near the school’s gates. It also didn’t take long for He Tian to be swiped away by a small group of girls.

As Mo Guan Shan was already used to it, he just shrugged it off and kept walking towards the school’s main building. It was only when he was almost inside there, however, that he was stopped by a small hand on his shoulder. Mo Guan Shan turned around slowly, being greeted by a warm smile, whose owner was a tiny and delicate girl. And as if she was reading his mind, her smile grew larger and she spoke:

“Good morning, classmate Guan Shan.” Mo Guan Shan cocked an eyebrow, slightly puzzled.

“Do I know you?” He spat, unwilling to talk.

“I’m afraid not.” She said, her politeness starting to annoy him. “I was there,” the girl added, “when you were playing guitar and singing.”

“Of course you fucking were.” He rolled his eyes to the back of his head and turned around, leaving the girl to talk to herself and resuming his steps back to the main building.

“Wait, please.” She asked, her small hand back to Mo Guan Shan’s shoulder, but her warm smile gone.

“What the fuck do you want?”

“I was wondering if you wanted to eat something after school.” The girl looked down and Mo Guan Shan could clearly see the blush creeping on he ears.

“I don’t.” He answered nonchalant, but still waited to see if the girl would stop him a second time.

“B-but.” She stuttered. “You don’t have a girlfriend, do you?”

“I don’t see the connection.” He didn’t agree, he didn’t deny.

“Well…” her right hand twirled one of her longer dark strands while the other fumbled with the hem of her uniform shorts. “I’m not gonna lie, Guan Shan, I’m interested in you.”

That was new.

If Mo Guan Shan had heard it right, the girl was there when he sang, which meant, by consequence, that she was – probably – one of He Tian’s many fans. So it made absolutely no sense that the girl that supposedly liked He Tian was interested in Mo Guan Shan, of all people. Still, if she was telling the truth, it wasn’t like Mo Guan Shan could just play with someone’s feelings, so he spoke before his brain could catch up with his tongue.

“I’m not available.”

“As in you don’t have time this evening or as in you have a girlfriend?”

_Neither_.

“What are you two talking about?” If Mo Guan Shan didn’t know better the repercussion it would have, he would’ve kissed He Tian right then and there.

“Nothing important.” Mo Guan Shan said hasty, dragging He Tian by the wrist inside the school building. “Let’s go.”

“What’s wrong, Little Mo?” He Tian asked when they were climbing the stairs.

“She asked me on a date.”

“Oh?” He Tian smiled amused. “And what did you tell her?”

“That I was not available.”

“That’s vague.” He mocked.

“I don’t fucking care.”

“So if people found out about us, you’d be ok with it?”

Mo Guan Shan tried to hide the shiver running up his spine, he couldn’t.

“No.” He answered. “But not for the reasons you think.”

“Why, then?”

“If it was only because we’re both dudes, it’d be fine.” Mo Guan Shan said, crossing his arms in front of his chest. “I mean… Nobody says a word about Jian Yi and Zhan Zheng Xi.” He shrugged, rolling his eyes at He Tian’s surprised expression. “The only who doesn’t see this is Zheng Xi, he’s fucking damn dense.”

“You are one hundred percent correct.” He Tian agreed, smiling. “You still haven’t answered me, though.”

“The fans.” Mo Guan Shan mumbled. “I don’t know how the mob of fangirls you have would react if they knew we’re together.”

“Hnn.” He Tian hummed. “Makes sense.” He then opened a crazy grin. “I could come out to them, see their reactions.”

“Don’t.” Mo Guan Shan dismissed. “Who needs to know already does.”

Mo Guan Shan had a point, that He Tian had to agree with. Their friends and Mo Guan Shan’s mother knew about their relationship, and they were basically the only one who needed to know about it. However, He Tian did wish he could be affectionate with his red ball of fluff without being afraid of getting caught.

“Anyway,” He Tian said, getting Mo Guan Shan’s attention once more. “We’re having finals next week.”

“And you had to remind me of that.”

“Of course, Jian Yi was making a ruckus because he wants the four of us to go to the same high school, after all.”

“There’s no way in hell I can pass the test to the same school as you guys.” Mo Guan Shan stated matter-of-factly, entering his classroom and throwing his bag on a desk by the window.

“Not if you study by yourself.” He Tian grinned at Mo Guan Shan’s grumpy expression. “But I’m willing to help you, if you want.”

It was a tempting offer and Mo Guan Shan knew it, but he was still – somehow – unsure about it. On the one hand it would be nice to make his mom proud and go to a nice high school with his newfound friends – and boyfriend. On the other hand, though, Mo Guan Shan really wanted to start working so he could help his mom.

“Do share.” He Tian said, sitting on Mo Guan Shan’s desk after pushing his bag aside. “You got thoughtful all of a sudden.”

“What if I don’t wanna go to high school?”

“That would be a shame.” He Tian clicked his tongue in frustration. “But I’d support you regardless.” He shrugged. “It is your choice, after all.”

“But you’d also like to go to high school with me.”

“I’m biased.” He Tian smiled, he wanted to hug Mo Guan Shan at that moment and tell him everything would be alright, but he also needed to respect the boy’s personal space for the time being – or at least when there were another fifteen students in the classroom.

“Of course you are.” Mo Guan Shan huffed, and soon the bell rang. “I’m gonna think about it.” He said as He Tian exited the classroom.

* * *

Mo Guan Shan did think about it. Even though he was divided between helping his mother after graduating from middle school and giving his mother the joy of keep studying, but living with the fear of finding his home wrecked and his mother gone – the debts. It didn’t matter how hard he thought, however, his heart kept inclined to the quitting direction.

Mo Guan Shan was so lost in thought he only noticed it was lunchtime when he felt a hand on his nape.

“If you keep thinking this hard, you’re gonna hurt yourself.” He Tian teased, earning a glare from Mo Guan Shan.

“It isn’t an easy decision, ok?” Mo Guan Shan sighed, getting up from his chair and walking out of the classroom. He Tian followed him suit. “There’s a lot at stake.”

“Wanna share?”

“I don’t really want to, but…” He shook his head lightly, feeling He Tian’s thumb draw small circle patterns on the fuzzy hair on the back of his neck. “I feel like I have to.”

“You don’t.” He Tian assured. “If you don’t wanna, you don’t have to.”

“You don’t get it.” Mo Guan Shan didn’t want to get angry, but he also couldn’t control his huff. “My family is in debt.”

He Tian wanted to say a million things, but upon noticing Mo Guan Shan’s features contorted on a grim expression, he knew he shouldn’t. So He Tian just settled with following Mo Guan Shan around and giving him the space he needed. They ended up sitting on the wooden bench by the court. The same bench they were by when He Tian kissed Mo Guan Shan for the very first time.

“Hah.” Mo Guan Shan chuckled. “Here was the place I swore I would never let you near me again.”

“Look where it got you.” He Tian mused.

“It’s not like I could ignore what you did to me, first. And then for me, later.”

“You swore you’d never let me near you again,” He Tian echoed, “and I swore I would do whatever I could to get you to trust me.” He laughed and hooked his arm around Mo Guan Shan’s neck. “I fucked up really back that day.”

“You did.” Mo Guan Shan agreed, growing thoughtful for the second time.

It was only ten long silent minutes later that Mo Guan Shan talked again.

“I don’t know exactly what the debt is about, but I do know there are loansharks involved.”

“…” He Tian couldn’t help but to retrieve his arm and look at Mo Guan Shan in shock. “So that’s why you need money so bad.”

“For a smartass, took you long enough to figure it out.”

“You wanted to be expelled because of that.” A light nod. “You wanted to start working as soon as possible.” A second light nod. “It all makes sense now.”

“And I know that if I talk to my mom about it, she’s gonna tell me everything is fine.” A deep sigh. “That I don’t need to worry.” Wavering voice. “But I’ve seen them threatening her, calling her names.” Tears.

“ _Shit_.” He Tian whispered, keeping inside all the lines he could say about helping, yet knowing Mo Guan Shan was way too proud to accept his help.

“I’m not gonna lie, it does sound nice trying to keep studying and all of that.” Even though Mo Guan Shan was snorting a little laugh, He Tian could see he was still hurting. “You guys were the closest to friends that I’ve ever had.”

“But?”

“They don’t know where we live, but for how long, though?”

He Tian could understand, of course he could. Mo Guan Shan was – even though he would deny it – a momma’s boy, and he surely wouldn’t forgive himself if his mom got hurt on his watch. Mo Guan Shan’s dad was in jail – He Tian had found out that much from rumors – so in theory Mo Guan Shan was the only one there for her. That made He Tian even more willing to help, but also even more unable to act, as he didn’t want to hurt Mo Guan Shan’s pride.

Rock meets hard place.

Or at least was what He Tian was thinking, until he noticed Mo Guan Shan’s expression had suddenly grown surprised, as if he had just realized something.

He had.

“Wait.”

Mo Guan Shan’s hand stood in the air, palm and straight fingers on the universal wait sign. He then turned a little bit towards He Tian, not minding the drying tears on his cheeks or the fact that his eyes were slightly reddened. The last thing Mo Guan Shan did was point to He Tian, eyes shining and the sides of his mouth shying an almost smile.

“Is that job offer still standing?” Mo Guan Shan asked, insight written all over his face. “I know it was months ago, but do they still want me?”

He Tian took exactly ten seconds to fish in his memories for what Mo Guan Shan was talking about. He too got an insightful expression when that happened.

“I’ll check and tell you after class.” He answered.

“That might change everything, He Tian. Everything.”

He Tian checked.

“Surprisingly,” He Tian said, meeting up with Mo Guan Shan as soon as the last bell rang, “they still want you.”

“Tell them I’m in, then.”

“I thought you didn’t like to be put on display.”

“You were listening back then.” Mo Guan Shan chuckled. “And I was listening to you when you mentioned the pay would be twice as much.”

“If not more.” He Tian added, suddenly getting where Mo Guan Shan was going. “You are the smartass.”

“I mean,” He Tian noticed Mo Guan Shan was stuttering with his words, so he gave the boy space to think, “even though I don’t like the fact that my face will probably be in a magazine, it sounds better than working as a waiter or some shit job I’d have to get if I didn’t finish school.”

“I’m gonna tell them, then.” He smiled at Mo Guan Shan. “But you do know you’re a minor, right? We’re gonna need your mom on board too, probably.”

“I can convince her.” Mo Guan Shan then gave He Tian one of his rare genuine smiles. “You’re gonna have to deal with a take-out today.” And before He Tian could ask why Mo Guan Shan was saying this, he had already taken off sprinting.

Damn the boy was fast when he wanted to.

* * *

Mo Guan Shan shouldn’t have sprinted all the way to his home.

He opened the door panting like a dog, his heart beating harshly against his ribcage, and the air burning his nose and lungs, reminding him of why he didn’t do that on a daily basis. His mom looked at him shocked, not sure on how to deal with her son’s condition at that right moment.

“’M fine.” He huffed. “Just,” huff, “ran,” huff, “all uh the way.” Two more huffs.

“Do you want some water?” The woman asked, and Mo Guan Shan nodded his head tiredly, the adrenaline finally fading and his body asking him to sit down.

“How hard do you want me to keep studying?” He asked, not looking at his mom, after downing three glasses of water and sitting on the couch.

“You want to keep studying?” Mo Guan Shan didn’t know if his mom was weirded or just stunned, and he really didn’t want to think about it, so he just settled with answering her question.

“I think so.” He said. “High school, who knows, maybe even college?” As he talked, the couch shifted beside him as his mother sat by his side.

“You’d make me the proudest mom on earth, Guan Shan.” Her sweet voice warmed Mo Guan Shan, who wanted to just hug the woman and say thank you. He couldn’t, however, he had to focus.

“But we are in debt.” He dragged both of them back to reality, annoyed that his mother’s beautiful smile had faded, giving place to a frown.

“Yes.” She agreed, quietly.

“So I want you to let me work while I go to school.”

“What?” Mo Guan Shan could tell this was definitely not what his mom was expecting him to say, but he could also see her reaction wasn’t necessarily bad. “Why would you ask my permission to work?” She commented in confusion. “You’re fifteen already, many people take people your age just fine.”

“My face will be all over the place, mom.”

“I’m not following, Guan Shan.”

“HeTian has a friend that is a photographer, a few months ago he told me his friend wanted me to model.” Mo Guan Shan bit his lower lip, trying to read his mother’s poker face. “The offer still stands.”

“A model?”

“Remember the paycheck I brought home that day I stayed out with He Tian the whole day, months back?” She nodded. “Twice as much, He Tian thinks it could even be more.”

“But isn’t it a one-time thing?”

“Yes, probably.” Mo Guan Shan agreed, but the way he smiled his mom knew he had a counter argument ready. “But I’m a natural redhead, mom. How common is that in China?”

“It isn’t, not at all.” She answered, oblivious. Until it kicked. “You could get other offers.”

“I will get other offers.” He smiled victorious. “So, would you allow me to work?”

“If that means my boy is going to keep studying, I’m all on board.” She smiled fondly and Mo Guan Shan leaned in, locking her in a bear hug.

“Thanks mom. And He Tian will be coming here so we can study together, finals are right around the corner.”

* * *

The following days were the fullest Mo Guan Shan had ever had. He was actually paying attention to classes and taking notes – which caused a small commotion in his classroom on the first two days, nobody was used to a diligent Mo Guan Shan after all. During the afternoons and the first hours of the evenings, He Tian and Mo Guan Shan would study together, and both of them were fairly surprised with the fact that none of them wanted to kill each other.

Of course, teaching Mo Guan Shan wasn’t an easy task. He had a thick skull and some subjects he just couldn’t understand after hours of He Tian repeating the same things, but with different words. Still, Mo Guan Shan tried to keep in his head that it wasn’t He Tian’s fault that he wasn’t understanding what he was saying, and He Tian also repeated that to himself, trying not to blame Mo Guan Shan for his trouble with learning – he hadn’t taken school seriously up until that point, and it was kind of too late.

Slowly, however (but not too slowly because the finals were on Friday and Saturday of the following week), Mo Guan Shan was learning at least the minimum he needed to get an above average score, and probably pass the entrance exam for the high school the other three boys had chosen – or that Zhan Zheng Xi had chosen and Jian Yi dragged everybody with them.

On Saturday, during the late afternoon, both the boys took a break on their study sessions so He Tian could take Mo Guan Shan back to the photography studio they visited a few months prior, but now with different intentions.

Mo Guan Shan felt nervous as they entered the elevator, drying his sweaty palms on his trousers and hoping for He Tian not to notice his high levels of anxiety. Taking pictures of himself wasn’t something Mo Guan Shan did on his own, and he surely wasn’t ok with other people doing it for him. Yet there was him, willingly letting someone dress him up, put him in – probably – embarrassing poses and taking countless pictures of him.

He definitely wasn’t excited about it.

But he needed the money, that was a clear way of starting to make a name for himself, and it would give him the possibility of being selfish for once in his life. So Mo Guan Shan just ignored how giddy He Tian looked once he had changed to one of the photo shoot outfits, and focused on pretending there was only him and the photographer there, since it would make things just a little better.

Although he could feel He Tian’s eyes piercing his skin, but that was another story.

“Keep it in your pants.” He Tian heard a high-pitched voice coming from his side, it was the assistant.

“Excuse me?”

“The way you look at him, dude, eating the poor boy alive.” She chuckled amused. “It’s gonna make him uncomfortable if you stare too much.”

“Can’t help it.” He Tian shrugged. “Unless you got something for me to do while they aren’t done there.”

“Well, when he told me that your friend had changed his mind,” she said, pointing at the photographer with her head, “I did have some ideas.”

“What does that have to do with me doing something while I wait?”

“Everything!” She mused. “Especially since you won’t have to wait.”

“You’re gonna make me a model too?”

“You know you’re a pretty boy, He Tian. And Yu’s wanted to shoot you since you guys met.”

“I don’t think Guan Shan is gonna be ok with it, though.” He Tian retorted, brow raised. His expression turned confused, however, when the woman smiled even brighter.

“We’ve talked to him already, he was ok with it.”

He Tian was left speechless for a few seconds, and as soon as he recovered his mental capabilities, the woman started to drag him through the studio, pushing clothes on his hands and telling him to change and join Mo Guan Shan once he was dressed.

They had a punk-rock-kinda-biker theme going on, He Tian noticed while analyzing the clothing he was given, and although he felt like it didn’t fit his style much, he knew those clothes were perfect for Mo Guan Shan. So he just put on them and joined his boyfriend in front of the camera, trying not to laugh when Mo Guan Shan looked at him with a stunned expression.

“They told me you were ok with it.” He shrugged.

Mo Guan Shan didn’t answer.

Yu, the photographer, told them their photos would be published on a magazine issue that was going to be released on the following week, and Mo Guan Shan wasn’t looking forward to it at all, especially when it was mentioned that the probable date was Friday. Because of course his face was going to be all over a magazine on the very same day he had countless tests one after the other.

* * *

This sidetrack activity didn’t stop He Tian and Mo Guan Shan’s study sessions, though. Even on Saturday evening and the whole Sunday they studied, as He Tian wanted to be one hundred percent sure Mo Guan Shan would be able to join them in high school. But because he was so focused on helping, He Tian ended up neglecting the affective side of their relationship – which was weird to unbelievable extents.

So when Thursday was almost over, and Mo Guan Shan was already lying on his bed, trying to get some sleep done because he had tests on the following day, he felt like exploding. Not exploding in the anger sense of the word, because even though Mo Guan Shan had a sort of explosive character, this side of him had been controlled over the past weeks.

What was actually happening to Mo Guan Shan was something he never thought he would have problems with – he was dating He Tian, right? Mo Guan Shan was horny. As horny as he would get when the dreams first began to haunt his nights. And without He Tian touching him all over, which he would usually do on a daily basis, Mo Guan Shan saw himself not only missing it, but yearning for it to happen.

But they had to study. And take pictures. And study some more.

So, on that lonely Thursday evening, Mo Guan Shan was on the edge.

And that was the only reason why he sent _that_ to He Tian.

* * *

He Tian had just left the shower when his phone buzzed on the couch. He had left Mo Guan Shan’s house about an hour before, and he wondered if it was his Little Mo asking him if he was at home – or saying goodnight.

That wasn’t the case.

Not in a million years He Tian would think he would receive a message like this, not from Mo Guan Shan at least, so the only thing he could do was close the message app and open it again, thinking his mind was playing tricks on him and once he opened it again, it would have vanished.

It didn’t.

And then He Tian could only lick his lips and open the picture full screen, burning every single detail of it inside his brain, as he wasn’t sure if Mo Guan Shan would be sneaky and delete that picture later.

After five minutes staring at the picture, He Tian felt his phone buzzing again, and the app notification coming down his screen, showing He Tian that Mo Guan Shan was telling him it was his fault he was like that, and he had to take responsibility on that.

He Tian would gladly, so he just pressed the video call button, surprised when he was answered right away.

“What happened?” He Tian asked, clearly still in awe.

“ _You_.” Mo Guan Shan answered, his voice low. “ _After everything we went through so I’d give you the green light you touch me once, and then never again_.”

“Why didn’t you touch me instead?”

“ _Can you see me doing that?_ ”

He Tian couldn’t. All of their demonstrations of affection towards one another had somehow being initiated by He Tian, when he was sure Mo Guan Shan wanted it as well. The only times Mo Guan Shan initiated it, he didn’t really took on action, but he rather said something that made He Tian act instead.

“So why are you doing it now?” He Tian knew poking Mo Guan Shan wasn’t the smartest of the ideas, but the way his voice was deep and his breathing was ragged, it just made He Tian want to tease.

“ _Because you made me like this_.” Mo Guan Shan’s room was only lit by the lamp on his desk, but it was still enough for He Tian to notice the gritting teeth and the deep furrowed brows. “ _Take responsibility_.”

“What can I do, though? It’s not like I’m there with you.” Seemingly, playing with fire had become He Tian’s favorite activity after meeting Mo Guan Shan, especially after he started dating the boy.

“ _You’re fucking playing with me_.” He breathed out in what He Tian couldn’t tell if it was a huff or a sigh. “ _Fine, I’ll let you sleep, then, goodnight_.”

But before Mo Guan Shan could finish their videocall, He Tian stopped him.

“Ok, caught red-handed, fine.” He Tian said hasty. “What are you doing?”

“ _Wasting my fucking time talking to you_.”

“That wasn’t my question, Little Mo.”

“ _What do you_ want _me to do?_ ” Mo Guan Shan asked and He Tian’s eyes shone with interest when that happened.

So he wanted He Tian to tell him what to do? Nice turn of events.

“Touch yourself, and let me see it.”

He Tian didn’t get an answer. Not even an annoyed huff or a curse. The only thing he got was Mo Guan Shan’s annoyed expression disappearing from the screen as he probably had placed his cellphone somewhere flat, some rustling sounds, and then the phone was picked up again. Soon Mo Guan Shan was placing the device on the far side of the bed, maybe leaning against the headboard, and He Tian – finally – had a full view of what was going on.

He tried not to, but it was impossible for He Tian not to swallow the lump in his throat and wet his lips when Mo Guan Shan stopped moving. He was kneeling on the bed, the same position he was when he sent the picture, but his boxers were no longer covering his erection. He Tian could clearly see that Mo Guan Shan was hard – and probably for a while, since the tip was shining – and flushed. But what made everything better was the fact that he had only taken the boxers off.

He Tian’s jacket was still hugging Mo Guan Shan’s body, covering his arms and elbows but hanging loosely on the shoulders, which revealed more of the skin on Mo Guan Shan’s neck and collarbone. If He Tian was ever asked what the sexiest thing he had ever seen in his life was, that image from Mo Guan Shan would easily be chosen as the top one.

And that was still before Mo Guan Shan’s left hand left his side and circled around his dick, pumping it once, twice, only to stop. He Tian’s eyes then traveled all the way up again, noticing Mo Guan Shan was looking at him with an expression he had to still unravel.

“ _Are you making me do this alone?_ ” Came his low voice in a whisper. “ _I wanna see you too_.”

That sentence was more than enough to make a jolt travel all the way through He Tian’s body, ending right at the tip of his dick, making it twitch and He Tian notice that over the course of the past minutes, he had grown as hard as he could possibly become. And that was enough to make He Tian discard his sweatpants and boxers as fast as he could, and place his phone on the coffee table in front of him.

“You know exactly what you do to me, don’t you?” He Tian hissed through his teeth, jerking off his cock lightly.

“ _You suck at dirty talk_.” Mo Guan Shan said, and when He Tian looked at his face, he could notice the ghost of a smirk.

“Is that what you want, Guan Shan? You want me to talk dirty to you?”

“ _Guess._ ”

“You want me to tell you to imagine me kissing you, licking you, biting you.”

“ _You can do better than that._ ”

He Tian cursed, trying to keep his cool and not let the fact that Mo Guan Shan was playing with him get to him. Or the fact that Mo Guan Shan, who at first looked like the wrecked one, was just pumping his erection slowly, and yet He Tian was on the verge of losing it just by looking at Mo Guan Shan.

“You’re gonna pay for it.” He threatened. “Next time I lay my hands on you, Mo Guan Shan,” He Tian’s breaths were ragged, but he didn’t let it be a nuisance, “I’m gonna suck you so hard you’re gonna forget your own name.”

“ _What else?_ ” Mo Guan Shan’s question was something between a whine and a groan, and it didn’t matter what it was, He Tian’s dick surely liked it.

“I’m gonna open you up, or myself, it doesn’t matter.” He kneeled on the couch and leaned on the coffee table, balancing his weight on his left arm while his right hand worked on his cock. “And then I’m gonna fuck you.”

“ _Are you?_ ” It was hard to listen to what Mo Guan Shan had said, so breathless he was, which made He Tian raise his head a little and look at the phone’s screen. Only to notice that Mo Guan Shan’s body was slightly curved backwards and his right arm was hidden behind his body.

“Yes.” He Tian hissed, focusing his eyes on Mo Guan Shan’s lower half and slowly realizing that the pumping movement wasn’t the only thing going on there. There was also a subtle, almost unperceivable motion happening behind Mo Guan Shan’s balls. “Are you fingering yourself?”

“ _Don’t ruin it_.”

“Fuck.” He Tian took a deep breath and tried to organize his thoughts. He couldn’t let the fact that Mo Guan Shan was masturbating and fingering right in front of him – not really, but details – get to him. He had to give Mo Guan Shan what he wanted. “I’m gonna fuck you, Guan Shan, but I’m not gonna rush it.”

He Tian bit his lip, trying to make his body obey his brain for a second and not succumb to Mo Guan Shan’s erotic scene. He had to make pressure around the base of his dick to prevent himself from coming way too soon. He Tian couldn’t come before Mo Guan Shan, not when Mo Guan Shan was the one being needy for once and provoking him first. He had to wreck Mo Guan Shan, make him crumble to tiny little pieces while calling He Tian’s name.

“I’m gonna go slow, so slow that you’re gonna beg for me to go faster.” That wasn’t true. He Tian knew he wouldn’t have the self-control necessary to not fuck Mo Guan Shan senseless until both of them were panting of exhaustion, but he could always at least try, though. “And after you beg, I’ll go just a little faster, so I can make you keep on begging.”

But somehow that was working. Mo Guan Shan was slowly becoming louder – which made He Tian wonder if the boy was alone at home – and He Tian could actually hear the squelching noises coming from both Mo Guan Shan’s front and rear. His mouth was hung open and his eyes were shut closed, nose pointing up on such a blissful state that if He Tian didn’t know better, he would say Mo Guan Shan was having an orgasm.

“I’ll tell you how good you feel around me, how your voice make me lose my damn mind and how I’m controlling myself not to go faster.”

Mo Guan Shan’s hand – s, maybe? – moved faster and faster.

“And I won’t let you come, not that easy.” And when Mo Guan Shan let out a long moan, He Tian smirked. “You know why?”

“ _Fuck, just fucking tell me_.”

“Because I want you to fuck me. I want you to fuck me fast and deep until I forget how to talk.” He groaned, increasing his hand’s speed. “Until the only thing I can do is spread my damn legs wider so you can make me scream.” He was close, too close, but apparently so was Mo Guan Shan. “And you’ll make me come without touching my dick, and my hole is gonna be so tight you won’t be able to hold anymore.”

“ _Fu-ck_!” Mo Guan Shan moaned, loud and lewd, as his dick twitched in his hand and his chest was dirtied by – or at least He Tian imagined – white stripes of cum.

It was also enough to tip He Tian over the edge, and as soon as the image of Mo Guan Shan having an orgasm was burned on his retinas, He Tian was washed away by his own, unable to hold his voice while he called Mo Guan Shan’s name. A couple minutes later, when the high was already leaving He Tian alone, he heard Mo Guan Shan say, albeit low:

“ _Thank you_.”

“I feel like I should be the one thanking you.” He Tian chuckled. “It was a hell of a picture and a hell of a ride.”

“ _The finals begin tomorrow, He Tian_.” Mo Guan Shan whispered and He Tian couldn’t help but to think he sounded sweet. “ _I was anxious_.”

“You’re not anxious anymore?”

“ _Of course I am_.” He grinned and shook his head. “ _But at least now I’m tired enough to sleep_.”

“So you just used me?” He faked being hurt.

“ _Yes, and you enjoyed every little bit of it_.” Now, with Mo Guan Shan’s face way closer to the camera, He Tian could see that he was indeed smirking. “ _Good night_.”

“Good night.”

* * *

He Tian send Mo Guan Shan a message as soon as he woke up, telling the latter he would pick him up earlier than usual, as He Tian wanted to go through a few concepts that could be on the test before the bell rang. That meant that both of them got to school with an hour to study, which lead them to sit side by side on Mo Guan Shan’s classroom.

Mo Guan Shan answered He Tian’s sample questions like a robot, showing He Tian that he had learned at least the basics and that he wouldn’t do bad on the tests. However, he knew he also wouldn’t excel. But Mo Guan Shan was happy with average, and if average was enough to get him into high school, then it didn’t matter much in the end of the day.

What both boys weren’t expecting was the fact that when it was about five minutes before the finals started, a horde – and that time it wasn’t ten maximum, there were at least thirty people there – of girls tried entering the classroom at the same time. After hearing the ruckus, Mo Guan Shan looked at the door, noticing some of the girls trying to fit in the room were carrying something with glossy pages.

A magazine.

“You gotta be fucking kidding me.” Mo Guan Shan mumbled to He Tian, point at one of the girls in the front.

“Good morning, girls.” He Tian stood up and walked to the door, making the amalgamation of girls step backwards as he gently pushed them out of the classroom. “Why don’t we talk after the tests are done?” He offered, giving them one of his best lady killer smiles. “Please?”

That seemed to do the trick, as the crowd started to disperse as soon as He Tian’s magical words worked their way into their ears. Despite the other students’ confusion, He Tian just shrugged it off, like nothing had actually happened, and waved to Mo Guan Shan, vanishing through the halls so he could get to his classroom before the bell rang. He Tian knew Mo Guan Shan would be fine, they had studied a lot.

* * *

Mo Guan Shan did do fine. At least sixty-five percent of each test he did that day, Mo Guan Shan was sure he got the answers right. Of course that left thirty-five percent in the dark, but sixty-five was more than enough for Mo Guan Shan to graduate in middle school. As for the entrance exam, he would certainly have at least another two weeks to study before it.

He could almost taste the little victory – and he could tell the small ones certainly felt good.

Still, they had tests on Saturday as well, besides the fact that both Mo Guan Shan and He Tian would have to deal with at least thirty girls babbling on their ears and asking never-ending questions about their appearance together on that magazine issue. Mo Guan Shan knew He Tian could deal with it on his own, but the way the girls were also eyeing him when they tried getting inside the classroom, he knew he would be under the spotlight – for the second time, damn it.

However, it wasn’t like he could run away from it. Whereas it would be that day or the following, or even the following week, Mo Guan Shan knew how those girls could be persistent and wouldn’t leave him alone until they had all of their questions answered, and how Mo Guan Shan enjoyed his alone time – sometimes with He Tian – and he would be deprived of it if the girls didn’t get what they wanted, Mo Guan Shan decided that sooner he talked to them, better.

“You know, I always thought the four of you were handsome, but this was something else.” Mo Guan Shan heard a known voice as soon as he entered He Tian’s classroom.

He felt like Moses when the girls split in two groups, giving him space to walk towards He Tian.

“The four of us?” He Tian asked, and soon Mo Guan Shan recognized the owner of the voice – the annoying girl from the previous week.

“You know, you, Guan Shan, Jian Yi and Zheng Xi.”

“What about us?” Mo Guan Shan asked, not really interested about what she was talking, but pretending so he could see himself free from them soon.

“Except for you,” she pointed at Mo Guan Shan, “all of the others have their parcel of fans scattered around the school.” Her movements were way too wide, she reminded Mo Guan Shan of Jian Yi. “Zheng Xi was only noticed after he got that haircut, though, then the girls realized why Xiao Hui was so into him.”

“Xiao Hui?” He Tian asked. “Love Letter girl?”

“That’s gonna haunt the poor girl forever.” The girl chuckled and He Tian and Mo Guan Shan looked at each other. “So yeah,” she kept going, “but then today the world was turned upside down.”

“Those pictures were something.” Another girl said.

“I already knew Guan Shan was a handsome guy, though.” The first girl restarted talking. “I even asked you on a date, right?”

“And I said no, so get to the point.”

“Ok, so the thing is.” A third girl opened the magazine on a determined page and pointed at it. “Some of those pictures look like they’re implying something.”

“As in?” He Tian made a hand movement for the girl to keep on talking.

“Well, we all know the four of you are friends,” great, they were digressing again, “and that Jian Yi and Zheng Xi definitely have something.”

That made both He Tian and Mo Guan Shan look at the girls confused. Because even though Jian Yi was madly in love with Zhan Zheng Xi and the latter was rather oblivious about his own feelings, they weren’t officially a thing. Still, apparently everybody thought otherwise.

“They don’t really, but where are you getting?” He Tian said calm, earning several eye-rolls from the girls, who couldn’t believe what he had just said.

“We started wondering if you two were too.” The girl who hit on Mo Guan Shan before said, and the other girl near her showed them a picture where both boys’ faces were way too close, yet neither seemed uncomfortable.

“I mean,” the girl who was showing the magazine interrupted,” it’s not like we’d judge or anything. We just wanted to know.”

“Besides,” another one said, “since all of us like one of you – if not both, it would certainly be fairer if you were to date each other, instead of one of us.”

“We’d get mad if one of you started dating another girl, with the entire _why her and not me_ b-s, but it’s not like we’d be able to compete if you were dating each other, we’re not boys after all.” A fifth one said, giggling shyly afterwards.

There wasn’t a better word to describe Mo Guan Shan other than flabbergasted. He was caught one hundred percent by surprise – first: he would never think those pictures would result on those thoughts, second: he would never think He Tian’s fans would be ok with him dating anyone, third: especially if that anyone was Mo Guan Shan – by how sharp those girls could be.

Mo Guan Shan’s eyes – slitted, probably over thinking – met with He Tian’s – playfully mischievous – as if he was trying to find the answer they should give the girls within the depths of He Tian. And although it didn’t matter how much Mo Guan Shan’s mind repeated the _‘who needs to know already does’_ he had said a week prior, he couldn’t see himself lying about it without being caught.

“That’s a rather personal question.” He Tian chuckled to hide his – _embarrassment? He Tian?_

“Come on,” the most insistent of the girls, lady _I have a crush on Mo Guan Shan_ , retorted, “those pictures are all over the city and will be all over China soon enough. By the way you guys are close, it will take no time for the rumors to start.”

“What are you implying at?” Mo Guan Shan asked that time, scowl deep and eyes piercing.

“Do you want me to list?” She cackled. “I can list.”

Nobody said a word, the girl took it as the cue to go on.

“Because some of your delinquent friends, Guan Shan, I know that He Tian started pestering you after you and Zheng Xi beat each other.” She said with one finger standing. “Then after that there was that incident you two fought each other near the basketball court.” A second finger. “Back then we all just thought He Tian was playing with you, maybe bullying you even.”

“He was definitely annoying the shit outta me.” He agreed with the girl, finally looking at her.

“But then there was the _incident that shall not be named_ ,” she raised a third finger, “as He Tian has already grown _intense_ , and notice that I am being euphemistic, when someone tried to mention it and we don’t want to get hurt. And I don’t know if you know that, Guan Shan, but He Tian said, for at least three-quarters of the school that your business is his business.”

“You fucking said that?” Mo Guan Shan turned to He Tian, a mix of embarrassment and disbelief.

“Was I lying?” Mo Guan Shan didn’t answer; he just bit the inner side of his cheek.

“After that incident, He Tian was all handsy with you, and the only person he was handsy with before was Jian Yi.” She started raising the fourth finger. “But he stopped it completely when you entered the equation.” And then she finished raising it. “Then we had the day you played the guitar on the rooftop, that if I were to describe the way He Tian was looking at you, I’d say _adoration_.” All five fingers stretched and palm showing.

“I didn’t know he could actually play it, who’d think sing as well.” He Tian tried to defend himself, but he ended up talking too much. “And I was the one who gave him the guitar.”

“You gave him the guitar?” A few girls asked in unison, shocked.

“Yeah, because he took care of me when I was sick.”

And to that, Mo Guan Shan could only facepalm. Especially after noticing the girl’s five fingers from her right hand were soon joined by two fingers from her left hand.

“Reasons six and seven that were unknown up until now, girls.”

“You talk too much, He Tian.” Mo Guan Shan spat, his eyes still looking at the class’ floor.

“Well,” the girl raised a brow, “that is–,” she began, but shook her head and said instead, “and then the eighth and last reason is the fact that you two modeled together in some pretty shameless poses and neither of you look embarrassed.”

Mo Guan Shan then took a deep sigh, raising his head once again and showing not only the girls, but also He Tian, that he was slightly flushed. It wasn’t a deep red and someone would have to squint to actually see it, but there was a faint pink hue sitting on Mo Guan Shan’s cheek. And he was chewing his bottom lip. He Tian didn’t need to be a psychic to know that he was considering telling the girls the truth.

“You girls are seriously ok with me dating him?” He Tian asked, trying to keep the girls’ eyes on him. “I mean, you all were saying some nasty stuff about him just a few months ago.”

“He’s not a bad person,” one girl commented, “I guess it was just the delinquent reputation that got us to stereotype.”

“And the worst thing he has actually done was fight Zhan Zheng Xi, and we all know Zhan Zheng Xi is friends with him.” Another one said.

“He even went out of his way to prove his innocence.” A third one.

“That was actually Jian Yi’s idea.” Mo Guan Shan shrugged.

“But he could’ve said no, said that you deserved the blame.” The same one retorted. “He didn’t.”

Mo Guan Shan thought about arguing that Zhan Zheng Xi did basically anything Jian Yi told him to do, but as they would probably find a counter-argument, he just kept his mouth shut.

“So in summary,” the first girl, and Mo Guan Shan slightly regretted not having asked her name before, completed, “yes, we would be fine with you two dating each other.”

It was He Tian’s turn to look at Mo Guan Shan, only to realize the latter wasn’t looking back. Instead, he was fumbling with the fabric of his sweatpants and chewing even harder on his bottom lip – _stop, you’re gonna bruise it_ – and thinking way too hard about something that He Tian was somewhat sure about what it was.

“It’s true.” Mo Guan Shan’s voice said in a murmur. “It’s fucking true.”

He Tian smirked when he saw every single girl’s eyes widening, and he outstretched his hand to grab Mo Guan Shan’s, who promptly held it – stronger than He Tian expected ( _Gosh he must be a nervous wreck now_ ). He thumbed the backside of Mo Guan Shan’s hand, giving him the strength necessary to keep on talking.

“We’ve actually been dating for a while.”

And to complete to the wide eyes look, now their mouths were open in perfect shaped ‘o’s’ and He Tian wondered if it would be too childish to try to throw a small ball of paper inside their mouths. It would be. Not only childish, but also rude.

“So that’s why you rejected me!” The first girl exclaimed, palms hitting each other on a single clap. “Since when?”

“Now that,” He Tian intervened, “is truly none of your business.”

_Well, that went better than you expected_. Mo Guan Shan’s inner demons, who were quite silent over the past few weeks, decided to show up once more. _Now everything is out in the open, so you can actually make out with him whenever and wherever you want_. And that last comment made Mo Guan Shan let go of He Tian’s hand and press his fingers on his temples and make a pained expression.

“That was all you girls wanted to know?” He asked.

“That and if you two are gonna pose together ever again.” A random girl answered.

“We don’t know that,” Mo Guan Shan sighed, “since that’s all, I’m gonna go home, that conversation drained the hell outta me.”

He Tian thought about offering to walk him home, but by the way that classroom looked, he knew that even though the girls had said they were done, they were actually far from it. So He Tian decided to take a bullet for the team and stay. He knew Mo Guan Shan needed to rest, they still had tests on the following day.

* * *

Saturday was easier than Friday, to Mo Guan Shan’s joy. The subjects tested were the ones he had more affinity, which meant that not only he was more certain he got higher grades on those ones, he was also certain they – he and He Tian – wouldn’t have to study those subjects again, and would be able to focus on the subjects Mo Guan Shan had difficulties instead.

The fact that this was the very last test day also meant that the school had only one more week of classes and soon they were being released to enjoy the summer break – and do the entrance exams to their chosen high school, too. Mo Guan Shan was excited that they would finally have a break, which meant he could oversleep, but the fact that he would go under study sessions with He Tian when he was supposed to enjoy the small vacation was surely discouraging.

Still, he had made unspoken promises and Mo Guan Shan was a man of his word – he tried his best, at least – so he decided to take the best he could out of it, so Jian Yi’s dreams could be fulfilled.

So, as they had agreed on the previous week, it didn’t matter if it was Saturday or if they had just finished taking tests, Mo Guan Shan would go to He Tian’s house later that day so they could at least review a little and Mo Guan Shan could cook for He Tian. _You mother’s cooking is divine, but I still prefer yours_ , He Tian had said once.

“Please, tell me we’re having beef stew today.” He Tian said right after stepping out of the bathroom, making his way directly to the kitchen.

“You asked for it at least fifteen times today,” Mo Guan Shan rolled his eyes, not really caring He Tian couldn’t see it, “so yes, we’re having stew.” He then tasted some of the broth and closed the lid, reducing the flames on the cooker. “I’m gonna let the broth thicken while I take a shower, try not to mess with it.”

“No promises.” He Tian said in an amused tone, messing with Mo Guan Shan. He then looked at the bubbling broth through the glass lid of the pan and shrugged, choosing to sit on the couch and browse through a magazine instead.

The magazine, whether it was a coincidence or not – probably not – was the same one he and Mo Guan Shan were featured in a random fashion article. There were seven pictures in total, in which two they were together, one had He Tian by himself and the other four were of Mo Guan Shan alone. He Tian would be lying if he said he wasn’t drawn to Mo Guan Shan’s pictures, tempted into staring at them all night long.

His favorite one – he liked them all of course, but if he were to pick – was the one Mo Guan Shan was sitting with his legs opened, elbows on knees and fingers intertwined as he looked directly at the camera with his usual and most definitely trademark frown. He Tian couldn’t explain why, but even though he was used to Mo Guan Shan’s everyday frown, it wasn’t like this one was the same.

It was like Mo Guan Shan was staring directly at his soul, undressing him of every single mask he would wear and seeing He Tian for what he was. And at the same time, it was like Mo Guan Shan was daring He Tian to come and take off Mo Guan Shan’s masks as well, leaving them both bare for each other, with the only remaining feeling being complete, utter, trust.

He Tian chuckled with those thoughts, feeling silly when he realized how much he was reading into just one picture, but still unable to go against this thoughts. It wasn’t the only thing his mind thought of that picture, though. Besides the fact of feeling exposed to that piercing gaze, He Tian also felt seduced by it, trying to understand how someone could be so tempting with just a single stare.

He got so lost in thought that he only realized Mo Guan Shan was done with his shower and the food was already on the table just waiting to be eaten when there was a light touch on his shoulder and an annoyed – _embarrassed?_ – voice talking to him.

“You’re gonna put a hole on the magazine.” Mo Guan Shan spat. “Dinner’s ready.”

“Not my fault you look that handsome.” He Tian teased, getting up and giving Mo Guan Shan a soft peck on the lips after going to the table and sitting at it.

“You tryna sweet talk me?” Mo Guan Shan retorted, joining He Tian shortly after.

“Is it working?” He Tian re-retorted, smiled wide before he took the first bite. “Oh, I missed you cooking.”

“It may work,” Mo Guan Shan shrugged and started to eat, “keep trying so we can be sure.”

“Hn,” He Tian mused, “so if I tell you that you’re handsome, and you’re really good at cooking, and you’re hard-working and smart, I can use it to sweet talk you?”

“Who knows.”

That was what Mo Guan Shan said, but who was he kidding. He was perfectly aware that he had a thing for being praised, and although He Tian had just a hunch about it, Mo Guan Shan knew that after their video-call-phone-like-kinda-sex it was only a matter of time before He Tian’s coin finally dropped, and it was doomed to happen sooner rather than later.

If Mo Guan Shan were to choose, he would rather have He Tian figure it out sooner, because then it meant all the teasing and jokes would happen as soon as possible, leaving only the benefits behind. Because Mo Guan Shan knew that if He Tian knew being praised got Mo Guan Shan off, he would use it to his advantage. That was how dirty He Tian played.

Not only that, but the things He Tian had said over the phone that Thursday night were still dancing on Mo Guan Shan’s mind, and he couldn’t help but to wonder how his body would react if He Tian were to actually do the things he said he would do. Mo Guan Shan reached a point that even though he knew He Tian was trying his best at dirty talk – but he surely needed more practice – he also wondered if there was some truth to his words.

“–Shan?” Mo Guan Shan was awakened from his daydream as He Tian called his name. His bowl was empty and he stared at Mo Guan Shan.

“Did you say something?”

“Yes, I was asking if you’re done eating.” And the Mo Guan Shan realized He Tian was also standing by his side, willing to take his own dirty bowl to the kitchen sink.

“Ah, yeah.” He said, ignoring that he had barely touched his bowl. “Not really hungry today.”

“Too much in your mind?” He Tian asked as he put the leftover beef stew in a plastic container and placed it inside the fridge.

“Guess so.” Mo Guan Shan answered, getting up from the table and walking to the kitchen island, leaning on the granite counter and observing as He Tian dumped his uneaten food in the bin and started washing the dishes.

At least He Tian knew how to wash dishes.

“Is it one of the _‘I prefer mourning about it on my own and suffering without telling anyone’_ or you wanna share with the class?”

“Very funny, He Tian.” Mo Guan Shan rolled his eyes. _It’s the thousandth time today_ , the voices murmured. “I was just thinking about some stuff you said before, wondering if you meant it.”

“You had my interest, now you have my attention.” He Tian rinsed the last bowl and his hands, drying it on the kitchen towel right afterwards. He then turned around, leaning his lower back on the sink and crossing his arms in front of his body. “What exactly?”

“You know,” Mo Guan Shan gave the subtlest of the shrugs, his face again being tainted by that pink hue. That conversation would be way more comfortable if He Tian wasn’t staring directly at his soul at that right moment, “last Thursday.”

“When we were studying?” He Tian asked and Mo Guan Shan knew he was playing dumb, that jerk only wanted Mo Guan Shan to embarrass himself.

“When,” He took a deep breath and shook his head in a vain attempt of shooing the red away from his face, “we’re having phone sex.”

“You actually said it.” He Tian smirked, making Mo Guan Shan wish he could punch that smile from his face. “So you thought I didn’t mean it?”

“Never said that,” he sighed, “I was just wondering.”

“Do you want me to prove I mean it?” As he said it, Mo Guan Shan saw him moving closer, crossing the kitchen and leaning his elbows on the kitchen counter, in the opposite side as Mo Guan Shan.

Those words made Mo Guan Shan hold his breath for a second, thinking that if he wasn’t careful enough around those eggshells, he could end up wrecked that very night. But in all honesty, he couldn’t really lie about actually wanting it to happen, which made him say _fuck it_ to the eggshells and just crack them all. _You want him to mess you up in every way he knows, don’t you?_ To what he answered a loud:

“Yes.”

One thing that Mo Guan Shan adored in He Tian’s eyes was the fact that most of the time they were grey, but once He Tian was angry – or horny – they would grow pitch black, as if those dark irises were eating their prey alive. And when Mo Guan Shan looked deep into the burning coal that were He Tian’s eyes that moment, he knew he had become his prey, and there was no turning back.

Before Mo Guan Shan could turn around, He Tian was already behind him, pressing their bodies against one another and Mo Guan Shan’s body against the counter. He Tian dove on the curve of his neck, breathing in his scent before placing an open mouthed kiss to that patch of skin. Mo Guan Shan closed his eyes and tightened the grip of his hands, which were holding the edges of the counter.

The kissing and nipping on his neck, nape and shoulder felt delicious and were definitely telling his dick to come and party, but Mo Guan Shan felt like he wanted much more than that. He wanted to kiss He Tian and forget everything that wasn’t the boy standing right behind him. Mo Guan Shan was a goner and he knew it, still he couldn’t care less.

He Tian, luckily, was acting like he could read Mo Guan Shan’s thoughts, since as soon as his mind wished they could kiss, he was turned around and their chests were pressed against one another. He Tian then looked deep at Mo Guan Shan’s light-orange eyes and leaned in, taking Mo Guan Shan’s lips on a bruising kiss.

Mo Guan Shan opened his mouth and let He Tian explore it all with his tongue, while his short nails clawed at He Tian’s black shirt, trying to ball clothing between his fingers, but unable to do it because of how tight the shirt was. So he raised his hands instead, pulling He Tian’s hair while he was devoured by that voracious mouth.

“When you were taking those pictures,” He Tian whispered on Mo Guan Shan’s ear, his warm breath sending shivers all over Mo Guan Shan’s body, “I had to control myself so damn hard. You looked so damn sexy that I just wanted to take you right then and there, in front of everybody.”

“Because you’re a damn pervert.”

“Bite me.” He Tian grinned and Mo Guan Shan leaned in; he wasn’t really in the mood of talking.

The second time they parted, He Tian came back to Mo Guan Shan’s neck, but he was working on the other side instead. As if he wanted to be thorough with his work, he was giving the exact same attention he gave the left side, now on the right one. And as he kissed and nibbled, he began walking backwards, dragging Mo Guan Shan with him – his hands were nested on Mo Guan Shan’s hips, after all.

They bumped on the couch and on the coffee table on the way, but soon enough He Tian was leaving Mo Guan Shan’s neck so the latter’s could have his shirt removed. He Tian’s shirt followed shortly after and before Mo Guan Shan had a chance of touching He Tian – _your fingers are itching to touch him_ – he was being pushed on the bed.

If someone had asked Mo Guan Shan his thoughts on being manhandled a few months prior, he would tell the person to _fuck the fuck off_ and go away. But at that right moment, with He Tian pushing and pulling him, rubbing on Mo Guan Shan’s face how much stronger He Tian was than him, the only thing Mo Guan Shan could think was how it turned him on.

However, those inner debates were starting to become more and more difficult – _stop thinking, dumbass_ – as He Tian descended on his chest, circling a nipple, but not lapping at it. It was like he was purposely avoiding all of the spots Mo Guan Shan had already showed He Tian were sensitive. It was like he wanted Mo Guan Shan to lose his mind before the real fun would begin.

And although it was working for the first couple of minutes, Mo Guan Shan soon grew annoyed with He Tian and pulled him closer by his hair, kissing him deeply while his free hand roamed through He Tian’s body. He felt the strong muscles tremble under his light touches and the mouth mumble something intelligible that Mo Guan Shan didn’t care about.

Moments later, though, he realized that had been a moan, as he himself also let one out when He Tian’s own hands started mapping his body, and those two rough thumbs teased his nipples until they were erect, pinching them lightly as Mo Guan Shan whined against He Tian’s mouth.

Mo Guan Shan didn’t really like the fact of having sensitive nipples, as he also didn’t like the fact that He Tian could make him actually produce such embarrassing sounds during those situations, but all of that was pushed aside when He Tian – _fucking finally_ – left his mouth and sucked on his left nipple, lapping his pointy tongue on it afterwards. He knew he was sensitive, he knew it would feel good, but still he couldn’t accept he had let a moan because of that – just that.

“I don’t know if you noticed,” Mo Guan Shan mumbled between his much ragged breaths, “but you’ve got your hands on me.”

“I do,” He Tian agreed, sucking on Mo Guan Shan’s nipple to make him squirm between his words, “don’t I?”

“And I’m beginning to think you didn’t mean what you said.” He managed to say in a blurt after taking a deep breath. “Because you ain’t proving anything yet”

“Smart choice of words.” He Tian bit a nipple, smirking when Mo Guan Shan deepened his scowl. “Yet.”

And then, in a single swift move that Mo Guan Shan had to yet ask He Tian how he mastered, both his sweatpants and – _they were so damn tight, how did he removed it so easily_ – boxers ended up on the floor, by He Tian’s bed, and Mo Guan Shan was laid down on the mattress bare and exposed, suddenly feeling aware of his nakedness and the very much bright light lighting up the room from above.

But He Tian didn’t give Mo Guan Shan much time to dwell on the fact that he was naked and He Tian wasn’t, because as soon as He Tian returned to the bed, his mouth joined Mo Guan Shan’s and his hand found his crotch, pumping Mo Guan Shan so slowly that Mo Guan Shan could feel his eyes meeting the back of his head little by little.

Soon enough Mo Guan Shan couldn’t multitask well enough to respond to He Tian’s kisses while his brain only wanted to focus on the pleasure that sinful hand was giving him, so he didn’t even bother when He Tian left his mouth and started traveling down a second time. Chest – _damn sensitive nipples_ , abdomen – _lower_ , navel – _it tickles_ , happy trail – _you’re almost there_.

Mo Guan Shan, considering everything that had happened so far, thought He Tian would keep on taking everything slow, teasing him whenever he could, which made it impossible not to gasp when his dick was – _almost entirely_ – engulfed by such wet heat in such short amount of time. His gasp became a hiss shortly after, to finally grown into a full blown growl when he noticed He Tian was testing the limits of his gag reflex.

_If he’s trying to suck your soul outta your dick, he’s succeeding_ , the voices said as Mo Guan Shan shook his head to push them away. But even ignoring them, it was impossible not to agree with the fact that the action was mind-blowing – _no pun intended_. However, Mo Guan Shan knew it wasn’t mind-blowing because He Tian was particularly good at it – _for fucks sake I don’t have comparison_ , or simply the fact that it was the first time Mo Guan Shan was experiencing it – _and you want to repay the favor, don’t you? You’ve seen it; you’ve pictured it in your hand, in your mouth, in your ass_.

He Tian apparently didn’t have a gag reflex at all, as Mo Guan Shan could notice when the tip of his dick met with a tightness never experienced, and even with his teeth biting at his bottom lip full force – _yep, your lip is bleeding a little, congratulations, moron_ , he couldn’t stop the moans from leaving his mouth, echoing against the big white walls. What had He Tian promised again? Mo Guan Shan couldn’t remember. All he could remember was how to orgasm.

And orgasm he did, surfing each and every wave of bliss as he felt He Tian’s throat contracting around his dick while he swallowed his cum – _he’s swallowing it_? He tried to catch his breath when he opened his eyes, looking at a smiling He Tian, who looked way too proud of himself. Mo Guan Shan reached for He Tian’s sweatpants, trying to bring him closer in that sluggish state – _his lips are so red and so swollen, you wanna kiss him so bad_ , only to have his hand slapped away.

“Believe me, it tastes really bad, you won’t want to kiss me right now.” He smiled. “Let me wash my mouth.”

Mo Guan Shan thought about retorting, telling He Tian he wasn’t that prissy, but his body was way too heavy from the orgasm high and he really wasn’t feeling like talking. Besides, He Tian didn’t even take that long to come back, and soon those full lips were kissing Mo Guan Shan as if He Tian’s life depended on it.

“Where’s the lube?” Mo Guan Shan asked between kisses, trying not to chuckle when he saw He Tian reaching blindingly for his bedside drawer.

“ _Fuck_.” He Tian mumbled when he realized he actually needed to search for it, parting his mouth from Mo Guan Shan’s for exact five seconds.

When He Tian had the lube bottle between his fingers, he came back to the bed, kneeling between Mo Guan Shan’s legs as the latter – _lost your shame when you left Narnia?_ – spread them, giving him easier access to that one place Mo Guan Shan knew could take him to the moon and back.

“You want me to fuck you that bad?” He Tian asked, supposedly in a teasing tone that actually came out more like eager.

“Shut up.” Mo Guan Shan mumbled and as he didn’t close his legs, He Tian took it as a yes.

He Tian did shut up. He wanted to tease Mo Guan Shan, but the situation he was in, his teasing would likely end up being fired back at him. So to shut up as best as he could, He Tian kissed Mo Guan Shan, the thoughts of how their mouths grew to fit each other so perfectly wandering in his mind, he also fumbled with the lube bottle showing He Tian he had another thing to master – multitasking.

After enough efforts wasted, however, He Tian managed to open the lid and pour some of the clear lube on his fingers, spreading it slowly and warming it in consequence. His left hand then reached Mo Guan Shan’s ass, and once he had knead the soft skin, he used his fingers to pull one of the cheeks apart.

Mo Guan Shan felt even more exposed when He Tian parted his ass cheeks, yet he chose not to dwell on it and just try and relax instead – _you know what’s coming_.

When He Tian’s slick index finger probed on Mo Guan Shan’s hole, he sighed. Slowly his mouth and tongue stopped moving against He Tian’s, since the light massage right on his ass was making it harder to focus on more than one thing at once. And when He Tian’s finger finally slipped in, a bit uncomfortable, but not painful, Mo Guan Shan couldn’t help but to press his mouth on a thin line and take a deep breath, trying not to make an embarrassment of himself – _like you did earlier._

Opposite to when He Tian was sucking Mo Guan Shan off, he was now taking his time. Thrusting one finger in and out, calmly and slowly, learning Mo Guan Shan’s reactions one by one. His left hand cupped Mo Guan Shan’s cheek, thumbing little circles as he observed the closed eyes and the deep breathing. Once he was sure Mo Guan Shan was used to it – _He doesn’t know how many times you did this on your own imagining it was his dick instead, does he, Little Mo?_ –, He Tian took the index off, and when it came back in, it had been joined by the middle finger.

The stretch was known and welcome, and Mo Guan Shan would even dare to say pleasant – if it wasn’t for the discomfort of having something up his ass. But it didn’t matter how Mo Guan Shan had grown to like the feeling of fingers sliding inside his hole, he knew he wouldn’t enjoy it to the fullest if He Tian didn’t massage his prostate. Mo Guan Shan didn’t know if He Tian was avoiding it on purpose, or was just not trying to find it, and either way was frustrating.

“You’re hard again.” He Tian whispered on his ear, his lips taking advantage of it to suck on Mo Guan Shan’s earlobe. “Want a third one?”

He Tian wanted to smirk when Mo Guan Shan didn’t answer, but whimpered instead, he was way too concentrated on his task at hand, though, so he didn’t. As He Tian removed the two fingers and put on three when he was back at it, he started thinking about the things he had said to Mo Guan Shan when they had phone sex.

He remembered saying he would take his time, saying that he wanted to make Mo Guan Shan beg him to go faster because the slow pace wasn’t as near as enough to make him come. But He Tian was hard, and opposed to Mo Guan Shan he hadn’t had an orgasm yet. It wasn’t hurting, no, actually it would take another two or three hours for it to happen, yet He Tian had seen himself on the edge many times as he worshipped Mo Guan Shan, only to cool down moments before coming.

Because of that, He Tian was genuinely afraid, not necessarily of not being able to control himself and go fast and hard, but actually of not being able to control himself and come as soon as he was inside. He Tian was a virgin, he had never fucked anybody before, the only thing he had felt around his dick were his own fingers, which made every single one of his fears more scarier than it should be.

“I need your help.” He Tian said.

“What for?” Mo Guan Shan managed to say, trying to focus on He Tian’s voice instead of the fingers thrusting and curling inside his ass.

“I need you to make me come.”

“Now?”

“Unless you want me to come as soon as I enter you.” He chuckled. “We’re fifteen, Guan Shan, our refractory time is super short.”

“Our what?”

“Nothing,” He Tian sighed, “just do what I asked, ok?”

“Fine.”

To make things easier for Mo Guan Shan, He Tian took off his fingers and moved to his side, lowering his sweatpants and boxers up to his middle thighs. He chose the ignore how Mo Guan Shan bit his already bruised lip when he looked at him and moved his right hand back to Mo Guan Shan’s ass, penetrating him with the three fingers and thrusting it slowly.

Soon Mo Guan Shan’s left hand circled He Tian’s dick, giving it one halfheartedly pump, only to notice he needed to change his hand position. As He Tian had told him he would probably come as soon as he penetrated Mo Guan Shan, the logical conclusion was that He Tian was extremely close. Mo Guan Shan surely felt like testing this theory, so once he found a viable way of jerking He Tian off, he took no time to speed up.

It didn’t even take a whole minute and He Tian’s fingers were faltering, his mouth opening, his breath hitching and his dick coming.

“You weren’t kidding, huh.” It was Mo Guan Shan’s time to mock He Tian, who probably didn’t even hear it as he still felt the bliss.

A few moments later, He Tian’s fingers restarted thrusting in and out of Mo Guan Shan’s hole, and his mouth sought for the other’s, kissing him as soon as they met. He Tian’s tongue invaded Mo Guan Shan’s mouth, and He Tian could do whatever he wanted, since Mo Guan Shan was back to his lost in pleasure self and wasn’t aware enough to actually correspond.

Mouth, ear, neck and collarbone were explored a second, a third and a fourth time, and then – _fucking jerk took his sweet time to do it_ – He Tian thrust in his fingers deeper, curling them inside Mo Guan Shan’s walls in a blind search for his prostate. It took all of He Tian’s patience, but after long minutes in an infuriating try and error sequence, He Tian was rewarded with a strained, yet long, whine.

If Mo Guan Shan wasn’t so attached to the little pride that he still had, he would’ve thanked He Tian for having finally started thrusting his fingers against his _oh so_ sweet spot. But he knew he needed that last thread of pride, since he would only let himself be undressed of it once he had He Tian’s dick buried deep inside his ass. And boy did he want that to happen.

Looking down He Tian’s crotch, Mo Guan Shan noticed that the other boy was starting to grow hard once more, which made Mo Guan Shan outstretch his soiled left hand once more and help He Tian harden. He would’ve smirked when He Tian moaned because of his touch, but his mind was way lost in the sweet pleasure he was receiving from those long fingers.

“You’re hard.” It was time for Mo Guan Shan to whisper on He Tian’s ear, hissing when he felt the three fingers leaving his now gaping hole.

Mo Guan Shan observed as He Tian left the bed, wobbly due to the fact his pants were in the middle of his thighs. Soon those same pants and boxers joined Mo Guan Shan’s clothes on the floor, and a couple condoms were being retrieved from the nightstand’s drawer. _Two condoms?_

He didn’t have a chance to ask, as He Tian was already rolling one of them on his dick – and lubing it – and climbing on the bed. Mo Guan Shan’s legs were then grabbed and He Tian – who was kneeling – pulled him closer by his shins. Even though he wanted to, Mo Guan Shan didn’t curse at He Tian, he was way busier feeling his ass get full of cock to be able to complain about being manhandled – _And you are also turned on by it, just admit it_.

The stretch of being penetrated by He Tian’s dick was definitely painful, but it was also bearable. The fullness sensation was somewhat new, because although Mo Guan Shan had played with his own ass plenty of times before, it certainly couldn’t be compared to a real penis. Once he felt He Tian stop pushing further and He Tian’s thighs pressing against his ass cheeks, Mo Guan Shan raised his upper body and kissed He Tian.

He Tian took advantage of it to pull Mo Guan Shan into his lap, deepening the kiss as he started thrusting up. His hips moved in a slow pace, while his hands helped Mo Guan Shan follow his movements. The pressure on his dick was something He Tian wasn’t able to picture in his fantasies, and he was glad he had asked for Mo Guan Shan’s help earlier.

Mo Guan Shan also thought how his dreams were so far from the reality. He hadn’t pictured the pain or the fullness, his mind clouded by the horniness that the only remaining thought was the one of pleasure. But of course, Mo Guan Shan knew there was pleasure, he could already feel the trial version of it, yet he wanted the full one.

So, after the demons made sure to remind him of the phone sex he had with He Tian, Mo Guan Shan decided it was finally time to let go completely of his pride and do the one thing he had never assumed he would. Beg.

“He Tian, go faster.” He said on He Tian’s lips, licking them and opening his eyes, meeting two dark ones clouded with desire.

“Why should I?” He Tian retorted, mimicking Mo Guan Shan’s actions. “It feels so good like this.”

It did, Mo Guan Shan agreed, but it wasn’t enough.

“ _Please_.”

_And there we have it, Mo Guan Shan’s lower point_. But Mo Guan Shan didn’t care for the demons. They could mock him all they wanted and Mo Guan Shan didn’t give a shit. And he didn’t give a shit because as soon as that single word left his mouth on a breathless whisper, He Tian towered over him, laying him on the bed again, and started speeding up his hips movements.

He Tian then grabbed one of Mo Guan Shan’s legs, putting his arm under it so he could raise it, being then able to go deeper inside of Mo Guan Shan. Although he was going deeper, his thrusts were still relatively slow, which meant that when his dick pressed against Mo Guan Shan’s prostate, he – Mo Guan Shan – could only feel overwhelmed by such torturing stimulation.

“Faster.” He whispered again. “Please.” _I wanna come_ , was the subliminal message.

So He Tian put his other arm under Mo Guan Shan’s other leg and raised it as he raised his own upper body. With both of Mo Guan Shan’s shins on his shoulders, the change of angle was inevitable, which made He Tian go even deeper and abuse Mo Guan Shan’s – _please, harder, more_ – sweet spot even more.

At that point Mo Guan Shan had already forgotten any sense of shame and he wasn’t trying to restrain his voice anymore, which filled the room with loud and long moans of _ah_ ’s and what would probably be _deeper_ and _more_ and different sets of curse words. The only thing Mo Guan Shan could think of was the fact that he had never felt like this before, and even though his ass still hurt, it was easy to ignore it once the delight of having his prostate hit washed him.

And then He Tian came. Even though he wasn’t going fast, the pressure around his dick and the way Mo Guan Shan’s walls contracted whenever He Tian brushed against his prostate were more than enough to send He Tian over the edge way sooner than expected. Not that it was a bad thing, He Tian had already planned other things to do if that happened, but he was still sad he wouldn’t enjoy Mo Guan Shan’s tightness a little bit longer.

“Can you open me up?” He asked after pulling out, taking off and tying the condom, and throwing it somewhere.

“You want me to fuck you?” Mo Guan Shan asked, trying to mask his confusion with eagerness.

“I thought I made that clear when I said…” He stopped to think for a second. “ _I want you to fuck me fast and deep until I forget how to talk_.”

Mo Guan Shan gulped.

He remembered when He Tian said that, of course he did, it was that – among what followed – what made Mo Guan Shan come undone during the phone sex. But he honestly wasn’t waiting for it to happen on their very first night having actual real – penetrating – sex. Not like he would deny it, not in a thousand years, he was more than willing to know how it would feel to have something as tight as an asshole pressing against his dick.

With that image in mind, Mo Guan Shan reached for the long lost lube bottle that was hidden somewhere in between the messy sheets and opened it, mimicking He Tian’s actions from earlier that day. Since He Tian – surprisingly – showed himself to be way more impatient than Mo Guan Shan, the latter wasn’t able to be as thorough as He Tian had been with him.

“Are you sure you want it fast and deep?” Mo Guan Shan asked one last time – he had asked at least three times while opening He Tian up already – as he aligned his cock with He Tian’s rear. “It hurts at first.”

“I know I it does.” He Tian smirked. “I like it when it does.”

That was enough to make Mo Guan Shan push his worries aside. He knew He Tian way too well to acknowledge he wouldn’t lie about something like this only to make Mo Guan Shan do what he wanted. If He Tian said he liked it fast, deep, and when it hurt, He Tian meant it.

Because of that, Mo Guan Shan did what He Tian did with him before and picked both of He Tian’s legs up – they were heavier than he imagined – and once they were on his shoulders, Mo Guan Shan pressed his tip in, entering He Tian in one fast, and most definitely deep, thrust.

He Tian moaned shamelessly when he was filled, letting his eyes roll to the back of his skull as the pain mixed with the pleasure of being stretched open filled his veins and send jolts of overstimulation to his dick.

And when Mo Guan Shan started his strong, fast and deep pace, He Tian was reduced to a pile of mush, and all his brain could do was scream in ecstasy because Mo Guan Shan knew exactly where to go to find his prostate. The fact that he had just had an orgasm, added to the overstimulation of having his sweet spot rammed made He Tian curve his back and come a third time that day – _He’s coming? But there’s no cum. But he looks like he’s coming._

The way He Tian got much tighter than before, and of course the fact that Mo Guan Shan was hard for a great amount of time, were more than enough to have him coming while groaning He Tian’s name, while he tried to kiss him, unsuccessfully.

“I didn’t touch your dick and you looked like you came.” Mo Guan Shan commented after lying beside He Tian. “How in the hell did you do that?”

“Overstimulation.” He Tian answered. “I basically made you ignore my refractory period and overstimulate me, which lead to an orgasm-ish.”

“Ok, now repeat the sentence in a language I can actually understand.” He Tian didn’t judge Mo Guan Shan, it was a fact he had just come and his brain wasn’t functioning at its best yet.

“I came, but I didn’t have time to get soft and then get hard again, so I sorta came again, but not really.”

“Is that a thing?”

He Tian shrugged.

After a few minutes catching his breath, Mo Guan Shan stood up and went to the bathroom. He removed the condom and tied it, throwing it in the bin. He looked tired – damn he felt tired – so he washed his face. It was already late and he had to still come back home. It wasn’t like he could show his mom this _Hey I just got laid_ face.

When he came back to He Tian’s bed, he searched for his clothes, dressing them slowly as he felt the first signs of soreness appear all over his body. Mo Guan Shan also noticed how He Tian looked at him in a longing way, as if it was a one night stand and Mo Guan Shan wouldn’t call him the morning after.

He Tian ended up putting on his underwear only, and following Mo Guan Shan – first to the kitchen, he wanted a glass of water – and then to the table – his backpack was there – and lastly to the front door of his apartment.

Mo Guan Shan was holding the backpack, standing at the front door when he felt He Tian’s hand grab his wrist lightly, in a probable mute plead for him to turn around. When he did so, he encountered He Tian with an unsettling sad expression that definitely didn’t match his handsome features. As his grip on his backpack wasn’t hard enough, it soon succumbed to gravity was fell on the floor. But Mo Guan Shan didn’t pay attention to it, all he could pay attention was He Tian’s mesmerizing stare.

“Stay.” He Tian asked in a soft whisper.

And that night, Mo Guan Shan stayed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guuuuys, it's oveeeeeeeeeer!!!
> 
> I can't believe Stay is oveeeeeeeeeeer!!!
> 
> This fanfic was my little baby for a long time, and now my little baby has grown and it's walking on its feet. Ah, babies grow fast HAHAH.
> 
> Once again, I am very sorry for the delay, but I hope I am forgiven.
> 
> The amazing art was commissioned by yours truly, and who drew it was the amazing @bisho-s (on tumblr).
> 
> By the way, did you guys notice that on the first chapter MGS stays, and then on the last chapter he stays again? I wanted to end the fanfiction on a full circle kind of note, and I guess I succeeded.
> 
> Don't forget to tell me your comments on the ending, it may be the last, but I am as eager to know your opinion as I was in the previous chapters~
> 
> And now, on a kind of sad note...
> 
> Goodbye!
> 
> Popsy's out~
> 
> PS: If you wanna find me on tumblr, tag's @gong-li-ya

**Author's Note:**

> Did I make you feel soft and warm? I hope so.
> 
> If you are wondering: yes, there will be sexy action, eventually.  
> See you guys soon~
> 
> Popsy out!


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